Rika’s Lair-Avoiding Ineffective Motivation

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly!  The catalyst for this article is a discussion I had with a man who was looking for advice on creating a contract with his wife … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair- Giving Directions vs. Setting Direction

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly!  In my latest book, “Uniquely Dominant: Being the Dominant in a D/s Relationship”, I have a section on determining the style of … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair- Financial Dominance

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly!  I recently came across an online documentary regarding the topic of Financial Dominance (known as “Findom”). Most people, by now, … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair – The “Type-O” Submissive

The term “compatibility” pops up a lot in discussions about dominance and submission. “Difficulty finding a compatible partner with whom to establish a power dynamic” is the focus of many of the questions and letters I receive. It’s natural to highlight common tastes as requirements for your relationship search. Finding a partner for a lasting relationship (assuming it … [Read more...]

Rika’s Lair- Please Stop

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly (and sometimes sooner than monthly!) column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly! For this article, I’d like to deviate from the discussion of theory, and have a little fun … [Read more...]