Last week (click here for article), I briefly touched on how being a slave can reduce anxiety. This week, I would like to go further into this topic.
As I mentioned previously, my anxiety was one of the major reasons that we decided to enter into this kind of dynamic. I was afraid that without my Master’s complete control and guidance my anxiety would overtake me for the worst.
Because I know how scary anxiety can be, I genuinely want to give people tools that can help reduce their anxiety within the structure of M/S.
A few major anxiety relievers are the structure and routines our M/S relationship provides for me. Routines such as collaring me each morning, greeting my Master in a particular way, having set daily tasks, presenting dinner to him in a certain fashion etc. eliminates a lot of my anxiety. My anxiety stems mostly from fear of the unknown. So, having so many things in place I can depend on truly helps to lessen my anxiety’s hold on me.
I would encourage any Master who has a slave who suffers from anxiety to think about your schedule and your slave’s. After careful consideration of both schedules, put in a decent amount of structure and routines that the slave can rely on.
However, please also keep in mind that too much structure can make a slave become more anxious. Too much structure and routine can become overwhelming. Masters need to find a nice balance for their slaves between routine and free time (time where the slave can just be and do whatever they would like as long as it does not violate any of her/his rules).
The Sweet Spot
When implementing routines and structure, you need to find the “sweet spot” (where it helps keep the slave’s anxiety at bay, while not overwhelming them). Remember, all structure and routines must benefit the slave, Master, and the relationship in some way. Never give your slave tasks to do just to keep him or her busy. Slaves want to feel valuable.
The routines must also be realistic and be able to be done consistently. After all, the whole point of adding structure to your relationship is so both parties can have something they can depend on and look forward to.
If you find that a routine or piece of your dynamic’s structure isn’t working, schedule time with your partner(s) to sit down and come up with a new plan of action. The plan could be coming up with something new or tweaking what you already have established. Whatever you decide to do set a time that works well for all parties involved to discuss how these changes are working out.
I hope this has been helpful. Next week, I will talk about specific anxiety-reducing protocols. Please feel free to comment and ask questions. Thanks for reading and stay tuned!
About the Author:
Slave Bunny, a 1950’s power slave, is involved in a wonderful and loving TPE 24/7 M/S relationship with her Master and husband. She is also the Creative Director of Kink Weekly.
She has dedicated her life to working on herself mentally, spiritually, and physically, and hopes to inspire others to do the same. Through teaching and mentoring, she hopes to help everyone in the Kink community as much as she can.
Feel free to add her on Fetlife (Slave_Bunny992) to see her upcoming workshops and classes.