Especially right now with Covid-19 going on, people are online now more than ever. It’s paramount to stay safe when meeting people online. I am writing this article to give readers helpful tips on how to stay safe and healthy when floating through cyberspace.
First and foremost, do not put your last name, address, social media handles, or any other personal information on your profile.
If you would like to put any additional contact information in your bio, I would recommend having and/or creating an email address/social media handles that do not list your last name.
For further protection, apps such as kik and google voice can be used to keep your phone number confidential. These allow you to call and text folks you are talking to online. To me, if you would like to continue talking to someone it’s always a good idea to get off the app.
Once you are off the app, if someone presents red flags, unmatch and block them from the app right away. The same applies if they begin acting sketchy on the app too.
I suggest talking on the phone first before meeting. Not only does this help to verify the person you are talking to is real, but it’s a good way to see if there’s some sort of chemistry before meeting.
If you are going to Skype or Zoom before meeting, your username should not reveal any of your personal information besides your first name.
When meeting someone for the first time, always meet them in a public place where others gather as well. Preferably somewhere well-lit. It’s also a good idea to ask a friend in advance to be your “safe person.” What I mean by this is a friend that knows your location, who you are meeting, and expects you to check in during the date to let them know that you are okay. If you are comfortable sharing your location on your phone with this person that can be useful too. Also, some people choose to have a “safeword” such as “vanilla” to let their “safe person” know they are okay in a coded language. This way if the person you are meeting sees the text, they will not know what you’re talking about.
I suggest meeting someone for coffee on the first date/meeting. This way if anything makes you uncomfortable or you’re really not into the person, the date is already set up to be short and has a definite beginning and end. If coffee goes well, feel free to plan a longer date for the second time around.
With this being said, always go with your gut. Before meeting, if anything doesn’t feel or seem right I would unmatch and/or block and/or report the person depending on their behavior. Overly coercive or abusive language should be blocked and reported right away. Furthermore, anything non-consensual should be reported. Chances are if they are doing it to you, they have and/or are going to speak that way to someone else.
It’s our responsibility to our community and to others to report any unsafe behavior. We all need to ban together to keep everyone as safe as possible.
If you choose to send any kind of risque video or photo keep your face and any identifying marks such as tattoos out of it. There are a lot of non-consensual pic and video collectors out there. Some will even publish these pictures. You never know how this could come back to haunt you later.
I recommend not sending any kind of adult material until you truly know and trust someone. But that’s just my advice.
On top of all the other safe online practices listed above, if you are a sex worker, I highly reccomend never giving out your real name- first or last. Make up an alias and always stick to that. On all your online accounts that are used for work never post your real name. Have a separate email, paypal account, social media handles, etc. If anything needs to be mailed to you have a P.O box.
It’s very important to be discreet for this type of work. Keeping your personal life and work life separate is paramount. It will also help you compartmentalize work and help you to get in the headspace for work more easily.
I would also always meet clients at a residence that is different from your own. Protecting where you live is paramount.
In this day and age one can never be too careful. It’s essential to be cautious-not jaded-just cautious, mindful, and alert. I hope you have found this article helpful and filled with knowledge to think about when engaging with others online.
Lastly, I have met all of my partners online. So, I am in NO WAY against online dating. I am merely trying to create a safer cyberspace.
If you have any further questions please do not hesitate to reach out. As always thanks for reading and stay tuned!
About the Author
Slave Bunny is involved in a wonderful and loving TPE 24/7 M/S relationship with her Master and husband. She is also the Creative Director of Kink Weekly.
She has dedicated her life to working on herself mentally, spiritually, and physically, and hopes to inspire others to do the same. Through teaching and mentoring, she hopes to help everyone in the Kink community as much as she can.
Feel free to add her on Fetlife (Slave_Bunny992) to see her upcoming workshops and classes.