Rika’s Lair- Financial Dominance

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly!  I recently came across an online documentary regarding the topic of Financial Dominance (known as “Findom”). Most people, by now, … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair – The “Type-O” Submissive

The term “compatibility” pops up a lot in discussions about dominance and submission. “Difficulty finding a compatible partner with whom to establish a power dynamic” is the focus of many of the questions and letters I receive. It’s natural to highlight common tastes as requirements for your relationship search. Finding a partner for a lasting relationship (assuming it … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair- Please Stop

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly (and sometimes sooner than monthly!) column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly! For this article, I’d like to deviate from the discussion of theory, and have a little fun … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair – The “Gamification” of Submission

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box above for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly! This month, I wanted to share some ideas I originally introduced in my second book, “Uniquely Us” regarding a trend that I’ve … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair – Making Requests of Your Dominant, Without Topping from the Bottom

In last month’s column, we were discussing some basics regarding a mindset that cultivates the best possible submission for your relationship. We talked about a sequence that starts with the dominant’s introspection as to what truly serves them, the communication of that expectation, and the submissive’s responsibility to understand and adapt to that expectation in order to … [Read more...]