10 tips for shibari beginners

The title of this article, “Shibari Made Easy,” is really just a tease. Obviously, this would be more like, “Learn Brain Surgery In One Hour.” But now that I have your attention, I can help you have fun with rope bondage right out of the box!

Here at kinkweekly.com, we have spotlighted a video on Shibari —www.kinkweekly.com/photography/french-shibari-rope-hogtied/ Yes, it looks intimidating. And to learn Shibari, I suggest you study with a Rope Master if you wish to learn this incredible art form. Surely, it cannot be explained in one article. As to where you can find a Shibari instructor, I recommend you contact your local BDSM dungeon and talk to them. It is something that will require more than book knowledge; hands-on instruction will surely be the order of the day if you wish to start to learn this amazing skill.

That being said, I can give you some quick general rope bondage tips and concepts to get your feet wet in the world of rope bondage. And if you are a younger lifestyler, where many people understandably want instant BDSM gratification, this article can get you up and running pretty quickly – not full blown Shibari — if you follow my guidelines.

Keep in mind that you don’t have to be a Rope Master to do a fantastic rope bondage scene. If you follow these ten basic precautions you can start almost immediately.

1. Best you start out at a reputable dungeon where you can observe and ask questions in addition to playing.
2. If at a dungeon, ask the Dungeon Monitor if you have any questions.
3. Have a safe word and safe signal. Negotiate all limits beforehand.
4. Don’t cut off circulation. Check to see that one finger fits between the bonds and the skin.
5. If you see skin discoloration, or other signs of severe discomfort, stop the scene whether the submissive safes or not.
6. If your partner is experiencing numbness and/or is unable to move an extremity, cut them out from the rope bondage immediately.
7. Don’t put rope around the neck, ever.
8. Never leave a bound submissive alone, ever.
9. Have bandage scissors at the ready.
10. Don’t forget aftercare.  

Rope tips:  Use half inch or even 5/8th inch nylon rope to start with. This can be purchased at any “Home Depot” type store. I would caution against hemp, sisal or some of the harder ropes. The thicker nylon ropes have more “give” and thus are well suited for beginners.

Scene suggestions for those new to rope bondage:  To get your feet wet in bondage, you might start by tying a submissive to a chair. This is probably the easiest rope bondage scene imaginable. You start by tying one arm, then proceed to the other one. This surely isn’t Shibari. But it is easy to do right out of the box, so to speak. Just observe the listed safety precautions and tie away. Add a blindfold and you have the makings of a very hot scene!

Tying a sub to any stationary object is quite similar to tying her/him to a chair. Some rope, a little common sense, some basic safety precautions and you are good to go.

If you go to a dungeon, using rope to tie a submissive to a St. Andrew’s Cross can be exciting – and quite dramatic. Once the slave is tied to the cross, the fun begins. If you are at a dungeon, you can ask anyone there about basic rope ties. If you are at a loss, just cuff your submissive and then tie the cuffs to the cross with ropes. This is a great way to introduce you and your submissive to the world of rope bondage. Again, it might not be Japanese rope bondage, but it can be a lot of fun!

Finally, if you have a female submissive, one of the most popular bondage activities is good old breast bondage. Once again, it is pretty easy to do – but make sure you stop if the breasts become discolored or the bottom safes. Better safe than sorry.

Rope bondage in all its forms – from light to heavy to simple rope ties to Shibari — is truly an art form that takes “a minute to learn, a lifetime to master.” And, you can have a lot of fun doing it during that lifetime!

About the Author

After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.