We Are Human First

smile

This article is about consent and negotiation and mistakes and hindsight. It’s about personal responsibility and compassion. There are reasons I don’t do pick up play and why I like to be at least friends with someone before I do a scene with them. When you play as a bottom you are trusting someone with your physical, mental, and emotional well-being for a certain amount … [Read more...]

Insecurities and the Kinky Eraser

Muscular man with nude torso

Disclaimer: this article references stereotypical body insecurities. I am not speaking to my personal idea of beauty. For many of you this article may not be very relevant – that’s ok. It does, however, apply to enough people that I felt it deserved some attention. I have had many conversations with people that are coming into the scene from the vanilla world. You know … [Read more...]

One kinky, One vanilla, One roof

heart love stones in the quarry

Often times an already established couple enters the scene together. Perhaps they’ve been dating a while, living together, or even married. They start going to a few classes and a munch or two. Perhaps they make it out to a party and start including kink during their “sexy time”. Unfortunately, after giving it a good shot, one partner just isn’t feeling it. Partner A feels … [Read more...]

Your Poly is Not My Poly and That’s OK!

incredible girl use this

So you see people identify as “poly” or “monogamous” (aka mono). Seems pretty clear cut. I wish it were that easy. When it comes to poly there are a gajillion variations. (Not an official number - lol) You can ask a dozen poly identified people to describe how they “do” poly and you are likely to get a dozen different answers. For some they are romantically mono but … [Read more...]

NRE: New Relationship Energy

poly hands

“New relationship energy (often abbreviated as NRE) is a state of mind experienced at the beginning of most significant sexual and romantic relationships, typically involving heightened emotional and sexual receptivity and excitement. It begins with the earliest attractions, grows into full force when mutuality is established, and slowly fades over months to years. It carries … [Read more...]