It’s the Holiday season here at Kink Weekly. We have lately been featuring a series of articles on public play. But let’s take a New Year’s break. Enough of the serious BDSM; it’s time for some fun! (We will finish the “Public Play” series next year!!!)
As 2015 winds down to its inexorable close, we would like to wish all of our readers at Kink Weekly a Happy New Year. May 2016 be your best year ever!
In the past, I have made many New Year’s resolutions. Some I have kept, but most I have ignored. Still, I continue to make them, as I will this year. Keeping this in mind, I have compiled a list of twenty-one BDSM resolutions that are relatively easy to keep. Many were suggested by friends; others are of my own creation; some I can use to improve myself as a Dom. They are listed here in no particular order as a “sort-of” menu from which you and I can pick and choose a few. I have no intention of keeping all of them. But I think if we make – and keep — some of them, we will improve our BDSM life. So, without further adieu, the list!
1. Resolve to try a new BDSM scene regularly.
2. Resolve to buy a new BDSM toy once a month.
3. If you are a Dom/me, resolve to make your slave write a diary – whether regularly or only for a scene.
4. If you are a Dom/me, resolve to learn a new BDSM technique every other month.
5. If you are a submissive, resolve to learn how to better communicate with your Dominant.
6. Resolve to make regular playtime in spite of work and other demands on your life.
7. Resolve to read your slave contract regularly if you have one.
8. If you do not have a slave contract, resolve to make one.
9. If you are the Dom/me, resolve to push your sub’s limits from time-to-time.
10. If you are the Dom/me, resolve to listen to your submissive better.
11. Resolve to go to a BDSM play party at a local dungeon.
12. If you are the Dominant, resolve to ask your submissive to list his/her favorite BDSM activities and try to incorporate them into your play.(This is one long resolution!)
13. If you are the Dom/me, resolve to be a better one.
14. If you are the submissive, resolve to be a better sub.
15. Resolve to read at least one book about BDSM.
16. Resolve to discuss D/s deeply with a fellow lifestyler, in person or online.
17. Resolve to eliminate one habit your partner hates – such as smoking. (Borderline vanilla I must admit!)
18. If you don’t have a Dom/me or sub, resolve to be a better Dom/me or submissive when you meet a potential partner.
19. If you are a Dom/me, resolve to understand the deepest needs of your submissive.
20. If you are the submissive, resolve to learn the deepest needs of your Dominant.
21. Finally, resolve to go to the gym!!!
Some of these might not apply to your situation. But just making a few of these resolutions might focus your energy on improving your relationship – or giving you better tools to find one. I am sure you can think of other resolutions that pertain to your own circumstances.
If I prod you into making some BDSM New Year’s resolutions – rather than the standard ones (“I will not gamble on the Lakers,” “I will cut down on my smoking,” “I will stop yelling at the kids!”) – you might improve your BDSM life and thus have a better 2016. Which is what I wished you at the top of this article – that 2016 will be your best year ever!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.