long distance

10 Fun Ways to Spice Up a Long-Distance Relationship

August 3, 2020 By JC Way 2 Comments

hearts, long distance bdsm relationship — via stock.adobe.com

Long-distance becomes a challenge for people that are in relationships. Couples that are many miles apart must work diligently to spice things up and keep the love connection strong. Those that are serious about maintaining a relationship with their mate will look for ways to keep the fire burning. There are many ways to do this. Creative couples can always find fun ways to connect, even when they are not physically together.

1. Phone calls

In the world of social media, it has become so easy to get lost in those text message only relationships. People can find themselves drifting apart because they’re not having conversations. Some text messages get lost in translation. It is advantageous for anyone that is engaging in a long-distance relationship to consider making phone calls. A sexy voice in the middle of the night can be alluring. People that put their time into making calls are also reassuring their partners of their love.

2. Remote Control Sex Toys

Another thing that helps people that are in long-distance relationships are remote control sex toys, especially vibrators. It should be no surprise that sex toys can be great for video calls. It is easy to watch one another with remote vibrators and experience intimacy even when there is distance. There should always be an outlet for expressing intimacy between couples, and it is essential to put these remote sex toys to use regularly because it strengthens the bond.

3. Watching Movies Together

It is easier to watch movies together in the age of video streaming. You can engage in conversations about movies as you watch something at the same time. There are so many movies that you can stream, and this makes it easy to find apps that have movies that both of you can start simultaneously.

4. Virtual Reality Video Games

Playing virtual reality games together can also be something that spices up a relationship. There is a wide multitude of gaming options for those that are interested in the virtual world.

There is no shortage of gaming possibilities when it comes to playing action games and simulation games. Couples can feel like they are genuinely connected and in the same room with one another when they dive into these virtual reality experiences.

5. Video Calls / Dance Together While Apart

Participating in video calls gives you a chance to see one another. Seduction can occur this way. A little cleavage or a bit of undressing through a video chat can be a massive turn on that can open the doors to a stimulating evening.

6. Raunchy Text Messages

This teasing with live video footage can be enhanced with raunchy text messages as well. Sending sweet text messages to one another during the day is nice, but a couple of sexual innuendos help couples shift gear and spice things up.

This is great because it is a short and simple way to let your partner know that you are thinking about them. The sexy text message is a break from the usual good morning or goodnight text messages. It heightens the level of arousal between long-distance couples and builds up the passion in the relationship.

7. Snail Mail

Couples that think outside of the box see the beauty of the snail mail. They know that they can send beautifully crafted letters to one another that is much deeper than a text message. Crafting a letter takes time. It is showing extra effort. Letting writing is a lost art in the love department. Sending letters where you express your feelings can be something that can turn on your partner. The ability to have a letter that they can hold on to as a keepsake will go a long way.

8. Sending Gifts To One Another

It is also good to consider using the postal mail service to send gifts to one another. Sending a gift that is a surprise can be something that turns up the heat when it comes to a long-distance relationship. A package with sexy remote toys and other things like candy or your partner’s favorite music can be very useful in spicing up a long-distance romance. Everyone loves to get a gift and giving people gifts that they can use with you will be a great way to connect when you contact one another.

9. Music

Listening to music together is something that can truly enhance the relationship as well. Some apps allow people to create playlists that they can upload and share with another. Take the time to video call one another and dance together to your favorite songs. Love songs that you share make for some of the best relationship memories.

10. Planned Trips / Spontaneous Trips

Every aspect of the relationship does not have to be planned. Spontaneity is the spice of life in the relationship world. Sometimes it is good to decide to meet up spontaneously. Making a trip to see one another face to face can keep the momentum going in a long-distance relationship. Sometimes it is just good to hold one another, and taking the time to travel to one another will spice up any relationship. When you plan to meet, you can heighten your excitement by anticipating the trip to see one another.

You may even be able to surprise the person you are dating by simply showing up in their city or state. This is the element of surprise in a long-distance relationship that brings about excitement, and this type of excitement makes the relationship thrive.

The Final Verdict

You ultimately need to realize that the long-distance relationship works much better when you see how much sexual stimulation can be achieved even when you are not physically with one another. The ability to spice things up regularly with remote sex toys can be just the right amount of excitement needed to help you maintain intimacy when you are apart from one another.

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About the Author

Writer & Reviewer for The Sex Toy Collective, JC Way has covered everything from Butt Plugs to Fake Cum, sprinkling his dry British wit into all things sexy.

Long Distance D/s

March 12, 2018 By Baadmaster 5 Comments

As the Internet turns twenty, more or less, we should address the popularity of long distance D/s relationships. For the most part, the days of “Master, twenty-seven years old with twenty-five years experience looking for submissive” are gone. With technology like Skype, Duo, Facetime and webcamming, among others, it is fairly easy to get a handle on what your long-distance party is or is not. Thus are born a myriad of LDR’s that can approximate many of the aspects of a proximate D/s relationship. That is the good news.

The bad news is that, when you are in a long distance Dom/me-sub relationship, it can often be difficult to maintain the power exchange that is at the heart of such an arrangement.

The D/s dynamic is relatively easy to maintain when the Dom/me and sub are proximate. The Dom/me gives an order and can quickly evaluate how the sub obeys. Punishment or reward might be called for; the Dom/me can make an instant assessment of the situation. But, the principles of consistency and swiftness of reward and punishment that apply to live-in Master/slave relationships do not necessarily translate to long-distance relationships; in-person Dominance can be hard to duplicate. There can be time delays in the Dom/me’s discovering infractions, just as there can be interruptions in meting out the actual punishment; these obstacles can even result in unintended misunderstandings. Thus, you might be wise for both parties to cut a little slack in all interactions when in a LDR. Murphy’s Law – “What can go wrong, will go wrong” – is in full effect in LDR’s!

In a long-distance BDSM relationship, the following concerns, ones that might be easily overlooked in a local liaison, must be addressed. And, they should be dealt with as quickly as possible. (If you have already covered these points, then you should be less worried about your relationship.)

What are your “away” rules? Can he/she see other men/women? Are you allowed to play? What exactly constitutes play? Hard and soft limits. These are items can usually talked about over coffee; in long distance they are often overlooked. Besides, in local, the “horniness because of distance” factor does not apply. These critical concerns must be covered in great detail, to both parties’ satisfaction.
Do you both see the monogamy/poly continuum in the same way? Is he/she a “one-slave” Dom/me? A “one-slave” Dom/me with play partners? A poly Dom/me? Are you the only collared slave he/she plans to have? With respect to these issues, are you on the same page that he/she is on?
You should agree on a specific call schedule. For example, you might agree to speak on the phone twice a week and Skype/Facetime/Duo (or whatever interface you both use) once a week. Obviously, if this schedule isn’t adhered to, anxiety can result – so both sides must make a special effort to stick to the routine until you unite for good.

Starting off on a good foundation is extremely important here. In a local relationship, you can fix things quickly with a face-to-face talk over dinner. In long-distance, this is impossible. Dinner means a plane trip and those wonderful TSA lines. Thus, small problems can fester and can become big problems. If you can nip them in the bud, you have a much better chance in your long-distance romance.

When you are dealing with LDR’s, different rules apply. Since you are both far away from each other, either side can hide lots of baggage. Thus, both sides must be held to a higher standard – if you are planning to take it real time someday. Trust must be virtually absolute. The fact that you say, “The phone calls used to be twice a month and now it’s been a couple months since I have talked to him/her,” is a red flag. Red flags eat into trust; and without trust your relationship will die. But, there might be a reasonable explanation. So, before you jump off the “trust express,” make sure your concerns are real and not unfounded paranoia. (Long-distance relationships and paranoia are roommates!)

Our technology is such that you can easily see the other person. And there is nothing like seeing the other person’s face to know all’s right with the world! Long distance is tough enough without both of you disappearing into the vague world of misunderstood e-mails, texting and Twitter DM’s!

By BaadMaster
After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.