bdsm relationship

Being Dominant and Being A Dominant-Worlds Apart

July 23, 2021 By TAC 2 Comments

Woman and man playing domination games in bed together

There have been a rash of questions on our educational sites lately similar to the following, “Can a guy become dominant if it doesn’t naturally come to them?”

It’s a good question but needs more context. Too often we see people confusing the difference between a Top (the dominant role during a scene) and being a Dominant, the head of a power exchange relationship. Through conversation, we often find what they mean, is being a Top.

I wrote about this difference some time ago in a shorter article addressing the difference. In it I wrote this short piece and asked the readers to comment and react:

“Just because my personality is dominant, does not make me a Dominant.

Just because I have self-discipline and a dominant personality, does not mean I am a Dominant, or would even be a good one.

Just because I have a submissive, does not mean I am a Dominant.

All of these things are pieces and parts brought together by will, intelligence, need, diligence, consistency, integrity, self-motivation, selflessness and selfishness, and the ability to bond deeply with another person through the development of trust and the vulnerability of emotional connection. Using all of the aforementioned to develop a skill set which enables a person to show they are able to take on the committed role and can be trusted. Giving the submissive an opportunity to be as the title implies.

It is a web of factors which takes time, patience, practice, and guidance to form a larger whole.

Anyone can call themselves anything, but until they realize it is much more than any one or two things culminating in being a Dominant, they will only ever be dominant. There is a difference.”

All Hell Broke Loose

As you can imagine, there were some very strong opinions which came out of this conversation. Everything from dominants are born not made, dominants can be made even if they never leaned that way before etc. etc. It seemed like everyone had an opinion as to how someone inclined becomes properly a Dominant.

Lacking was discussion on what might actually contribute to someone being a successful dominant. Out of the hundred or so replies there were exactly zero about a dominant’s make up, only argument about what was properly a Dominant or not. It was at the very least disheartening.

It was then I determined to write about what, in my opinion, really contributed to being a Dominant, not merely dominance. It wound up being 14 articles, with the Dominant’s Creed as its basis to give readers a baseline to follow. Some of that I am regurgitating here in this piece.

At the Center

I think nothing happens in this lifestyle which does not include the core of a person. Who they are underneath it all. Stripping away the façade of titles, costumes, toys, and the persona they may put on for others. In the end, whether they have a chance to be successful rests with them being a good person or not. Nothing more complicated than that. Regardless of the type of dynamic there are some commonalities which allow us to be that which we seek in kink.

Integrity and honesty, empathy and compassion, maturity and thoughtfulness, self-confidence and self-awareness, internal drive and motivation are among the many traits combined into a successful cocktail which enables others to see us as a potential Dominant. Because without a sub-type who wants our dominance, what good is it. First, they need to say yes.

Without that initial spark to which they are attracted in that submissive way, we are a rowboat without paddles.

If we happen to fake the funk and get someone to accept us and we are not a good person? Eventually it is going to melt down. People will get hurt emotionally, and possibly physically. The relationship will end simply because we have not taken the time to work on ourselves and become prepared to be that Dominant.

Sure there are plenty of submissives out there who could spell disaster for us because they may not be a good person. However, we are not in control of them, only ourselves. There is not point in duping someone, or waiting till after a relationship is established to get ourselves squared away.

So We Find a Submissive

Great, now what? As I stated in the first portion of this article there is so much more than just being in that relationship. It takes effort and commitment. A whole lot more talking going on than playing, or at least there should be in my opinion. How can we be an effective Dominant to someone if we do not know them well?

I am not just talking about what they do for work, or if they have kids, or the hobbies they like. We need to dig deep into who this person is and why they are who they are. And they us. At a brutal level of honesty. This is going to be the lever that allows us to appreciate them as a person. Be accepting of the bad, not just the good. To see past the front we all put up in a new relationship because we all want to put our best foot forward.

This willingness to learn our partner in an emotionally intimate way speaks of our ability to be empathic and compassionate. Two of our greatest and most used tools as Dominants. They council us to listen more than speak, to ask probing questions, and to really hear and understand our partner. Without this, we step on many more landmines than necessary.

No, Simply Demanding it Does Not Mean You’ll Get It

Even if we are a good person and have managed to find a submissive who is committed to us, we cannot be jerks about it, if we want it to last. Way back when dirt was invented and I was a new dominant, I thought that was the way it was supposed to work. I quickly found out otherwise to my shame and embarrassment.

There is a duty of care and responsibility which comes with being a Dominant. That we first are looking out for the best interest of our submissive. Even as a Master, we have to be careful of this, even more so as a committed slave is less likely to come to their own defense in many cases, unless the situation is dire. This is not possible without having developed a deep understanding of our sub-type.

They are placing their trust in us to lead them in a way which not only fulfills our desires but helps them grow and fulfills theirs. If all we are is a machine which compels compliance without thought to the impact on our charge, the chances of the dynamic lasting long or very small.

Creating a Gravitational Pull

The moon stays in orbit around Earth because of the gravity it exerts. Similarly, being that good person at our core helps us create an emotional gravity which captures our submissive and keeps them in our orbit. It allows them to open up to us, in turn, freeing us to be that Dominant they desire. I say freeing because without that pull, everything becomes a struggle where we are having to work to keep them enthralled and interested.

The dynamic becomes work, like the kind we do not appreciate so much. Not to be confused with the effort it takes to maintain a healthy relationship.

It also frees our submissive to be accepting of our dominance. They can begin to and continue to trust us because they have learned we are a person worth trusting. Sure we have to do much more than just be a good and decent person. But it is a beginning worth striving for, and one which becomes foundational for a long-term commitment.

The Goal

I think most of us want to have that stability in our relationships, even if they are not romantic. The purpose driven commitment to and of another person bringing a constant into our universe to look forward to, cherish, and rely upon in good times and bad.

Is not this the hub on which all else turns? Our ability to maintain a healthy relationship with another person? To do that, to build that, we need to work on ourselves first.

Realizing to become a Dominant, we must master ourselves first. If we do not, we will only ever be dominant.

If you are interested in the Dominant’s Creed articles I mentioned earlier in this writing visit this link to my page on FetLife – TAC_1’s Writings | FetLife

BDSM And Personal Discovery

July 23, 2021 By Christmas Bunny 2 Comments

how sub woman in chains and leather — via stock.adobe.com

Some of us, one could argue both the lucky and the unlucky ones, knew we wanted something other than the vanilla heteronormative relationships that society in the 80’s and 90’s tried to condition is to want. Lucky because it is easier to find something when you know you’re looking for it; unlucky because you’d be surprised how many people want nothing to do with someone questioning and experimenting with their own sexuality. Perhaps my experiences would have been different today, but I can only embrace that which is mine and move forward with that knowlege.

Had I desired that vanilla heteronormativity, I’d have had lots of opportunities to figure myself out in middle and high school. Unfortunately, instead my late middle school and high school years are a jumble of memories of cuddling with females and being too afraid to take that next step for fear of rejection, and dark porn, clearly staged, badly acted, and a foundation for some sexual imprinting. For those of use who want bondage or any kind of same sex relationships, we don’t have those same opportunities to explore. That’s why the jokes about lesbians not knowing if they are being hit on and awkward bisexuals exist. We lack that early practice and have to stumble through the finding ourselves part while trying to have adult relationships. That’s a lot of pressure all at once.

The same goes for kink. We don’t have shibari opportunities in high school to figure out what works for us. So we all just do the best that we can and figure things out along the way as we figure them out. We are all on our own timelines. Some of us don’t discover that the things we like are not “normal” until someone slaps us in the face with that information. Maybe literally, who knows?

So what does that mean for the questing adult who has tripped over kink rather than sought it out? I have wondered lately how to explain what we do to someone without the foundation I assume people have when they seek us out. I suppose I would start this way:

Kink is many things to many people. It is not up to me to decide how an individual defines that for themself. It is not for me to judge provided the desired activity is consented to by and with a human of legal age who is capable of giving consent, and does not have the purpose of doing lasting harm, rather than fleeting hurt.

I would tell them kink can absolutely be sexual, but that it doesn’t have to be. Sure, threesomes are probably classified in there somewhere as kink, but when the umbrella encompasses so much variety and many different viewpoints, often times sex can take a backseat to pain, even if that pain has sexual connotations or elements to the people engaging in its practice.

I would tell them to find something that appeals to them, and then to seek out more information. Read books, browse fet, find local people and have conversations. Though it can be difficult, try not to find us scary or intimidating. We’re just normal people who happen to have bonded over a common interest. With some it’s video games or comic books, sports, or food. With us, we bond over kink. It’s easy enough to fit right in.

Above all, I would tell them to ask questions. It’s okay not to know everything. Our honesty is our strength. Everyone won’t know everything., and it is okay not to know this.

Most of all, I would suggest finding someone trustworthy to show them the rules. We see consent very differently from the whole of mainstream society. Sadly. It shouldn’t be different, yet the kink community’s views on consent are so much more empowering than the old rules I was raised with. Even with those differences, missteps are easy. Having a guide can make a huge difference.

Be open to new experience. Every day is a gift when we accept what is coming.

This week in kink: July 26, 2021

July 23, 2021 By Dexx 2 Comments

Don’t miss Mistress Eva’s kinky travel guide from Flipboard!

Check out this awesome advice about BDSM dating sites from Vents Magazine!

Everything to know about BDSM Dating sites

Harry Potter apparently has a naughty side! Click below to find out more about 17 NSFW things that transpired at Hogwarts from Buzz Feed!

Have some kinky news to share? Tell us about any upcoming BDSM events, new products, dungeon openings / closings, kink in mainstream media, and anything else you think kinky folks might be interested to hear about. Send your tips through to kinkweekly@gmail.com, and it might just end up on next week’s “This Week in Kink.”

Identifying as a Submissive: What does that mean?

July 15, 2021 By Ms. Rika 3 Comments

woman tied to chair splashed with water — via stock.adobe.com

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box for links to all my articles in KinkWeekly!

This afternoon, I had a good discussion (online) with one of my readers, who was challenging the notion that the definition of submission must come from the dominant. In his challenge, he stated that this statement excludes people who self-identify as submissives who do not have a dominant to serve. As far as the discussion goes, I stand firmly with my statement – however, his point got me thinking about “self-identification” as a submissive and what that really means.

The process of self-identification is an important part of today’s gender and sexuality discussions. It is an effective tool to break through predefined constructs and to open the door to more open thinking. I do, however, feel it’s rapidly becoming overused, particularly when it’s applied in ways that go beyond the gender discussion. You can identify as a lot of things…but sometimes calling yourself something doesn’t really make you that.

In BDSM and D/s circles, people self-identify a lot. You have people who declare their preferences by labeling themselves. Words like “dominant”, “submissive”, “fetishist”, etc., are thrown about without real definition. Even the words “Submission” and “Dominance” can mean different things to different people, so calling oneself a “Dominant” or “Submissive” only has meaning when we understand what dominance and submission mean to that person. Having a “fetish” actually has a dictionary definition,

but modern usage has thrown away the clinical meaning in favor of “This REALLY makes me hot!”. Since there is no credentialing system, people are free to declare themselves “Dominant of the world” and no one can really argue. In reality, the labels are meaningless – but they bring a sense of belonging and inclusion to folks, so why not?

Getting back to the basis of the discussion, how can you define submission without a dominant?

I searched for an analogy to support my point and I arrived at a reasonable one: A man who REALLY enjoys cooking and feels he’s good at it, decides to self-identify as “A Chef”. Let’s say he only cooks for himself at this point. In my mind, this self-identification is closely analogous to the man who really likes the idea of submitting and calls himself “A Submissive” – although a submissive doesn’t submit to himself.

My self-identified “Chef” doesn’t have anyone to cook for at this point. Can he really be a chef? Would you hire him to cook for you?

My assertion is that self-identifying as a Chef is a statement of your passion. It’s your preference and “identity” and it means that you want to cook. I further assert, however, that when this person is hired to cook for someone, the recipesthat are needed are subject to the tastes and preferences of the person. What KIND of chef does that person need / prefer: a meat chef; a fish chef; a pastry chef; a sauce chef? Until you know what type of chef is desired – or what type of recipes the person for whom you are cooking prefers, you can’t define the content of the food that will satisfy them. You might be a “chef”, but you don’t know what you’re cooking until you know what’s ordered!

Self-identifying as a submissive is all well and good as a statement of preference and identity…but until you have someone to submit to, you can’t define submission. Submission, since it’s tied to what you are doing for another person, requires that other person to be there. You can’t submit to nothing. Submission must be received as submissionto be realized. If you doubt that, ask the myriad of folks who are frustrated trying to submit to a partner who won’t accept their efforts from a position of dominance or who are unfulfilled with “stealth-submission” because the meaning is missing without reception. Can you identify as a submissive without submitting to anyone? I suppose you can, but there isn’t really any definition in that label.

In fact, trying to define it without a partner can be detrimental. I have met a lot of folks who try to define submission without consideration for a specific partner. They have preconceived notions of what submission is and what dominance looks like. They create their own challenges by doing this. Very often, they talk about “finding compatibility” (usually in the context of NOT being able to find a compatible partner), which is really a colloquialism for “trying to find someone who has defined submission the same way that they did”, which, if you really think about it, is basically confirming that the dominant is the one setting the definition of submission, it’s just that they happen to want the same!

BTW: These are often the same folks who accuse their partners of not being “dominant enough”… or … “not knowing how to dominate” or “needing training in how to dominate” or any number of other inappropriate attacks. Don’t be that guy.

There is also the notion that someone will be a good submissive because they are “experienced”. What does that mean in the context of a new dominant; with new preferences, tastes, and desires? I’d buy into it if they said, “I’ll make a good submissive because I have experience adapting to how people define submission to them. My skill is learning and adapting.” THAT statement, I’d believe. But thinking that they’d be a good submissive for dominant ‘B’ because they served dominant ‘A’ doesn’t fly.

So, self-identification as a submissive is fine. Identity is important and preferences are important. If the label means something to you, use it. However, defining submission without a dominant to serve is folly. If your goal is to serve your dominant, you need to allow that dominant to define what serves them. Then you know what “dish” is required of you and you can work to deliver that.

Ms. Rika is a lifestyle dominant, educator, and author; living in the suburbs of NYC with her husband/slave. She has written several popular books on her approach to adding Dominant-Centric, Service-Oriented D/s to relationships. You can find her books (in both print and eBook formats) at Lulu.com (http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/msrika), or at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, the iStore, Books-A Million, Kobo.com, or anywhere books are sold. Search for “Ms. Rika”. Write to me at Ms_Rika@hotmail.com

This week in kink: July 19, 2021

July 15, 2021 By Dexx 2 Comments

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What’s The Difference Between An Orgy and A Gang Bang?

July 8, 2021 By Dame TylerRose. 2 Comments

bdsm leather submissive collar — via stock.adobe.com

Gang Bang – one person is the central focus with several others fucking that person.Most people think of one room, one chick (guest of honor), and a buncha dudes. But there are gangbang nights at venues, with numerous women in attendance. They hit one of the beds at varying times through the evening. Some of the men will participate in more than one group.Most people also think the center person must be surrounded by partners with all the hands and mouths working. Personally, I prefer the “train” method. One after the other, take a number and form a line.The woman picks her crew, hits a bed, has her fun, and they all leave the bed when they’re done. The sheet is changed and ready for another group. The same woman may pick another crew and go at it again, two or three times, or more.While the party may last four or five hours, I’ve not personally seen any group encounter last much more than twenty minutes, for some reason.

Orgy — “Do people walk into an orgy expecting anyone can do anything to them or that they can do anything to anyone?”
I’ve never seen an orgy at which anyone could do anything they wanted to anyone else. Consent still matters and, as I said, the events I’ve been to have been mostly heterosexual affairs. Bisexual men and women may be in attendance, but I’ve not personally seen man on man, woman on woman action. Or a woman pegging a man.

Sidebar: I’m not saying it doesn’t happen. Just that I’ve not seen it at the parties I’ve attended. (I’ve been to three venues and countless individual parties in the last four out of five years. The scene was put on hold for the plague.) Some venues have multiple rooms. I can’t be everywhere at once.I don’t attend bisexual or lesbian events, and heterosexual men aren’t interested in seeing man on man action. If there’s bi-action to be had, the het-men want to see two women together. Single het-men are the largest demographic at the parties I’ve attended. Since they pay the most to get in, they are the ones funding the party and making the promoter rich. Women are usually free to get in. If women were charged to get in, few would attend. (It’s called Gender Pricing.)If women don’t attend, there’s no party.

Consent & Rules — Just because you’re in the big bed with 10 people doesn’t mean everyone can touch, fuck, suck, and lick every body part that comes within reach. Check the rules of the party before you attend. If you still aren’t sure, contact the organizer. Everyone has to mind your manners and ASK if they can touch. If they can suck. If they can fuck. If they can lick. If a couple is already going at it, you have to ask if you can join in. Some parties have a rule not to approach if people are already engaged, to wait until they are done and have left the bed to ask the woman if she would like to play with you. If you ask and the answer is no, then you don’t do that thing. Nor do you ask again. The answer was no. There’s no badgering allowed. There may be two or three beds pushed together to make a large surface, but there are also usually beds off to the side for those who don’t want to be on the big bed. A couple might have their play apart from the group. There’s no rule that everyone at an orgy has to be playing on the same bed or together. An orgy could also be a bunch of couples playing on separate beds. The definitions say: “wild or drunken festivity or revelry, especially involving sex with multiple participants” or “indiscriminate sex”. If we are to strictly follow the definitions, none of the “orgies” I’ve been to have been orgies. Because not everyone is drunk, and it’s not really that wild. It’s all rather orderly and not all that indiscriminate. They’re remarkably vanilla, straightforward sex with very little or no kink or SM activity, even when the venue itself is SM positive.
Excerpt from: The upcoming book Questions Frequently Asked About BDSM

Submit To The Person

July 8, 2021 By Ms. Rika 2 Comments

lesbians kissing, Shibari — via stock.adobe.com

Today, I’m thinking about a tendency among many submissives, to think of a dominant as the entire person, rather than as a dynamic in a relationship with a person. You’ll hear them say, “I’m looking for ‘A Dominant’”, “Why can’t I find more ‘Dominants’?”, “I’m A Submissive, I need A Dominant”. It is as if the person is defined solely by their preference when it comes to power dynamics. The notion is that ‘A Dominant’ is what a person is…when, in reality, a person ‘is’ a lot of things – including being a dominant in their relationships.

From my perspective as a dominant woman, I see this predominantly from male submissives (but it is certainly not limited to a specific gender). Very often, they approach women, looking for ‘A Dominant’ without any consideration for who the woman really is. Worse, they have often already defined what ‘A Dominant’ is, and are looking for it, exclusively. The ‘Dominant’ is viewed as a collective object – predictable based solely on their preference for “dominance” – and consistent from person to person (as long as they “know how to dominate”). Any dominant will do, because they are believed to be interchangeable. Of course, since that’s not true, this often can create serious issues with the relationship.

This viewpoint manifests itself in several common ways: Many submissives have a predetermined view of what ‘a dominant’ does; how they act; their attitude; their dress – and don’t see a person as dominant unless they meet those criteria. Or, they may discover that they don’t have compatibility with a dominant from a relationship perspective, even though they’ve had compatibility in kink. Or, they may not recognize dominance, if it doesn’t match the femininely-styled masculine image of a dominant.

I’ve discussed this last point before; the notion that dominance equatesto masculinity – and therefore, female dominance is thought of as a femininely-stylized imitation of masculinity. In my previous articles, I’ve pointed out that the porn-imagery of the female dominant shows women as ‘penetrators’ with strap-ons, in biker leathers (stylized), and having the heels of their boots (stylized jack boots) sucked ‘like a cock’. The notion that someone who doesn’t prefer traditionally masculine qualities (e.g., aggression, anger, micro-management, competitiveness, desire to overpower, etc.) is not ‘allowed’ in that imagery of dominance.

Relationships are a complex collection of traits, personalities, and dynamics. Power dynamics are just one of many dynamics that may exist in a relationship. The person who is the dominant has many other facets totheir personalities – most having absolutely nothing to do with power dynamics. If you enter a relationship with a person, solely based on one dynamic or attribute, you are destined to encounter problems and potentially dissolution of the relationship. For example, people who have entered relationships because “the sex was so good”, have experienced the same types of issues. Folks doing the same for power dynamics likely are headed for similar negative outcomes.

The key here, is to submit to the person, not to their role in a dynamic. If you’re thinking something longer-termed than sharing a scenario, dedicating yourself in service to someone is a serious commitment. There needs to be something about that PERSON that makes you want to submit to them.

Something more than their gender and that they identify as dominant. You are submitting to the entire person, who they are, not just what role they prefer to play. You must get to know who they are to be able to establish a relationship based on more than power dynamics. Only then can you customize your submission to mold and serve the full person.

The next time you feel like engaging with someone who identifies as ‘dominant’, try to identify what it is about that unique person that is drawing you to serve them. If it’s nothing more than their gender and preference for dominance, slow down, get to know who they really are, and then THEN make the decision to submit!

Entering Back Into The Scene

July 8, 2021 By Baadmaster 2 Comments

power exchange couple with ribbon — via stock.adobe.com

As we all start returning to our usual pre-covid ways, I would guess that one of the problems specific to our lifestyle is the “If you don’t use it you lose it” principle. I know my flogging skills have deteriorated quite a bit. As an example, I was playing with a new sub last Saturday and actually missed the target get a couple of times. Fortunately, I was aware that when dealing with ropes, canes and floggers it is easy to screw up after an enforced “vacation.” The oft-quoted principle of “Dominant Infallibility”comes up very short after a layoff. This article, in place of my usual ”Ask BaadMaster”column, is a collection of tips to make your transition back into our world of dungeons and discipline a little easier. So here goes:

Go Slow. My first tip, distilled from my experiences as outlined in the introduction, is to “Go Slow.” Just as athletes take it slow when returning from an injury, we should too. This is especially true in impact play. And this +approach would apply to the bottoms/subs too. Like it or not, subs can be very demanding. So when first playing, don’t goad the Top into hitting you harder. We waited so long to get back our play spaces, one week or two won’t be that critical

Opportunity knocks.. If you are in a no-protocol or low-protocol relationship, it is easy to add a few rituals to your arsenal. For example, after your sub comes home on a Friday night and you have cleared out some play time, instruct her/him to perform a greeting ritual. Typically, the sub kneels in front of the Dominant and kisses his feet. Or, introduce some leash and collar play. Either of these not only adds a new dimension to your sub’s submission, but it also helps transition him/her from the basically vanilla world of quarantine to BDSM play. Just adding a little extra pre-D/s can work wonders when you finally get back to BDSM.

Add a new toy. I know you have lots of toys, but I doubt you own every one that is made! Search for a new toys at the local sex shop or online BDSM store. It might take a some effort, but as the martial artists (and sadists, too) say, “No pain, no gain!”
Add some discipline into your play life. This can get a bit tricky, because you cannot suddenly become a stern disciplinarian when you have not been one a year or more. I would tackle an area you have been neglecting. For example, have her wear a specific makeup that gets you hot; tell her to dress in fetish clothes or demand she do specific acts that you have discussed but have not gotten around to doing. Every couple has a few of these. If she refuses, then you can get into the punishment mode that can also be exciting. (This is from an “Ask BaadMaster” query,)
Use unique punishments. Since there is every chance your sub might not comply with your orders after a year or more away from the Dungeon,, you must devise some new and unique punishments that get you off and she has not experienced. For example, one punishment I find particularly effective is the use of a baby pacifier. Just the threat of making your partner wear one can have a profound impact. Many Dom/me’s use sexual deprivation as punishment. This is a great opportunity to expand your BDSM palette.
Don’t forget rewards. This one is easy to overlook. Piercings, tattoos and BDSM jewelry might work perfectly, depending on your relationship. And, if you expand your reward criteria to the non-BDSM world, you will have no trouble rewarding your sub for her excellent behavior.
Don’t call it a comeback! (Thanks, LL!) Don’t forget to include the most basic aspects of play when you are scening. It might seem obvious, but – even at the risk of looking foolish – go over safe words, safe signals and do not forget aftercare! Better to look foolish than be foolish.

Read our archives. There are tons of great articles archived here on Kink Weekly! Not only can you be a more effective Dom/me or sub with additional knowledge, but you can short-circuit the time needed to get back into top form.

This pandemic has had widespread affects on just about every field of endeavor – from chess to BDSM play. But think of it as an opportunity. Since one key to our lifestyle is inventiveness, use this chance to be…inventive!!!

After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

This week in kink news: July 12, 2021

July 8, 2021 By Dexx 2 Comments

Don’t miss reading about a four day long, Covid-compliant sex festival in England!

Click below to read more from GRM daily!

Hundreds of people attend “covid compliant” four-day long sex festival in Lincolnshire

Be sure to check out Caroline’s story of becoming an orgasm coach from Echo!

Click below to find out more!

Tune in to see if Netflix’s Bonding has been renewed or canceled!

Click below to read more from TVShowsAce!

‘Bonding’ Season 3: Canceled Or Renewed By Netflix?

Scenes For New Doms With Experienced Submissives

July 8, 2021 By Evie Lupine 2 Comments

Identify as a D-type?

New to the scene?

Want to know how to play safely?

Then, check out this amazing video from the fabulous Evie Lupine!

Scenes for New Doms with Experienced Submissives

Watch this video on YouTube

stubsub on Identifying as a Submissive: What does that mean?i feel that you're conflating here the definition of a submissive with the expectations and preferences of a Dominant. This...
masodreamer on Erotica: The Master and The MonsterIncredible work!!!! Keep it up!!!
caracoughs on BDSM And Personal Discoverylove love love

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