Setting the Scene

How to prepare for success and handle the occasional failure. You'd be a foolish person to assume that your scene will go 100% perfect every time. Sometimes a partner's headspace may not be in the right spot, maybe a toy breaks or you accidentally injure someone. These things happen and as responsible players, we know the risks associated with practicing BDSM. There are … [Read more...]

(Almost) Everything About Rope Bottoming

There is more to rope bottoming than just “hanging out and getting tied.” The styles of rigging vary from person to person as well as the broader stroke ideologies and “schools of thought” behind it. With all of this information out there, it can be difficult to disseminate what’s an absolute necessity and what is a preference. However in matters of safety, there are specific … [Read more...]

Changing Safewords

So the rule of thumb is typically that it’s better to stick with the more widely known Safewords. In Southern California we use the “traffic light” safewords of green, yellow, and red. It may or may not be different in different parts of the country or internationally – however, since I didn’t research that I won’t presume to know. First I will explain what (basically) … [Read more...]

Safety First!

Safety in this lifestyle comes in two varieties. The first regards safety when meeting for the first time from the Internet. The second concerns safety between scening partners. Let us take the first, first! And since the submissive is the one at the “mercy” of the Dominant, this article is directed more to the submissives. Reality check: you are statistically more likely … [Read more...]


No, this article isn’t about condoms or the Mafia protection racket. But, for a few of you, this could be one of the most important articles about BDSM you will ever read. Hyperbole, you ask? Maybe – but it could save you incredible expense and even jail time. This headline was featured in the September 21, 2016 New York Post -- “Authorities picked up a kinky Soho couple … [Read more...]