• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • About
  • New to kink?
    • Articles for beginners
  • Contribute
  • BDSM Buying Guide

Kink Weekly

BDSM articles ideas bondage erotica resource

Home » gender roles

gender roles

How To Craft A Successful Feminization Scene

September 12, 2020 By Baadmaster 2 Comments

Reader: My submissive is a part-time drag queen. We’re interested in trying a multi-day feminization scene. I’m not certain of techniques to keep it going for such a long time without the scene becoming boring. Can you spare any advice, tips, or information?

Since this is a multi-day scene you are attempting, I feel there are safety issues as well as boredom ones here. After all, a multi-day scene is unusual enough to be exciting in and of itself! So, let’s talk about safety.
Now without being privy to your actual game plan – and the specifics of your relationship – much of this advice will be laid out in general terms. That said, let’s examine the safety issues. (I think by now I can skip the sterilization admonitions that come with this pandemic; they have been covered ad-infinitum).

In your scene, safety concerns are less the physical ones than the emotional or psychological ones. Obviously, you should both agree on a safe word and a safe signal. But the presence of a safe word/signal, in this type of scene, does not by itself guarantee safety. That is because it is not the physical aspects of forced feminization scenes that are the most dangerous. For most players, these scenes present few physical dangers (excepting cock & ball torture and such — which might or might not be part of your scene). Despite the lack of true physical danger, forced feminization scenes can be very, very, very (notice the multiple “very’s”!) intense. They, by their very nature, enter into areas that can be psychically sensitive.

In your case, you are about to embark on a multi-day scene. When doing a scene over such an extended time frame, you can wander into areas that you might not ordinarily enter into – both good and bad. The bad aspects can be traced to the fact that psychic reactions can run deeper here than in your typical one or two hour scene. Oft times “forced feminization” scenes bring up gender identity and humiliation issues that are usually self-limiting in a shorter scene.

One thing working in your favor is that your submissive already is a part time drag queen. Thus, “forced feminization” is something, I am sure, he has already fantasized about. But, you must be totally aware of how far he wants you to take it and what his limits are. Does he have true transgender needs that a long scene of this nature might have an effect on? Transgender issues are not to be toyed with. These are serious, and very delicate, aspects of the human psyche.

You should also grasp the scope of the scene so as to stop it — even without a safe word being uttered. If you see that your submissive is having problems within the scene, you must be sensitive enough to go slow, alter it or stop it on your own.

You must really have a deep understanding of your submissive before you get into areas where gender identity is played with. As the Top, you must not cross those boundaries that can cause psychic damage to your submissive. A short one-hour play scene is one thing. A multi-day scene is another thing entirely.

A long scene of extreme duration has a totally different dynamic than your average short scene. Let me give you a real life example. A slave I know had no trouble being caged for a few hours. But when her Master wanted to cage her for three days, she refused to partake – even at risk of their relationship. (In fact, this incident destroyed it.) Long time frames radically alter the actual act itself.

In your case, since this is a first-time scene for you, you must be acutely aware of the multi-day aspects of it. If you are diligent about keeping control over your scene at all times, understand your submissive very well and grasp the danger inherent in your scene, you will be able to have an awesome experience.


After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

Tagged With: bdsm, cross dressing, drag queen, feminization scene, fetish, gender queer, gender roles, kink, LGBTQ

Chastity for Everyone! Part Two

August 22, 2016 By Baadmaster 2 Comments

metal leather cuffs

Read part one here.

Let’s start with a BDSM riddle: “A Master asks his slave to spank him. Does this change the D/s dynamic?”
The answer, at least to this observer, is that it likely won’t. Although the slave might not have signed on to be a pain-giver, he/she will probably grin and “just do it.”

In this brave new world of gender – and even play – fluidity, it is likely that this will not harm a solid M/s relationship. And this will enable Doms to partake in BDSM activities that have usually been reserved for bottoms. If there is a solid M/s dynamic, a relatively minor request such as “spank me” should not harm a good relationship. Master stays Master, slave – even if he/she doesn’t like spanking the Master – remains slave. (One should, however, discuss this beforehand and find out if being a spanker is a hard limit.)

But what if the Master wants to partake in more extreme activities that have traditionally been reserved for slaves or submissives? One such area is chastity. As anyone who has abstained from sex knows, orgasms after “time off” can be extremely pleasurable. In last week’s “Chastity For Everyone Part I,” I postulated in that the reason chastity play is gaining popularity – with many subs paying Pro-Dommes substantial fees to experience it – is because it is an orgasm magnifier; sex is a supremely powerful motivator. After all, we are hedonists and most lifestylers are constantly trying to find new and exciting ways to unleash a super orgasm. (For the purposes of this article, I will not cover the mental aspects of chastity play, such as humiliation.)

While asking a submissive to spank the Master is no big deal in the larger scheme of things, requesting your slave to “put this cock cage on me” would be a bridge too far for most Masters and slaves. Since the title of this article is “Chastity For Everyone,” how do we enable the Master to experience the extreme pleasure of chastity without his brain shorting out?

The answer, surprisingly, lies in the “Coors Light” principle. Herein, you sacrifice some taste for a less caloric beverage. A compromise. Realistically, true chastity play, especially one with humiliation and other verbal aspects mixed in, only works for slaves and submissives. Masters and Mistresses will simply miss out on full blown, extreme chastity play. But that is much the same as missing out on a Rolls Royce. Likely, I will not own one. But that does not mean I cannot enjoy a Lexus. Thus, to approximate some of the “super orgasmic” aspects of chastity play, the Master can design a “Chastity Light” scenario. (Of course, we are discussing those M/s unions where sex is an integral part.)

Obviously, the Master can devise “Chastity Light” play any way he desires. The easiest and most effective way is to avoid having sex with your slave for an extended period of time. You can do all the other BDSM scenes – even allowing your slave to cum with, say, a Hitachi. But whatever your natural point of self-abstinence and getting terminally horny is, go way past it. As the Master, you can push the envelope to whatever level you feel most comfortable with. After all, the beauty of this approach is that the Master makes the rules – even for self-chastity.

This is uncharted territory – and just one way to plan an adventure into chastity play for the Dom. The only limits are the hard limits of your slave and the limits of your imagination.

But experimenting with new and exciting play concepts is one of the best aspects of being in the BDSM world!

By BaadMaster
After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

Tagged With: bdsm, bondage, chastity, dynamic, gender roles

Primary Sidebar

Don’t miss out!

Get an email each week when new editions are online
We won't spam you, and you can
easily unsubscribe at any time

Sale – today only

Bondage kinks coffee mug

Put a smile on your face each morning

Support Kink Weekly on Patreon!

Become a Patron!

Help keep us online and get
epic good karma (and no ads)

Already a supporter? We love you! Visit here to enable ad-free browsing.

Get

Rubber coated clamps are great for sensual nipple play

 

Contribute

Want to feature your writing or photography on Kink Weekly? Are you an BDSM/sex expert or professional, and interested in being quoted in an article? Contact us

Archives

sexy blonde Domme with male submissive in straitjacket

Simple Mummification Fun!

By PirateStan Leave a Comment

Learn helpful mummification techniques in this week’s edition!

shibari male submissive bound

Why Excellent Submission Can Be Remarkably Illusive

By Ms. RikaLeave a Comment

Dive deep into submission with Ms. Rika in this week’s edition!

Footer

18 U.S.C. 2257 record keeping compliance statement
Always play
Safe Sane and Consensual

Copyright © 2023 · News Pro On Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in