Kink Weekly

BDSM articles ideas bondage erotica resource

submissive

A Deeper BDSM Experience Awaits You, Outside Your Comfort Zone

By 6 Comments

Illustration by Dirk Hooper

I hear from people with very different problems, but all share the same solution.

One guy is into FinDom, and deeply enjoys the interaction he gets online, but then feels a profound sense of loneliness afterward. He thinks he knows about BDSM, but, he’s only had a small taste of it.

A woman has practiced professional domination, enjoys it, and wants to be an amazing Domme. She’s also interested in the lifestyle component. But her research hasn’t answered any of the questions that she has, and she’s having a hard time learning the ropes, so to speak.

Another woman hangs out on Fetlife and reads a library full of books, but still can’t put it all together in her head. Plus, she’s looking for the right partner and all she’s finding is a bunch of guys who want one night stands instead of a real relationship.

So, what do all these people have in common?

They all need to get out from behind a computer screen, their cell phone, or get their nose out of a book, and find a local BDSM group.

Look, I know all the reasons why you’re not attending the local BDSM group,

Maybe you’re shy,

Maybe you’re scared, and it all looks a little weird,

Maybe you live in a small town and you must travel a little bit to find the local group,

Or maybe you’re busy.

I’ve had all those reasons and many more to not go to a local BDSM group. I get it. I really do. It’s so much easier to dig around on the Internet or lose yourself in books, but the fact is that connecting the dots, seriously putting it all together, comes from real life, hands-on, experience.

Now, before I go any further, I want to state unequivocally that you’re not required by law to attend BDSM group or a kink event. If you don’t do this, it doesn’t make you any less valid of a kinky person. Some people will meet a special person and will discover everything they need to know together, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

It’s also possible that the fantasy of all of this or just playing in individual scenes is exactly what you’re looking for. That’s okay too.

But, if you’re the type of person who feels this deep inside and knows in their heart that there must be more out there… more knowledge, more connection, more passion, then there is an answer for you. Find a local BDSM group, or an event, and take the plunge.

There are so many things that a local group or a BDSM event are going to do for you.

Real-Life Play

One of the great things about BDSM play parties is getting the opportunity to watch couples conduct their scenes. Everyone has their own dynamic and their own style. You’re going to get a smorgasbord of unique scenes, different players, various toys, and more importantly, you’re going to see how this looks in reality.

The first time I went to play party it was at an upscale home filled with all sorts of kinky people. Even if I didn’t play that first night (I did) it opened my eyes to the vast difference between what you see in porn videos and in movies, versus what happens in a real kinky scene. Every room was like a different channel with a different show playing.

It was a crash course in kinky play. And worth far more than all the books, magazines, and videos I had consumed previously.

There’s another obvious bonus to experiencing real-life play and that’s the opportunity to participate yourself. I played on that first night and it was exhilarating. Some of the things I learned that night I still use to this day. It’s a valuable experience.

Asking Questions

At a BDSM event, you can follow up on what you’ve just seen by asking the participants questions.

Always be incredibly respectful of people in a scene or who are practicing aftercare. Don’t disturb them while they are interacting with each other.

But when things have cooled down, or maybe while they’re putting away toys, if you approach people and ask questions in a respectful manner, most people will be happy to pass on their wisdom.

Often when I’m asking questions about toys or technique or how people feel they will do much more than just tell me. People will frequently allow me to inspect a whip or toy they used. Some will go as far as teaching me how to use an item or demonstrate it on me.

Much of the deeper learning that I have is directly related to speaking to people who have just played and are doing something that interests me.

It frequently leads to friendships, connections, and sometimes mentors, which leads to my next section.

Friendships, Connections, and Mentors

Most people imagine that BDSM events are like Eyes Wide Shut. Sure, there are some events that are like that, but most are a lot more like a science fiction convention.

People go throughout their entire life with this secret interest. It’s likely they don’t share this secret with their friends, family, or coworkers. In fact, they’re probably fighting as hard as they can to keep it away from those exact people.

At a BDSM event, you’re finally surrounded by people who understand what you’re going through. They all have a similar story. And this is their chance to speak openly about what they’re into. It’s liberating. But it’s also a very powerful opportunity for you to meet like-minded people.

That’s one of the reasons why people are so willing to speak to you about their tools and methods. Submissives can be particularly forthcoming about their feelings in a scene. If you’re respectful and inquisitive you can learn so much just by asking a few questions.

Your interactions could easily lead to new friendships, important connections, and maybe even a mentor if that something that you’re interested in.

Those relationships are incredibly valuable to you because they may give you the only outlet you have to talk about this kinky stuff.

Meet A Romantic Partner

While I don’t think making a romantic connection should be your first priority at a BDSM group, there are some distinct advantages to meeting someone in this setting.

You’re going to get a chance to talk with them at length about what they’re into. You can tell if there’s real chemistry between the two of you. You might even get a chance to see them play or play with them in a safe environment.

Also, you’re surrounded by people who may know more about the person you’re interested in. You can get some firsthand knowledge about who this person is, what their history is, and whether they can be trusted or not.

In fact, you could use a BDSM group as a place to meet someone that you’ve met online. Again, you’re going to be surrounded by people who know what they’re doing and are going to be looking out for you better than if you met one-on-one in a private location.

Demonstrations

Most BDSM groups offer classes or seminars on just about every aspect of BDSM that you can imagine.

I don’t care how many YouTube videos that you watch, it’s not the same as seeing it and experiencing it in real life.

You’re going to be right there. You can ask questions, get a better view, or play along with whatever is happening.

It’s going to be better than any class you took in high school!

It’s Fun!

The best reason of all to go to a BDSM group or event is that it’s simply fun. There’s so much that goes on at these things that you can never imagine. Each group and each event is going to be totally different. Once you go, you’re going to be hooked!

It’s possible that you find a group that’s not a good fit for you. Try again with another group. They all have their unique pros and cons.

If you’re interested in a deeper knowledge or a more passionate understanding of BDSM nothing beats real-life experience.

Even if you’re antisocial, you have to travel a bit, or you’re a little nervous, I can promise you that it is worth getting outside of your comfort zone and making the extra effort to connect with the community.

About the Author

Dirk Hooper is an award-winning fetish photographer, professional writer, audiobook narrator, podcasting producer and host, journalist for the fetish community, BDSM mentor, and adult personal branding and marketing consultant for Sexy Networking.

Dirk Hooper won Best Fetish Photographer at the 2017 Fetish Awards in St. Petersburg Florida. As a fine-art fetish photographer, Hooper’s work has been exhibited in England, the Netherlands, Belgium, China and all over the United States.  His work is part of the permanent collections of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and the Leather Archives and Museum in Chicago, Illinois. Dirk Hooper’s work has been published in magazines like Skin Two, Von Gutenberg, Fet Erotica and Sinical Magazine.  His work was published in the German hardcover art book “Fetish Fantasies: The Best of International Fetish Photography.” He has done professional photography for bands, books, posters and the adult film industry.  Hooper co-founded the alternative modeling site Toxic Goddess.  He offers his photography services for portraits and commercial projects.

Hooper’s articles have recently been published at Business Insider, Inc. Magazine, HuffPost, Slate Magazine, The Sporting News, MSN Sport, and Quartz. He has won the Quora Top Writer award for the past two years. He has also been published as a comic writer, a poet, and performed numerous copywriting assignments for professional and private clients. He is currently working on an erotic novel and a non-fiction book about social networking.

Dirk Hooper is the Host and Executive Producer of “The Fetish Show.”  He has also recently launched a new podcast about success and inspiration titled, “The Dirk Side.” Hooper has been podcasting since 2005 and has produced hundreds of hours of shows over several networks. His first audiobook narration was for the Suzanne Steele novel “Glazov.”

Dirk Hooper does journalism for the BDSM and fetish community through The Fetish Show News, FETISHWEEK articles, the Daily Fetish Chronicle and freelance writing.  Hooper’s award-winning website, http://www.DirkHooper.com features a gallery of his work, informational articles and is the home of “FETISHWEEK.”

Hooper’s inspiration for his work is an extension of his interests and experience in the BDSM and fetish community.  He is a BDSM mentor and has helped guide or train both dominants and submissives.

Hooper works as a consultant on personal branding, social networking, SEO, copywriting, design and marketing through his Sexy Networking business at http://SexyNetworking.com.

Rules

By 2 Comments

Rules, I LOVE rules. Long lists of complicated instructions relating to everything from when they can speak to what furniture they are allowed to sit on, or short simple ones like always wearing their collar when we play. There are so many to choose from, and as with so many things in kink they are only limited by your imagination. When we set rules is it because we actually want them to be followed? Are we setting unachievable goals so that the bottom cannot help but eventually fail? Are the rules designed to eventually become patterns of unthinking behaviour, effectively training the bottom?

So let me start by narrowing the topic, here we are talking about rules that are supposed to be followed, not play rules that are fun to break or challenge. The rules we are discussing are those most often found in long term D/s dynamics.

What these rules end up being, the punishments agreed upon if the are broken, where they are enforced, all of this is just the beginning.

We can often mistake rules as being only about control. A way for the top to exercise their desire and dominance over another person, when physically there or not. However, I believe rules can be far more than that. First we need to decide what the objective of the rules are and where they are enforced. Then we can explore how rules can build trust and bring the top and bottom closer together.

I believe that rules are about trust. Because of that they need to come from a positive place. They need to be rules that genuinely make the top happy, and that improve the bottom in ways you both want, even if that is just in making them a better bottom. When I set a rule it is always with the objective of developing the bottom. Small rules can set the foundation for much greater changes.

Rules can be contextual or temporal, existing perhaps only in the bedroom, or on kinky weekends.

Rules can exist in perpetuity, even if they only are acted upon in a certain environment.

Rules can be omnipresent, forming the foundation for patterns of behaviour which stretch from the bedroom to the workplace and every corner of life.

Whatever rules you settle on they are not just about control, they are also about trust. As a top it is vitally important that you treat the rules with respect. You imbue them with all their power by enforcing them, fail to enforce them and the rules are meaningless.

Consider a bottom who has studiously been following the rules of a long distance relationship, and let us imagine that rule is to send the top a picture of them in their underwear every morning when getting ready for work. For three weeks, without fail, they have sent a picture, posed and considered to their top. Then one morning the alarm doesn’t go off! In the frantic rush that follows the photo is forgotten and it isn’t until the evening that they remember. An apologetic message is sent immediately, explaining the situation and begging forgiveness. Then the Top replies saying that they hadn’t remembered and that it is okay, they understand and it is fine.

What an incredibly underwhelming response!

For three weeks the bottom has been mindful, considerate and obedient. Let us not forget that it can be hard work as well, spending that extra time every day fulfilling the wishes of another person. With one act of nonchalant dismissal the Top has devalued all that hard work. What bottom would want to go though that again?

How much more exciting is it for the bottom to receive a text as they rush to work, a simple threatening question: “Where is my photo?” Adrenalin starts to flow, the delightful panic of knowing that punishment is impending, the fear of failure and the reassurance that the Top is always thinking about the bottom, monitoring them, aware of their actions and failures. We can easily focus on the surface emotions of that moment; fear, a sense of failure, impending doom. However, we shouldn’t forget the greater affirming impact on the relationship. The reminder that the Top is dedicated to the bottoms development, thinking about them, aware of their actions.

Isn’t this a more fulfilling response? I think so.

A rule should be rewarded when followed, and punished when defied.

A reward should be tailored to the bottom. Some only require a simple “Well done!” others need a reward chart with a big reward at the end. But most often the reward is recognition. It should be carefully balance though, not to over reward or under-appreciate. A rule should exist with a certain expectation of obedience and so giving praise for something that hasn’t actually been hard devalues the Top’s praise. However, no praise at all is demotivating.

Learn your bottom, give as much consideration to a “Well done!” as you would a spanking. Plan a big reward with as much care as you would a 6 hour beating scene. The reward part of the rule is just as important as the punishment part, both reinforce the value of the rule.

Punishments give a rule value, the higher the punishment the more important the rule. We should intrinsically know this, it is why murder gets life in prison and jaywalking a fine. But these are detached, we commit the infraction against a ethereal entity, society, but breaking a rule in a D/s dynamic is personal. You are breaking my rule. So here we can choose to punish even the smallest infraction in a most severe manner. We are punishing not just violation of the rule but the rebellion or forgetfulness which caused the rule to be broken.

I should highlight here that when I talk about punishing the infringement of a rule, I do not suggest you be merciless. We live in the real world, things go wrong, people get upset, things are forgotten for good reason. Depending on the circumstances a punishment might well not be appropriate or deserved, but I strongly suggest it is highlighted. Let them know it is not forgotten, but it is forgiven because of the situation. In this way a potentially upsetting situation can become another chance to show care and attention.

Rules are great fun, and if you want they can run deep through the very core of a D/s relationship. If that is what you want then they reward consideration, planning and forethought, but treat them casually and they can turn on you. Rules are not for the lazy Top, because unlike the bottom we don’t have anyone holding a stick over us to make us respect them.

About the Author

Will Hunt has been involved in the UK kink scene for the last 10 years; running clubs, teaching workshops, performing and generally encouraging naughty behavior wherever possible.

The Misunderstandings of Littles

By 7 Comments

Pure Rebel – https://www.patreon.com/purerebel
The Dark Arts-https://darkestarts.com/

I was still finding myself when I met my Daddy.

Correction.  I hadn’t even begun trying to find the self I had lost when I met him, yet he inspired me to begin that journey.

Along the way, he pointed out to me that I had some of the tendencies of littles.  Having read very little about people who identify that way, but finding those things to be negative, I rejected that possibility for myself.  It was only after I did some more reading and spent some time being honest with myself that I was able to accept that part of me.  I have met others along the way who struggled similarly with their preconceived notions of littles and thus fought against their desires for things such as pacifiers.

I genuinely cannot count the number of times people have become friends of mine and at some point remarked casually at how they hadn’t known someone who was a little before.  They often go on to describe characteristics which are often associated with littles, such as brattiness and childishness, and express distaste with those traits, but pleasure that I am “not like that.”  The conversation usually moves on, leaving me with that hint of sadness that one of my identifiers is so widely misinterpreted.

For a portion of society who preaches about tolerance and not judging one another, I see an awful lot of misconceptions about subgroups in our community.  Perhaps the only experience some has had was with a little in a forum, or seen from across the room at a play party, all in pink stomping a foot and emphatically saying no.  This trend towards treating littles somewhat dismissively tends to hit me hardest where I live, as these things often do.  Rather than seeing those of us who identify in this category as whole, healthy individuals who have embraced their inner child, they are often seen as annoying, with much misconception. However, I see it in the case of “littles,” so let’s talk about us!

There are at least three large categories within the “little” heading.  Littles, middles, and babygirls are often grouped together.  So let’s break it down.

Littles often, but not always, identify that way because they have an age regression.  This can be a state of mind for them which is sometimes situational.  It can sometimes be referred to as little space in discussion.  This age regression is different for every person who experiences it.  Some people will identify an age they feel they regress to, others will have a range.  For the most part littles tend to identify on the lower end of the age spectrum, generally under age 10, taking on characteristics of those age groups.

This may mean your little wants to have a pacifier, or takes comfort in stuffies.  It may mean games of Candyland or coloring.  It could mean Disney movies, a system of reward and punishment, or the endearment good girl being a thrill.  It may mean they do not want sexual contact while in their age regressed state.

It does not mean that people who identify this way are incapable of taking care of themselves.  It also does not mean they act like children all of the time.  There are generally specific things which will trigger age regression for them, and may require them to feel comfortable and safe with the people around them.  That generally doesn’t occur during the work day or with just anyone.

Middles generally identify in the middle of the age spectrum, somewhere from 11 and up.  Again, some may experience age regression and some may not.  They may or may not enjoy some of the more childlike things like coloring and stuffies and may be more open to sexual contact while in this mindset.

Babygirls often do not identify with age regressive experiences, yet strongly desire to fully integrate their inner children with their adult experiences.  They may enjoy some of the same activities that littles and middles do without necessarily needing them or being restricted to one age bracket.

Confusion can come because all three subcategories can exhibit similar outward characteristics.  Individuals identifying in these manners can often project a certain level of naivety or innocence in some form, whether it exists or is simply a projection of childlike innocence.  Generally all three groupings are seeking a Daddy or Mommy relationship with an individual who is often, but not necessarily, older in chronological age and who guides the pairing.  This partnership can provide mentoring in areas which may be less developed in the submissive partner, or simply provide emotional fulfilment.

The important thing to remember when dealing with anyone who identifies in any of these ways is that they are still adults who are perfectly capable of rational and intelligent thought.  They shouldn’t have to hide their identifier out of fear of misconception or ridicule as I have seen some do.  This community should be as inclusive as it claims to be.  We should offer all those we meet an opportunity to educate us about areas of kink we were previously unfamiliar with, and perhaps learn a little about ourselves in return.

About the Author

Christmas bunny has been exploring kink since she was legal to do so.  Her serious writing started in college, where she accidently got some of her papers published in educational journals.  She has recently expanded her writing to include her kink journey.  She began writing in the physical realm, but shed some of her inhibitions and began sharing those entries with others.  She now keeps an active blog of her personal growth and her relationship with her Master / Daddy Dominant and writes helpful educational posts on a variety of subjects.

On My Knees: Part 2

By 3 Comments

Dominatrix: Mercenary Mistress
Photographer: Danny Stygion
Corset: FetCraft
MUA: Texas Dela Rosa
Shoes: Refuse To Be Usual
Location: Austin Dungeon

For Part 1 Click Here

We got up to the top floor of the hotel and Master instructed me to get on my knees by His hotel room door and He led me into the room by the leash on all fours. “Take off all of your clothes and show me your favorite position of submission” He ordered and I obeyed Him. I made sure to slowly take off my clothes so that He could take me in part by part.

My eyes were transfixed on His, not as a sign disrespect, but of the utmost respect and connection. When I was naked, I got on my knees and put my hands behind my head, hands clasped, back straight, chest out, eyes down.  It hurt not to look at Him in the eyes,  but I wanted to show Him complete submission. “Beautiful. Just beautiful” He said as He began to photograph me with His phone camera.

He went behind me and stood there for a few minutes. I waited patiently. “You have a beautiful body, Juliette” He told me as He grabbed the leash and pulled my neck back so I would look up at Him. He smiled at me and took my left breast into His hand, squeezed my nipple, played with it and stretched it out as far as it would go. He then took my right breast and did the same thing. “Whose tits are these?” He asked calmly. “They are yours, Master. I am all yours” I responded eagerly. He playfully slapped them, took His dick out of his pants and rubbed it all over my breasts but especially over my nipples. My nipples became hard in no time.

With my arms still behind my head, and my mind completely on wanting to obey, I stayed in my position as He continued to tease me with His dick. He guided my head down to watch his every move. His dick was fully erect. He then told me to stand and I did I was instructed to do. Hands behind my head still, He went behind me and took my arms and put them behind my back and made me stand there while He went through the suitcase He had left in his room earlier and suddenly I felt the cold metal of handcuffs surrounding my wrists. I loved the sound they made as He made them get tighter around each wrist.

He laid me down gently on my stomach, head down on the bed while my feet were on the floor. He went back to his suitcase. He came back to me and rolled a metal bar slowly down my back, onto my ass, and down my legs. It was then I realized He bought a spreader bar to use for me. I happily spread my legs wide for Him so that He could restrain me with it.

For the first time, I was completely at the mercy of a Master. It was also my first time being restrained by a spreader bar and with arms behind my back. Master began to finger me from behind, occasionally stopping to smack my ass with His dick, playfully. He went to His suitcase and suddenly I felt lube on my asshole. As one finger entered my ass, His dick began to enter my pussy. This was all for His pleasure, not mine, as I cum only from clitoral stimulation. He fucked me nice and slow while He fingered my asshole at the same pace. Then He took His finger out of my ass and replaced it with His dick. I hadn’t been fucked in my ass in years so it was a little painful at first but then He rubbed my clit while He fucked my ass and I came nice and hard. He could feel my vaginal walls clench despite being in my ass at the time. It was the first time anyone made me cum that way. He handled me like a pro.

I was left in awe of Him.

When He was done, He left me there to wait while he took a shower. I imagined what He looked like naked and thought about our elevator fun while I waited. When He came out, He was only in a towel and He went to the side of the bed to make sure I knew it. His shoulders were as sculpted and strong looking as they were in the pictures I saw of Him. His body was very attractive to me, even though parts of Him were covered by a towel. He was always gorgeous to me but seeing Him like that was a total turn on. I saw the outline of his dick in the towel and my pussy couldn’t stop pulsating. He unshackled my legs and told me what a good girl I was for laying there all quiet in the room while He showered. He instructed me to take a bath and then rinse off in the shower. I did as I was told. In the bath, He made sure to tease me. He watched as I soaked myself up with body wash all over my breasts, pussy and ass. His dick got stiff in the towel as I slowly played with my nipples and jiggled my breasts playfully for Him. He came over every once in awhile to play with a nipple or put His hand in the bath water and play with my clit. He was so good at teasing.

When I was out of the bath and shower, He told me to get on the bed. He had another surprise for me. He took out a sexy purple nightgown in my size. He then took off his towel and, to make me laugh, pretended to put the nightgown on but then quickly told me to raise my arms up and He dressed me like I was His doll. I am His doll. I stayed in my position on the bed with my beautiful new nightgown on, taking in the sight of my Master. His body in totality is delicious. He laid on the bed next to me and told me to get in between His legs and blow Him. I happily began to lick the head of his dick then put it in my mouth. I concentrated first on the head and then moved my way down and choked a little on His cock. He watched me the whole time, giving me little instruction as He already knew I knew what I was doing. I took His dick in and out of my throat for a few minutes and then rubbed it with my hand while I licked His balls. “Oh yes, Juliette. That’s it. Lick my balls” He demanded and I continued. His dick was rock solid. He took control for a second and slapped my face with it. “Spit on my cock you slut” He commanded and I spit as much as I could. He took His dick and rubbed it all over my face. I enjoyed every minute of it but put my eager tongue out to let Him know I wanted more.

He got up, told me to lay on the bed on my back with my head at the edge of the bed. “Mouth open, tongue out” He urged and I listened. He then slapped my tongue a few times with His dick before putting it all the way in my mouth. He fucked my throat with vigor and told me what a good little subby slut I was. He reached forward and rubbed my clit as he fucked my face. It was like no other sexual experience I have ever had before. Within minutes He and I came at the same time. It was incredible. That night He had me sleep at His feet, with His feet using me as a foot rest, right where I belong.

About the Author

Mistress Rayvyn is a 37 year old native New Yorker who has been in the lifestyle for 20 years. Her hobbies include photography, singing, writing, reading, talking to people from around the world on various messengers, cooking, baking, and playing rpgs of all kinds.

She only started writing BDSM erotica a year ago, but has been writing poetry and fictional stories since she was 14 years old. While her BDSM stories are fictional, they are comprised of the fetishes she and her following have. Some stories are catered to specific people in her life, others are fantasies of her own. She hopes to continue to build her following and get some constructive feedback along the way.

Relationship Dynamics

By 2 Comments

Dominatrix: Mercenary Mistress
Photographer: Danny Stygion
Corset: FetCraft
MUA: Texas Dela Rosa
Shoes: Refuse To Be Usual
Location: Austin Dungeon

Relationship dynamics are so very individual.  Vanilla or kink, everyone has to develop their own working model.  The funny thing is that if you google the words “relationship dynamic definition,” you get a bunch of articles and book recommentations, but no actual definition.  I thought I’d take a stab at it.

Relationship:

noun
  1. the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.
  2. The way in which two or more people or organizations regard and behave toward each other.

Dynamic:

adjective
  1. (of a process or system) characterized by constant change, activity, or progress.
noun
  1. a force that stimulates change or progress within a system or process.

Using the dictionary as our foundation, then, we can create a better definition than just waving our hands about to encompass BDSM and talking mystically about our dynamics, expecting others to nod along.  I argue we can define it thus:

Relationship dynamic:

  1. the way in which two or more people are connected and behave toward each other, characterized by constant change or progress.

I really like the part that implies that relationships are constantly growing and adapting, because that’s definitely how I see it.  The question then becomes how does one find the mythical “relationship dynamic” and wht kinds of dynamics can one build?

Obviously, the most common relationship structure that gets attention in Kink is that of a Dominant / submissive pairing, though polyamorous structures are possibly even more common.  I also tend to see quite a bit of literature on structuring Master / slave relationships.  Any of the relationships we build in the Kink Community can be as sexual or non-sexual as the participants desire.

The things we don’t tend to see as much of are pairings such as Handler / pet or even Daddy / little or middle or babygirl, Stag / vixen, and a host of other possible combinations.  Perhaps because I’ve been looking I have seen more informative writings about those types of relationships lately, though they have required me to search with more deliberation to find them.  It gets even more interesting when we begin to combine elements from different areas of kink into one relationship dynamic.  Perhaps an individual identifies as a submissive but also a primal prey.  It is easier to find a match in a Dominant Primal Hunter than when someone identifies in ways which seem conflicting.

Those large categories can often carry some societal assumptions, even within our more open-minded community.  Think for a moment of the word submissive.  We often make some broad generalizations about an individual who identifies that way.  We assume that person must either accept pain or be a masochist along with that submission, but those things don’t have to go together.

What happens to someone who clearly identifies as submissive bottom but who is also a sadist?  Does this person require poly structures to get what they want, since the likelihood of finding a Dominant masochist is smaller, or hold out hope of finding everything they need in one partner?  That is a decision only that person can make, but it reminds us that even broad categories can be confining.

It can become even more challenging when an individual identifies in more than two categories.  I identify as a babygirl, but also as a submissive and as a slave / property.  Finding a Daddy Domiant / Master was quite a challenge.  For me, though, the rewards of being able to develop a relationship dynamic which feeds more of what I need was well worth the effort it took to discover and develop it.

I get a lot of questions from people who are wanting to develop similar structures, or even other types of less common combinations, but are unsure how.  Prehaps they have read something I wrote and notice that I tend to swap back and forth between terms of address for my Dominant, and they are left with quesrions.  We are often faced with people who want others to be only one thing, to be more easily categorized.  That may work well for some, but there are many of us who don’t feel one category adequately describes either us or the relationships we build.  Sometimes it helps to look to others who have built similar structures and engage them in dialogue.  The one piece of advice I can offer is this.

Time.

There’s a song about time and patience.  Unfortunately, for those of us who want to build any relationship, we have to start from the ground up.  From individuals who only want a relationship which falls into one category to those who want theirs to span several, they all require participants to clearly communicate both their desires and their needs for the relationship.  Those things may be different, and deciding if something is a need vs a want can be challenging.

Once each individual has determined their needs and wants, they should communicate those to one another.  I find sitting with a written list can help ensure I’m not forgetting anything I felt was important enough to discuss.  I have a tendency to bunny trail a bit…

After having communicated, the relationship can be adjusted to accommodate those agreed-upon aspects, as well as to see what is working and what isn’t.  Perhaps it may even include adding additional elements that had been on the “want” portion of the list but which have transitioned to the “need” portion.  Those things rarely remain static in an individual, let alone a pairing or poly grouping.  This can be similar to a renegotiation, and may involve sitting down with lists again for a conversation, or can be as simple as a few words of agreement as an aspect comes up and requires attention.

I firmly believe that one of the most important characteristics of a healthy long-term relationship dynamic is fluidity.  The ability to adjust to the changes and emergencies life can often bring may make the difference in the longevity of the partnership.

Like any other structure, such as homes or boats, building a relationship dynamic requires time and effort to create something which will not crumble when stormy weather assails it.

About the Author

Christmas bunny has been exploring kink since she was legal to do so.  Her serious writing started in college, where she accidently got some of her papers published in educational journals.  She has recently expanded her writing to include her kink journey.  She began writing in the physical realm, but shed some of her inhibitions and began sharing those entries with others.  She now keeps an active blog of her personal growth and her relationship with her Master / Daddy Dominant and writes helpful educational posts on a variety of subjects.

How About A Little Personal Responsibility Here?

By 2 Comments

I am going to start this off by dispelling some rumors, and I am sure people may get upset with me, but oh well. So be it. We all came to like kink because we “Chose” to participate. I know, what a concept, right?

I know you are all nodding your heads right now. Now, here is where I get myself into trouble. Whatever role you decided to be was a “Choice”. Don’t make me bold it and use all caps (because I will). Seriously though, we choose almost everything we do here in this thing called life.

So, why do so many people shuck their personal responsibility like it wasn’t a choice to do so?People choose to go to munches, dungeons, play parties, gatherings, and other events. Now, I want to make this clear so nobody gets picky on me. There are plenty of terrible individuals out there that do terrible things to people who are unsuspecting, new, naive, or oblivious. With this being said, I don’t hold those who are victimized responsible for the actions of the horrible individuals who exhibited predatory behavior. There will always be terrible people out there; try your best to avoid them.

Lately, I have been hearing a lot of people over the last few years say, “I have a slave heart” or “I am truly DOMINANT and a Master/Mistress.” Ok, this maybe true, but in both instances the people involved chose to partake in these roles. The person who says they have a slave heart, what do you mean? Does this mean you want serve everyone all the time? Is this what you would like to choose? If it is and that is what you enjoy, then awesome, but own it. If you are truly DOMINANT, who is choosing to let you dominant them? Just because you say these things means nothing unless someone is willing to give up their power to feed into yours. When this does occur, are they really giving up complete control? In my opinion, in most instances, people should be able to still say NO or better yet Yellow, or how about RED!!!!

These titles we give ourselves don’t define us entirely either. We all have multiple sides to our lives, well usually. Even the Pro Domme has to submit sometimes (in various ways. We all do at one time or another). She doesn’t always walk around in latex (I don’t know why not) and 6 inch heels. Sometimes, she goes to the gym, to coffee, to graduate school classes, or to the grocery store, I know that is what submissives are for (mildly joking here). My point is, we all have other responsibilities, and as much as we would love to be a slave/sub or a Master/Mistress, we might have to go to work sometimes, and actually be the dominant there or maybe the submissive. With this being said, in our private fantasy lives we are choosing to portray these roles. However, at the end of the day we are all personally responsible for our actions no matter what role one chooses.

We talk a lot about consent, and often don’t talk about our personal responsibility within play scenarios and interactions. It isn’t one sided either because there are two or more involved in this. Two or more form a dynamic to create a scenario of play. All parties are responsible for their choice to participate. We are not absolved of this in our regular day to day lives, so why do we think we can say, “Ahh, Fuck It!” when it comes to our kinky lives?

I heard recently at a party that, “It is the Top’s responsibility to know when I have had enough.” Of course me being me, I asked, “Sole responsibility or partial responsibility?” Didn’t get an answer.

Once again, I am not saying that people should avoid signs. However, as a responsible bottom shouldn’t you during negotiation talk about your limits even if the other parties don’t? You must take responsibility for yourself even if you identify as an s-type.

In closing, on the other side of this is the Top/D-type, and if they decide to overlook the fact that the other person didn’t mention certain things. Maybe, they are new or maybe, they are really excited or maybe, and I know no one ever does this, but maybe they are under the influence.

Now, as the Top/D-type isn’t that the person’s responsibility to know and almost be the authority or lead in these scenarios? Don’t they have an obligation to learn about those they are going to play with? I know that someone saying they don’t like something isn’t sexy, but I am sure there is something you have in common, or maybe you don’t, and instead of forcing something that could end in not such a good way, it’s better to take RESPONSIBILITY and make the CHOICE not to engage in play if the people talking about play do not align in some major way.

I will end it with this. I might be alone or I might be crazy (getting checked next week) or maybe I am as the youngsters say, “OLD SCHOOL” or just plain old. I really believe that when we communicate effectively with each other great things can happen, or better yet, bad things have a tendency to happen a lot less.

About the Author

Jay has been around the Kink Community for 20 years or so and has explored a lot of different things in that time. Jay has known he enjoyed the s side of the slash since he first began his journey-all though at first he didn’t know what it really was, but he just seemed to like it. He also is a latex fetishist with a really big like for exploring edgier types of play, and has been known to indulge in interrogation, intense predicament bondage, heavy sensory deprivation play, breath play, and many other interesting kinks and fetishes. Jay is also an active outdoor enthusiast with a love of skiing, rock climbing, cycling, mountain biking, flying, hiking, and paddle boarding.  He also indulges in movies, books, art, music, and is an avid fan of baseball both playing and watching.
Over the last 8 years Jay has also delved into teaching and educating on many different topics. He created a sub panel, which he presented at Stockroom University on several occasions. With a few other male submissives he helped form the Sub Male Support Group for LA as well.
On several occasions Dr. Patti Briton has asked  Mistress Hudsy Hawn, Jay, and others to educate future sex therapists on the subject of kink. He has had the opportunity to speak several times about the Art of Saying NO, helping to give people a voice in the community, and not being afraid to stand up for themselves.  Jay also had the chance to do a Ted Talk at the Threshold Clubhouse on how wearing latex can be turned into an entire scene, and has had the amazing opportunity to be a demo bottom on several occasions for Midori, Mistress Morgan Sterling, Miss Hudsy Hawn, and The Baroness Kitty.
Furthermore, Jay was asked to copresent a class on negotiation with Jennifer Masri at the Threshold Clubhouse.  Recently Mistress Bella Bathory and Jay were able to go to USC and present to graduate and under graduate students about the kink lifestyle and what BDSM really means. Jay is always giving of his time and knowledge in the scene, and attends munches, support groups, talks, and gatherings.

This week in kink: September 10, 2018

By 2 Comments

Don’t miss Back To School Camp: Submissive Edition event happening this Sept 15 1:30-5:30 at Lair de Sade!

Classes, crafts, food, raffles, and more!

https://BackToschoolSUB.eventbrite.com

More info on the event page: https://fetlife.com/events/688206

Buy your tickets now!

The Kink Community, like any other community, has its own language and its own unique meanings of words. J.A Rock further discusses this topic and sheds light on this subject

Click here to read more

Ever want to try tantric sex? Sandra LaMorgese explains the benefits of this sexual practice

Click here to learn more

James Michael Nochols takes us deeper into the world of puppy play

Click here to find out more

Have some kinky news to share? Tell us about any upcoming BDSM events, new products, dungeon openings / closings, collarings, kink in mainstream media, and anything else you think kinky folks might be interested to hear about. Send your tips through to kinkweekly@gmail.com, and it might just end up on next week’s “This Week in Kink.”

BDSM Burnout

By 4 Comments

As many of my readers know – and many here at kinkweekly.com – I am in a long-term D/s relationship. Although we are talking more than seven years, it has not been a totally smooth ride. As with all relationships, arguments, tension and boredom enter when you least expect them. That is the bad news. The good news is that – as opposed to vanilla dynamics – it is much easier to right a ship sailing the BDSM waters. Clearly in a true Master/slave dynamic, there is more inherent honesty than its vanilla counterpart. As a personal example, I was in Las Vegas a number of years ago. I met some girl and spent the night. The next morning my submissive called and asked me what I was doing.  I told her I spent a night with a women and my sub said, “Was she hot?” No arguments, no questioning, no insecurity. “Next time can you call me so I can listen,” she added. A vanilla girl more than likely would have torn my head off. But this doesn’t mean that BDSM solves all problems. But a solid, honest, negotiated hierarchy helps. But what if it is simple boredom that is a problem, what in vanilla terms is called “the Seven Year Itch?”

Many longer term D/s couples (and short term couples, too) often suffer from what I call “BDSM burnout.” Why burnout happens is simple enough. Domming (and subbing) ain’t easy. It takes work, energy and time. Sometimes the BDSM relationship can start to become a chore rather than a joy. It can be the submissive who has “had it up to here” with pleasing her Dominant. It can be the Dominant who finds that the effort he/she must put into being the Master/Mistress outweighs the rewards. It can be a combination of the two. However it happens, here are some very effective remedies I can suggest.

Go to a dungeon play party. By attending a dungeon party, you solve three problems at once. First of all, you get away from your house, your phones and your chores for a night. The atmosphere is so far removed from your day-to-day life, you can escape into the world of BDSM effortlessly. Secondly, you can pick up on the energy of the other players. Thirdly, you can observe new ways to play that might inspire you. This is a win/win/win proposition; you might even solve most of your problems in one night!

If you had written a slave diary, both of you should read it. I always recommend that the slave write a diary chronicling his/her play experiences. If you were fortunate enough to have done this, just re-read them and see what got you off – and what didn’t. You can then easily recreate the best of your past scenes. If you did not write one, it might be time to start one now. Should your relationship hit another snag, you will appreciate having a roadmap back.

Boredom busters. It is easy to get bored doing anything. “Filet mignon, filet mignon…not filet mignon again!” Defeating boredom actually takes work. (This is where I agree with the “Dr. FullOfIt” types.) If it is simply a question of being bored with your play, you must put in the effort and master new techniques. For example, if you are into hand spanking, learn to use a cane. If you are into rope bondage, learn more exotic skills like Shibari. If you usually eschew pain, experiment with some very light pain. These types of approaches will definitely introduce excitement into your BDSM life.

Buy new toys. Go through a BDSM catalogue and pick up some toys. You’d be surprised how a new item can fire up your play. There is usually a toy featured on the kinkweekly.com homepage. Click on it. See, that was easy!  

Discuss without protocols. Have a frank discussion without any D/s protocols. The submissive should not be afraid of speaking out; the Dominant should not be afraid of looking un-Domly. What exactly were the cornerstones of your original enthusiasm? Are either of you not pulling your BDSM weight? What particular sequences turned you on or off to D/s? A super-honest dialogue is often all you need.

Don’t be afraid to change your protocols. Nothing is written in stone. If you had protocols you now ignore – resurrect them. If you have maintained some that now bore you – replace them.

Take a break. Try stopping all D/s and BDSM for a month or two. Taking a break – and starting up fresh later on – may just do the trick.

Hire a pro Domme. Many commercial dungeons, like Sanctuary L.A., offer reasonably priced sessions which can be both exciting and instructive.

Think outside the box — switch. There is nothing wrong with trying something completely different. Change can be very exciting!

With just a little work, you can once again have “intense scenes and highly connective play.” And, you will likely find your BDSM interactions to be even more intense the second time around!  

About the Author
After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

 

Rituals

By 5 Comments

Brian Vox-http://www.voxart9.com/

In a previous edition of kinkweekly.com, Slave Bunny offered a terrific piece (http://www.kinkweekly.com/article-guest-author/rituals-part-2/ ) on rituals. Since rituals in BDSM are extremely important, I thought I might present some additional thoughts that illustrate how essential they are in our lifestyle. To paraphrase some football guru, “Rituals aren’t everything, they are the only thing.” I might have got that backwards, but you get the idea!

(Definition of “ritual”: a formal set of specific repetitive actions. In the BDSM context, specific sequences performed by the submissive at the pleasure of the Dominant.)

There are two major purposes for rituals in the BDSM lifestyle. The first is to maintain and reinforce the power exchange that is the essence of all D/s relationships. The second is to facilitate transitioning from “vanilla headspace” to “submissive headspace.” First, let’s examine its uses from a power dynamic point of view.

The most common ritual – it is virtually ubiquitous – is the honorific verbal greeting of “Sir,” “Master,” “Mistress” and “Ma’am.” Addressing the Dominant in this way is a very powerful tool for maintaining the power exchange that is at the heart of any D/s union. It reinforces the air of esteem that a submissive must have for her/his Dominant. The beauty of honorifics is that it offers an elegant way to reinforce the conscious integration of the power exchange within the relationship.

Of course, it is up to the couple to determine when this address will be required. Will it be compulsory 24/7, even in “vanilla” settings? Will it be mandatory only in scene-friendly environments? Is it only to be used during a BDSM scene? However often it is required, it is a verbal corroboration that the Dom/me is to be respected and obeyed in the context of the rules of their relationship. We think the honorific greeting is so essential to any D/s relationship that we offer two digressions on this topic.

Digression number one! Problems are often encountered when the slave is required to use “Master” 24/7. Using the title “Master” at a vanilla party can be dicey. But, there is one slave who came up with a brilliant solution to this problem. She always addressed her Dominant as “Master” but always added the word “Blaster” — as in the “Master Blaster” — in sticky situations. No one ever suspected; she was always able to address her owner as “Master” in just about every circumstance.

Digression number two! Although I am not personally fond of the common practice where a submissive addresses every Dom/me in the community as “Sir” or “Mistress,” there are exceptions for those who are universally respected in the community. I also think it is best to address a prospective Dominant thusly. If you use his/her birth name too often early on, it might become a hard habit to break. Using honorifics judiciously will serve you well.

Rituals are awesome tools for transitioning from “normal headspace” to “submissive headspace.” (We must make the distinction between “subspace,” which is defined as an exhilarated state caused by a rush of endorphins emitted during a BDSM scene, and “submissive headspace,” which can be viewed as the mental state of being in service to the Dominant.) In our busy and stress-filled world, this transition can be a difficult one. For example, if the sub has come home from a tough day at work, he/she might have a hard time getting into a submissive frame of mind. It is not easy to leave work headspace and enter submissive headspace. Rituals make this changeover a lot easier.

The classic greeting, or presentation, ritual is a tried-and-true transition technique. Here the submissive kneels in front of her Dominant and kisses his/her feet, shoes or boots. The sub remains in this position until a hand or verbal signal tells him/her to rise and maintain a kneeling position until instructed further. Another popular ritual is the inspection ritual. Here the submissive is required to kneel with his/her legs spread so the Dominant can inspect her/his private parts and make sure they are satisfactory. This is a superb triggering protocol; it has “submission” written all over it!

Although the greeting and inspection rituals are both popular and powerful, the transitioning protocol can be virtually anything. The Dom/me’s hand on the slave’s cheek, a particular look, a series of words or phrases, a slap to the face, a hair pull or just the touch of the Dom/me’s hand on the neck can trigger the transition. Any series of consistent, ritualized actions can activate the transition into submissive headspace  – and thus reinforce the Dom/me’s “Domspace.”.

Let me offer an innovative way to look at submissive headspace and transitioning. One can categorize submissive headspace into three distinct levels. The first level is “operational submission,” where you are submissive to your Dominant but little is required of you. It is a relaxed submissive state; the power dynamic is acknowledged but rarely actuated. The second stage is “active submission.” Here the sub might be required to be very attentive to the Dom and be available for him; but limits are not pushed. It is a state of familiar submission. No curveballs are thrown. The third space is “slave submission.” Typically, this is during play or training sessions; limits can be pushed and new areas of D/s are often explored. Transitioning into each of these states is most effectively accomplished with specific rituals designed to activate each of these levels as required. For example, a simple honorific can activate the first level. The physical greeting ritual might be used to transition into level two. And an intense inspection ritual might be the prompt to enter level three.

The number and complexity of rituals varies from Dom/me to Dom/me and couple to couple. Whether you are low, medium or high protocol, rituals are essential tools in your BDSM arsenal.

About the Author

After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

A Special Treat for Donna: Part 3

By 6 Comments

bdsm toys and corset background

Click here for Part 1

Click here for Part 2

As we sat back and languidly sipped our drinks, a series of attractive young men summoned the courage to approach and ask to join us.  Madame had the ones she approved sit close to me so I could go to work on them. This was my night to be a bad girl without fear of provoking Madame.  I had full permission to flirt and tease to my lascivious heart’s content. I whispered dirty thoughts, nibbled earlobes, softly stroked inner forearms with my nails, unbuttoned shirts, and lay my hand on crotches.  I loved exercising the almost magical power to raise erections at will. I found it thrilling and wildly stimulating. Madame fully intended for me to respond as such, of course. She wanted me white hot with lust when it finally came time to beckon Nick into our lair.

I found myself particularly taken with a pint-size cutie pie sporting thick, shiny, black waves, dazzling white teeth, luscious lips, and huge, soulful brown eyes with mile-long lashes.  Although I generally preferred big men (being quite a big girl myself), I occasionally found myself fancying a certain muscular, banty rooster type, and he surely fit the bill. He had the body of a flyweight wrestler or maybe a gymnast, and displayed a razor-sharp wit and intellect.  He said he was a Harvard junior, and I had no reason to disbelieve him. Not to traffic in stereotypes, but I felt pretty sure he was Jewish. He could have been Greek, I suppose. It hardly mattered.

I started to make out with him (those lips!), but pulled back after Madame cautioned me not to ruin my expensive makeover.  We whispered lewdly and openly groped, oblivious to the surrounding mass of people. He slid a hand up my dress and attempted to take hold of my stirring cock.  I quickly yanked his hand away, gave it a slap, and said, “Thank you, honey, but we’re done now.”

He regrouped and attempted one more approach, but Madame stepped between us, took tight hold of his upper arm, pulled him up to a standing position, and with her patented, dagger-eyes she said between clenched teeth,“You are dismissed.”  The cute boy shook himself loose and vanished into the shadows. Madame and I erupted in peals of raucous, terribly unladylike laughter. We can be such awful bitches!

Shortly before midnight, Madame announced that it was time to go.  She phoned Nick, and by the time we retrieved our coats and exited the club, the limo was there waiting.  We rode home behind the privacy glass, holding hands, kissing, and giggling just as we had at the beginning of the evening.

Upon arriving home, each of us took an arm and escorted Nick up to our dual-purpose Play/Discipline Room.  The Play/Discipline Room was large, opulently furnished, and amply equipped for all sorts of erotic fun, as well as for the administration of the most serious of disciplinary action.  Madame had Nick remove his uniform, put on a warm silk robe, and sit down on the comfiest chair in the room. I brought him a cold beer in a frozen mug.

While Nick waited and sipped his beer, Madame took me to an adjacent dressing room where she freshened my makeup, strategically perfumed me, and dressed me in my laciest, frilliest corset, with thong, fully fashioned silk stockings, and strappy sandals with 5” heels, all in a matching deep purple.  Madame also took a few minutes to completely lube and stretch my ass in anticipation of the fucking to come.

Madame brought me out and had me model my outfit for Nick.  She then instructed me to stretch out seductively on one of the beds.  Nick removed his robe and joined me, his cock already fully erect. He gazed at me with his gorgeous brown eyes and began to kiss me passionately.  I ran my hands all up and down his smooth, powerfully muscled, young body until I settled on his beautiful straining erection. I took his shaft into my mouth and started sucking.  His cock was smooth, sleek, and delicious. As I sucked, Madame gave my ass an occasional hard slap. These slaps were friendly and sensual, not punitive, and gave me a much different sensation.  My cock hardened as my pleasure grew.

After several minutes of intense foreplay, Nick was ready and so was I.  I rolled a condom over his dick and lay back to take him between my widespread thighs.  Before Nick could get himself into position, however, Madame ordered him to stop. She had been sitting in a chair alongside the bed, watching intently and masturbating.

“Nick, before I permit you to have Donna, I want you to fuck me for a few minutes.”  I looked at her in startled puzzlement. She explained, “Donna, I have allowed you to fuck me and cum inside me on many occasions.  That is the ultimate intimacy and it is an indispensable part of our lovemaking. Now I wish to reciprocate. By penetrating my pussy before he fucks you, Nick will serve as a living vessel to place my juices inside you, as you have placed yours inside me.  This will complete our circle of intimacy and seal our love as never before.”

“But Madame,” I queried.  “Couldn’t you accomplish the same yourself using a dildo?”

“My precious one,” she replied.  “A dildo is nothing but cold, inanimate plastic.  Nick is a warm, living, breathing human being. I need you to feel the heat and pulsating vitality of living flesh deep inside you as my most, intimate essence is transmitted to your most intimate recesses.”  As Madame spoke these words my heart swelled with ever-growing adoration. This special ritual was to remain a constant feature of all our future stud service sessions.

Nick mounted Madame in the missionary posture, thrust his swollen dick into Madame’s dripping cunt, and fucked her vigorously for several minutes, as I watched and enjoyed Madame’s forceful pelvic counterthrusts, rhythmic breathing, and delicate, girlish moans.  She ordered Nick to pull out and he turned his full attention to me.

I lay back as I had before and opened my legs to welcome Nick into my warm, moist cave.  Nick eagerly accepted my invitation and proceeded to fuck me with the same intensity as he had fucked Madame.  Unlike Madame, I am exceptionally noisy during sex, and soon I was letting fly all manner of full-throated vocalizations, including some odd spoken phrases I had never uttered before and will likely never utter again.  I can’t recall exactly what I said, but Madame was amused, as always.

Nick took me doggy-style for a time, and then we moved to the spooning position.  As Nick continued to drive into me, Madame kissed and licked me, pinched my nipples, and stroked my cock.  Within a few minutes I burst forth all over Madame’s belly, which she had strategically positioned for me to cum on.  Shortly thereafter, Nick approached a shuddering climax. Following Madame’s instructions, Nick withdraw his cock from me and he, too, rained his thick cum across the full, golden expanse of Madame’s smooth, tanned belly.  When it was done, I hungrily licked Madame clean of our blended ejaculate.

Madame and I were too exhausted to escort Nick to the door, so we both kissed him tenderly, and sent him on his way with another cold beer for him to enjoy when he got home. After Nick left, she took me by the hand and silently led me up the stairs and into our bedroom. She picked up a wooden hairbrush from her vanity and sat down in an armless accent chair which she kept in our room for one purpose. I knew what was in store. I had been indulged quite enough tonight, and it was time for me to be forcibly reminded of my place as Madame’s obedient bitch. I knelt and kissed Madame’s feet, then stood and draped my torso over Madame’s warm, ample thighs, where I awaited that which I both feared and craved.

“You are a cheap, dirty little whore, do you understand me?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“What are you, bitch?”

“I’m a cheap, dirty little whore, ma’am.”

“That’s right, you filthy cunt. But you’re my cheap, dirty little whore, you shameless cocksucker, you wanton anal slut, and don’t you ever forget it! I may have allowed you to behave badly tonight, but bad behavior never goes unpunished in my house. There will always be a price to pay, and you are about to pay it. In full”

“Yes, ma’am. Thank you for all that you do for me.”

Madame began with just a few light slaps with her open hand, and then steadily increased the force of her blows. I yelped and softly moaned as she spanked my well-fucked ass harder and harder, faster and faster. She paused for a moment, gently stroked my flaming cheeks and inspected her handiwork. She pried open my ass cheeks, roughly jammed two fingers inside me, and pulled at and stretched my sore sphincter to remind me of what a nasty anal slut I was. Madame then picked up the hairbrush and resumed paddling me with the flat wooden back of the implement. Each smack hurt more than the last, but left me aching for more. Receiving Madame’s harshest discipline was my greatest joy.

When Madame finally finished, she had me stand up and display my stinging bottom to her. She rubbed some cooling lotion into my inflamed skin. I examined my ass in the mirror and admired the beautiful pink color she had lovingly brought forth, along with just a touch of purple bruising on each cheek. I was proud to bear my Mistress’s marks and wished I could show them to the world so all would know I belonged to Madame and no one else.

Now thoroughly spent, we barely managed to grope our way to our bed before we collapsed into a tangled, snoring heap.  Another perfect night together.

About the Author

In the early to mid-2000s, Donna Queen enjoyed a brief, unexpected, but memorable career as an amateur transgender porn star, with a devoted worldwide following. She is now fully transitioned and happily married to a wonderful woman, and is no longer active in the porn scene, although her pictures and videos remain widely distributed and she often receives fan requests for new material. While she no longer makes visual porn, Donna is a gifted writer of fiction in multiple genres, including BDSM erotica. While Donna writes primarily from her own perspective as a lifelong submissive, she also demonstrates a sure grasp of the dominant’s point of view. Although her work is first and foremost powerfully erotic, Donna strives to create fully realized and authentically human characters, and her stories always reflect her loving, generous spirit and delightfully wicked sense of humor.