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Interview with Submissive Cupcake SinClair

October 15, 2018 By slave_bunny 3 Comments

Rico J Coria Photography

Can you tell us a little about your background and how you got your start in the Kink Community?

I was a bit of an introvert growing up and had more books than friends back in the day! One day, I stumbled across Marquis de Sade’s book “Justine” and  my curiousity was peaked! I did my research and never looked back. I went to munches, then play parties, and eventually was lucky enough to end up working at one of the dungeons I frequented.

Can you tell us what fulfills you most about being a professional submissive?

As cliché as it sounds, the ability to allow people to express parts of themselves they might have originally felt ashamed of, as well as being able to educate through communication and vulnerability.

What is the biggest challenge you face with your job?

Primarily, creating a space that allows people the ability to give themselves permission to just be. As a pro-sub, many of our clients tend not to be lifestylers (whether due to a busy job, or partner complications, etc). With this being said, allowing people the space to communicate their interests and desires in a healthy way can be a little tough because in our society opening up to people – especially to strangers-may seem like a daunting task. Before play, first and foremost, I strive to create an atmosphere where clients can feel free to express themselves if they allow me to do so.

Do you feel that pro submissives are more at risk safety-wise than pro Doms? What are some precautionary measures you always make sure to take?

I can only speak from my experience, and my experience in being a pro-submissive has always been within a specific dungeon I work at. At our dungeon, we always have a negotiation prior to actual play to establish one another’s limits and expectations of what will happen within play. During play, we use safe words if needed, the doors do not lock, and typically the receptionist will keep time of the sessions, and use an intercom system to give “last ten minute” notifications, which I have to verbally respond to as a check-in system. I can’t gauge risk overall because I personally have never felt at-risk, and it would be irresponsible for me to guess.

What are your specialties?

I’m a bit of a Jill-of-all-trades! My specialty is being so versed in kink personally that I am able to take on the energy my partner desires in a scene, make it my own, and have fun! Some have told me, however, that I stand out in the areas of Ageplay Roleplay (DDLG, and ABDL) as well as petplay, impact, and protocol.

Do you find that pro submissives are rarer than other kinds of professionals in the Kink Community?

That’s an interesting question! Within the Kink Community I don’t believe so. However, when dealing with those who may not be in the community, pro-submissives are definitely considered a rarity. Mainstream television is filled with portrayals, interviews, and scenarios about Dominatrixes, so, when I mention that I’m a pro sub (and that pro-switches exist) most people initially have a hard time wrapping their head around it!

Do your own fetishes factor into your work? If so, how?

Partially! I’m lucky enough to be a pretty versatile play partner. So, apart from about three hard limits, I’m typically able to take on the energy that a client wants from me, make it my own, and find it enjoyable! That being said, it’s also useful because if a client comes in who is apprehensive or simply uncertain about certain fetishes, I can add my personal experience of engaging in it to make the experience relatable, and hopefully encourage them to feel open enough to explore it together with me. It’s amazing how often people fantasize about fetishes, but may be scared to act them out once they find a willing partner in real life, and I feel grateful that I’m able to help people through it.

Are you a lifestyler as well? If so, how do you separate your work and private life? Do you identify as a submissive in your personal life?

I’m definitely a lifestyler, and I do identify as submissive all around! The only time I will ever really “top” is for educational purposes, or in videos when I have a specific idea and don’t have a top available. Submissive doesn’t necessarily mean doormat though!

In terms of separating what I do in my professional life, there isn’t much of a clear line. However, the most concrete example I can think of is through my play style. While I’m a versatile sub and genuinely enjoy playing off of my partner’s energy for scenes, I do personally enjoy rougher, more intense scenes that push my limits as a masochist. What I am talking about tends to involve blood, (one example being that my favorite toy is literally a barbed wire bat named Lucille), and usually includes psychological manipulation. This cannot happen in a professional scene. Another example may be that in professional sessions there is more of a regard for my client, their experience, and their catharsis over mine – whereas, in my personal play it may be the opposite.

What is the most fun aspect of your job?

Being able to facilitate a variety of fetishes in one day! It’s so much fun having clients come in, and going from fetish to fetish through the span of a work day! It never gets dull and I’m always on my toes.

What do you feel your clients gain from sessions with you? What is unique about what you can offer your clients?

As cliché as it sounds, I feel my clients can gain the confidence to explore and communicate their fetishes with their partners or by themselves. I suppose I am unique in that there’s not many fetishes or kinks that I’m not versed in. Because I’m a huge kinkster as well, I can happily provide the space for clients to become educated,  be encouraged, and feel comfortable enough to explore.

Do you feel you have grown personally from being a pro submissive? If so, how? Have your clients grown from sessions with you? If so, how?

Quite so! If clients learned from me and I learned nothing back it would be such a stagnant process. I feel I’ve personally grown in my ability to establish boundaries, communicate effectively, and facilitate negotiations that cover a wide basis in order to prepare both parties, and help create a more comfortable experience. And I hope that my clients learn the same, along with (if needed) how to safely engage in different aspects of BDSM play.

What would you say is the best advice you can offer those looking to be a pro submissive?

For those seeking to be a professional submissive, please have a gauge of what you are into as well as your limits. If you’re uncertain about certain areas of kink, don’t be afraid to speak up and acknowledge them when negotiating with a client – or if you’re able to try it on your own, do so! Not having a firm idea of your boundaries and interests not only does you a disservice, it does the client one as well!

What is the best advice you can give to those wanting to find a pro submissive?

Please be respectful of boundaries, and research the submissive you are interested in seeing! Just like every person, we all have our own unique specialties and limits, and are not one size fits all. That being said, while not always necessary, an idea of what you were hoping to experience always helps, so, when negotiating the submissive has a better idea of the scene, and is less likely to feel caught off guard. Also, don’t be afraid if you haven’t the slightest clue of what you want! It’s natural to be nervous, but rest assured there is a desire to help make your fetishes come to life as much as possible, and there is no judgement.

What do you love the most about working at Sanctuary?

The sense of family and closeness to community! I don’t have much of a bio family. Because of this, being able to have a chosen family that I can work, grow, and learn with is an opportunity I never would have dreamed of. It literally is a sanctuary!

How do your core values govern your professional and personal life concerning kink?

I go by two values:

The first is “The 4Cs” created by The Center for Positive Sexuality – “Consent, Communication, Caring, and Caution”

The second is more prevalent in the kink community and it is RACK – “Risk, Aware, Consensual, Kink”

Both of them are important and powerful values when combined. The 4Cs apply greatly to my professional kink work, while RACK is powerful for my personal kink life. In professional kink work, following the 4Cs can be a great guide in helping to enhance a scene and making it as meaningful as possible -with all parties aware of boundaries and needs while doing so.

What do you feel is the most important thing to remember concerning power exchange?

In my opinion, in a power exchange it is important to remember that Dominant does not mean asshole (unless consented to), and submissive does not mean doormat (unless consented to)! And even then, joking aside, those terms can be interpreted differently from person to person! Power exchanges can only take place when both parties give consent for it to occur, and are aware of one another’s expectations, boundaries, and needs while doing so.

Any closing words?

Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to share my perspective! If people are interested in seeing me in action, but are too far to play with me at Sanctuary Studios LAX, I have a kinky clip store that showcases a variety of  fetishes that I am into, along with things I may not be available to do in person (www.clips4sale.com/97659). I am also on twitter @subbie_cupcake! Thank you again for your time!


About Submissive Cupcake SinClair

Cupcake SinClair is a lifestyle and professional submissive of 5+ years at Sanctuary LAX, who has also participated in performance bottoming for fetish oriented parties (such as the monthly Club Anarchy Parties hosted by Sanctuary, DomCon LA 2015, and Threshold’s Kinky Valentine party). Whether it is heavy impact, an intense rope scene, role play, or service and high protocol oriented submission, she enjoys a wide variety of play that pushes and explores her limits, and particularly enjoys participating in community events to better learn about the diverse lifestyle she plays within.
Be sure to check out her website: https://cupcake-sinclair.wixsite.com/sinfullysweet

Tagged With: dom, power exchange, pro sub, sanctuary, sub, Submissive Cupcake SinClair

This week in kink: June 11, 2018

June 11, 2018 By Desdemona 4 Comments

hooper-crypto-120Dirk Hooper Professional Photography-http://www.dirkhooper.com/

Be sure to check out Dirk Hooper’s amazing photography in this week’s issue!


About Dirk Hooper

Dirk Hooper is an award-winning fetish photographer, professional writer, audiobook narrator, podcasting producer and host, journalist for the fetish community, BDSM mentor, and adult personal branding and marketing consultant for Sexy Networking.

 Dirk Hooper won Best Fetish Photographer at the 2017 Fetish Awards in St. Petersburg Florida. As a fine-art fetish photographer, Hooper’s work has been exhibited in England, the Netherlands, Belgium, China and all over the United States.  His work is part of the permanent collections of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and the Leather Archives and Museum in Chicago, Illinois. Dirk Hooper’s work has been published in magazines like Skin Two, Von Gutenberg, Fet Erotica and Sinical Magazine.  His work was published in the German hardcover art book “Fetish Fantasies: The Best of International Fetish Photography.” He has done professional photography for bands, books, posters and the adult film industry.  Hooper co-founded the alternative modeling site Toxic Goddess.  He offers his photography services for portraits and commercial projects.

 Hooper’s articles have recently been published at Business Insider, Inc. Magazine, HuffPost, Slate Magazine, The Sporting News, MSN Sport, and Quartz. He has won the Quora Top Writer award for the past two years. He has also been published as a comic writer, a poet, and performed numerous copywriting assignments for professional and private clients. He is currently working on an erotic novel and a non-fiction book about social networking.

Dirk Hooper is the Host and Executive Producer of “The Fetish Show.”  He has also recently launched a new podcast about success and inspiration titled, “The Dirk Side.” Hooper has been podcasting since 2005 and has produced hundreds of hours of shows over several networks. His first audiobook narration was for the Suzanne Steele novel “Glazov.”

  Dirk Hooper does journalism for the BDSM and fetish community through The Fetish Show News, FETISHWEEK articles, the Daily Fetish Chronicle and freelance writing.  Hooper’s award-winning website, http://www.DirkHooper.com features a gallery of his work, informational articles and is the home of “FETISHWEEK.”

 Hooper’s inspiration for his work is an extension of his interests and experience in the BDSM and fetish community.  He is a BDSM mentor and has helped guide or train both dominants and submissives.

 Hooper works as a consultant on personal branding, social networking, SEO, copywriting, design and marketing through his Sexy Networking business at http://SexyNetworking.com.


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New to kink? Not new but want to brush up on skills or just enjoy a play party with fresh energy?  CLUB AWAKENING is what you’re looking for!

Club Awakening is a party that was designed for newbies in the BDSM scene.  It’s been a monthly party since March 2016 at Sanctuary LAX. This party includes 4 set tasting booths plus one surprise booth each month.  The set booths are hands on play (spanking, face slapping, etc), crops/canes/paddles, flogging, and rope. You can either feel what these things feel like as a bottom or learn how to do these things as a Top – or both!  We even have several volunteer practice bottoms to lend a helping hand (aka butt) so you can practice even without a play partner. Other volunteers float the venue to answer questions and help point you in the right direction.

There are also 2-3 vendors and a midnight raffle – with multiple prizes to win!  We provide a coat and bag check for a nominal fee as well as a fun photo booth where you can get pics taken of you and your friends to commemorate the night!

You can get DISCOUNTED pre-sale tickets or pay at the door! (see below for links)

About the venue:

Sanctuary Studios LAX is proud to have been named “Best Dungeon in Los Angeles” by TimeOut Magazine – February 2016

Sanctuary LAX is a Los Angeles dungeon located within close proximity to LAX. It features a state of the art, air-conditioned facility completely rebuilt from the ground up under the direction of Mistress Cyan. Formerly known as Passive Arts, Sanctuary Studios LAX is the largest Dungeon in Los Angeles with more than 7000 sq ft. and a 1500 sq. ft. main room. The location features many rooms (both large and more intimate), high ceilings, and a large variety of dungeon furniture.  It is complete with an outdoor smoking patio and a stage in the main room with plenty of seating.

Facebook event page: https://www.facebook.com/events/617624521917307/

Fetlife Club Awakening Group page: https://fetlife.com/groups/138431

Fetlife event page: https://fetlife.com/events/670384

Pre-sale DISCOUNTED TICKETS: https://awakeningjune2018.eventbrite.com


Have some kinky news to share? Tell us about any upcoming BDSM events, new products, dungeon openings / closings, collarings, kink in mainstream media, and anything else you think kinky folks might be interested to hear about. Send your tips through to kinkweekly@gmail.com, and it might just end up on next week’s “This Week in Kink”

Tagged With: Club Awakening, Dirk Hooper, dom, gender, jenn masri, kinky sex, power exchange, sanctuary, Sex Work Community, sex workers, sub

Mistress Cyan Holds “Slave Auction” Toy and Food Drive Press Release

December 4, 2017 By kinkweekly Leave a Comment

cyanstoydrive1

Mistress Cyan Holds “Slave Auction” Toy and Food Drive

Los Angeles, CA – Friday, December 8th, Mistress Cyan will be warming the holidays and a lot of butts with her annual “Slave Auction”  toy drive for charity.

The party is a kinky take on the classic bachelor auction. Volunteers put themselves up for auction for the night. Those bringing in a new toy for children, canned food, or dry goods get play money to bid on the “slaves” for the evening. Winning bidders get to play with their new toys for the night. Everything is negotiated, consensual and for fun.

Last month’s food drive and auction for Thanksgiving brought in over $5,000 worth of donated food. Hand trucks and dollies were required to bring in the bulk goods which were stacked onstage. Blankets, gift cards and cash donations are also accepted. Food, blankets, and monetary donations go The Metropolitan Community Church in North Hollywood, which then distributes the goods to shelters and the homeless for the holidays. Toy donations go to the Toys for Tots program, which distributes them to needy children.

“We would like to invite all our friends in kink and leather to join us this year and contribute to the needy in Los Angeles, said Mistress Cyan. “Last year, we collected over 2000 cans of food and more than 200 pounds of dry goods, as well as cash and gift cards to distribute for Christmas. Let’s try and surpass that this year.  It’s all for a good cause and good kinky fun!”

Doors open at 8:00 P.M. at Sanctuary LAX, 10914 S. La Cienega Blvd., across from the Los Angeles Airport. Admission for the party is $20. Dress code for the night is fetish, leather, or classy casual. No cut offs or baseball caps please.

For more details, go to https://sanctuarylax.com/events/475

###

About Mistress Cyan:
Mistress Cyan is most well known as the founder and organizer of the BDSM Conventions DomCon Los Angeles and DomCon New Orleans. She produces The Lair at Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. She recently has been appointed to the committee for LA Gay Pride Festival in West Hollywood to organize their “Erotic City” zone. She also runs Sanctuary LAX, one of the largest dungeons in Southern California.
Twitter: @MistressCyan
Instagram: @SanctuaryStudiosLAX
Fetlife: @MistressCyan, @Sanctuary_LAX
www.SanctuaryLAX.com

Tagged With: Mistress Cyan, press release, sanctuary, sanctuary lax

Sanctuary LAX Presents Sanctuary Marketplace and Charity “Slave Auction”

November 6, 2017 By kinkweekly Leave a Comment

sanctuarymarketplace

Los Angeles, CA – Southern California’s largest dungeon presents the Sanctuary Marketplace, and charity “Slave Auction” party, Saturday, November 11th, at Sanctuary LAX, 10914 S. La Cienega Blvd.

From 11:00 A.M. to 6:00 P.M. is the Sanctuary Marketplace, organized by Master Gabriel and House of RayvnBlood. This special annual event features one of a kind  and handmade products by local craft people and artisans in the BDSM community. Goods range from bondage gear and leather clothing to handmade paddles, artwork, and novelties.

Vendors at Sanctuary Marketplace this year include, Orchid and Serpent, Laced Up Corsets, Ghoul Vibrations, Geeky and Kinky pins, Anticipation USA, American Ruin, Mistress Evil, Aron the Canemaker, Naughty’s Proper Paddles, Kim Air’s Grand Opening, and much more. In addition, there will be live, on-stage BDSM performances.

At 8:00 P.M. is Mistress Cyan’s “Slave Auction” charity food drive and fund raiser for the homeless in Southern California. This pervy take on the charity Bachelor Auction is a Sanctuary tradition dating back over 20 years. Submissives volunteer to put themselves up for auction, while “buyers” exchange non-perishable food and canned goods for “auction money.” Bidding starts at about 9:30 P.M. and the winning bidders keep the “slave” for the duration of the party. This is for fun, everything is negotiated, consensual and all safewords will be respected.

“This is a great event for a really great cause,” said Mistress Cyan of Sanctuary LAX. “I hope you will all consider either attending or participating. Last year, we collected over 2000 cans of food and more than 200 pounds of dry goods, as well as cash and gift cards to distribute for Thanksgiving. Let’s try and surpass that this year !!! The beneficiaries of the food and blankets are The Metropolitan Community Church in North Hollywood. The food and blankets are then distributed to food banks and the needy all over Southern California.”

Admission for Sanctuary Marketplace is $10, free to veterans and active duty personnel with Military I.D. For more details, go to www.sanctuarymarketplace.com.

Admission for Mistress Cyan’s charity “Slave Auction” party is $20 at the door. Dress code for the night is fetish, leather, or classy casual. No cut offs or baseball caps please. For more details, go to http://losangeleskink.com/events/mistress-cyans-thanksgiving-slave-auction-2

Tagged With: Mistress Cyan, sanctuary, slave auction

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