Then…
I tried not to move, to stay still, but I was shaking uncontrollably. I was naked…on all fours…on hands and knees with my legs spread in between two women, two incredible women. It was only moments before that the three of us stood in polite conversation, all well dressed and socializing as you would at any dinner party.
But we weren’t socializing any more, not exactly. I could hear the two amazing women carrying on a conversation without me, both enjoying themselves, at my expense, apparently. Even as I was clearly struggling, suffering, I was ecstatic and aroused, my mind racing over how I got here and how eager I was to please both women, eager to see them smile.
“Wider… spread your legs, bitch.” I obeyed the voice coming from behind me instantly “That’s it, fucking slut… wait, did I say you could look away? Look up. Keep your eyes on her.” The voice had such authority and power but as I started to look up I felt deeply ashamed, embarrassed to look into the eyes of the gorgeous woman in front of me.
I hesitated, from the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of a couple standing off to the side, the stunning woman familiar to me. But in that moment all I could see was her stunned expression, only a glance at her lovely face showed the slight shock she felt or maybe it was something else. Disgust. Revulsion. Amusement. I suppose in that moment I’d hoped for arousal to match my own, but I knew better.
As the shame washed over me again, I tried to avert my gaze but the Princess’ delicate hands were like steel cradling my face. Her sparkling eyes saw every moment of my anguish and ecstasy and I could feel her delicious, hot breath as she hissed at me. I looked up & savored her wicked, gorgeous smile.
“Look at me! Don’t try to hide… face it, you’re useless…. helpless.”
Now….
“Please, no…” I can’t hear myself speak very well, blood rushing in my ears, but my voice cracks a little as I sputter my plea.
“Oh, yes….” Her voice is sweet with a soothing tone as she lets the words linger between us, her beautiful smile all I can see. “You’re disgusting, pathetic.” Such cruelty in the words, spoken with conviction & deep satisfaction as she leans in closer. My fear is palpable, I’m panting & we both feel my temperature rising.
“Thank You, Mistress.” My gratitude is there, hidden in the agony I’m feeling as my ego withers, all confidence washed away with the sweat and fear I feel as I tremble in my chair. I barely recall that we’re seated out on the patio of the restaurant, almost empty but for the two of us and a few others casually chatting & enjoying their meal and polite conversations. No one is close enough to hear us, to hear my groveling.
“What’s wrong, bitch?” Her voice is warm & happy, her eyes sparkle to match the obvious pleasure in all of it as she savors my fear and agony. “Answer me, bitch.” Her lovely smile chases away my reason and the steel in her voice at those words has me scrambling, eager to obey.
“I’m… I mean, nothing’s wrong, Mistress.” My face and eyes betray it all, the truth that I’m hot, aroused beyond all understanding, my body on fire to match the heat of my shame as I melt. The joy she’s taking in tearing me apart & watching as I struggle to make sense of it all. Of any of it. She’s just getting started.
“Really? You don’t think there’s anything wrong with any of…this?” Her delicate hand gestures at me, at all of me. “We both know that’s not true. Are you lying to my fucking face? ” Her eyes show pure disgust and a flash of anger, all the while her sparkling eyes and glowing smile reflect the pleasure she’s feeling.
“I’m sorry, No! I mean, ‘No, Mistress’, I don’t…I do know it’s wrong that I….” She’s enjoying my struggle as I melt, my mind frying faster as I stare, blankly and afraid, into her gorgeous face. “That I…”
“Exactly. All wrong. It’s wrong that you… WHAT?” She’s smiling as she raises her voice ever so slightly, more of a harsh whisper. She’s commanding me to explain what’s wrong with me, to confess for us both to hear.
“A lot’s wrong…” I try and smile and rush to continue. “It’s wrong that I enjoy being degraded, humiliated…”
“Did you say ‘enjoy’? That’s a polite way of putting it, don’t you think, bitch?” She cuts me off with a lovely sneer and leans back a little as her mind turns on it all. “Try again.”
“I’m sorry, Mistress. It’s wrong that I’m… aroused by humiliation, excited when you’re cruel to me.” I stop as she shakes her head and raises her hand slightly towards me face.
“Oh no, bitch. We’re talking about you, freak. Leave me out of this…” She stares me down, her smile still there as I squirm slightly in my seat. “… you are a fucking pervert.” Her voice is cold, authoritative and I feel about a foot tall.
In that moment I realize that anyone seeing us might think I’m a boyfriend being chided.
No. Not boyfriend. More like a child being scolded.
“Go on, freak.”
“It’s wrong that I get off on being insulted and abused. That I enjoy it, that I….” I feel my head swim as I try and find a way to explain myself away, to justify any of my feelings in these moments. Her stunning smile makes that practically impossible.
“I’m a pervert. I know I shouldn’t enjoy these things….” Another moment of terror washes over me as I try and think of the next thing to say, sorting through a long list of revolting acts I’ve performed…. and enjoyed. I see her smile as she waits, patiently. Anticipating my twisted thoughts moving to ever darker fantasies I have yet to experience.
“Please, go on. I think you’re getting the picture now. I know that you forget it all sometimes.” She smiles brightly and continues. “You pretend you’re normal. You delude yourself. It’s disgusting and wrong to play act as a real boy around Women and actual, real Men.” Her words linger & sink in, tearing into me like a surgeon’s scalpel. Even so, every sense I have is on fire right now and all I want is to stay there for more.
“The truth hurts, freak.” She’s smiling and I’m burning up, flush & excited beyond any kind of reason. “Oh, I’m sorry, I interrupted you, though. How very rude of me.” Her sarcastic tone is delightful and light and no one but her and I know how deeply this all cuts me, no one else feels the harsh steel in the wicked order to confess ever more, her voice so lovely and confident.
“Thank you, Mistress” By contrast, my own voice falters, I know I’m whispering but I feel as though I’m shouting through the rush in my ears, the throbbing I feel all over. “The truth is that I’m just…wrong to want…” Her gaze turns icy cold as she sees me try to mitigate the damage. “I’m sorry, Mistress, I mean that I love to kneel and…”
I’m fishing for more words when I can see, out of the corner of my eye, the Waitress approach our table. In just a few moments when she gets to the table she’ll likely be ringside for a show. I assume that she’s going to take our order but I bet she’ll be getting fries with that order, so to speak.
My mind races, scrambling for a way to recover, to save myself, my dignity, somehow hide what’s happening between the two of us. I’m practically falling to pieces, a wave of hot shame washing over me and I can see my Mistress drinking it all in, my fear and anticipation. No matter what happens next, we both know I won’t run, not ever. I’ll be eager to please her beyond reason, past common sense, to parts unknown to either of us.
We are both smiling for vastly different reasons. I feel ridiculous and revolting, feeling everyone’s eyes on me, feeling as though they can see what this woman can see in me. The things she revels in laying it all bare and finding ever darker corners to expose and enjoy.
I’m paralyzed as I see her satisfied smile at my suffering, frozen in place even as I’m burning alive.
CAservice is an experienced, service oriented edge player in Los Angeles. Active in the local community, he is honored to be an Elite boy for Club WICK and a founding member of SSGA. When he’s not busy writing down the naughty thoughts in his brain, he can be seen serving at the feet of an number of Dominas.
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