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Using BDSM To Cope With Trauma

January 17, 2021 By VICE 2 Comments

Many folks have found therapeutic benefits to practicing BDSM.

We, at KinkWeekly, have published many articles on just that.

Click below to find out more about how BDSM can aide with the effects of being a trauma survivor!

***Please note, that BDSM is usually not the only thing needed to treat the effects of trauma. BDSM can help, but is usually not the only therapeutic modality needed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mo4mF-17lVQ

Tagged With: anxiety, bdsm, bdsm community, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, fetish, kink, mental health, ptsd, trauma

Training/Discipline vs Punishment

January 17, 2021 By SafferMaster 2 Comments

sexy submissive hair pulling toilet slut
via stock.adobe.com

My ideal relationship is a 24/7 TPE (Total Power Exchange) D/s Dynamic where I am fully in alignment  with my submissive masochist who has chosen to serve me because that is exactly what she wants. She  chooses me to kneel before as a new action each day. My orientation is to enroll her in what I am up to  and for her to see the possibility of the dynamic that allows her to choose me to gift her submission to  because she wants to serve me. Another way of saying this is that she does what I want her to do  because she wants to do it. 

In this context, training my submissive to please me is as simple as making simple tweaks or suggestions  to her behavior to guide her as she reaches for perfection in her service. It is high order for her to  achieve her goal of pleasing me ongoingly. 

Let me offer one example. It pleases me a great deal that she kneels for me to put herself forward to be  used. In so doing, she invites me to take her, and to use her as I see fit. She is offering herself by gifting  her body and mind to me. Her presentation is particular. Before we played for the very first time, we  talked for months in detail about our perfect dynamic ideas, and what it would take for it to succeed in  creating it, and we talked about how to begin our total power exchange. I invited her to give me her  consent by putting herself forward to be claimed. We also talked about how during her claiming  ceremony she would be marked inside with piss and outside with a cane. The time came to begin when  she ended her marriage, and a space was created to start something new. We talked in detail over  months during which time my desire crystalized, and I shared with her my particular preference to have  her present herself in the Nadu pose. 

The first time she offered herself to me was the day she put herself forward to be claimed. Because it  was the first time, when she knelt for me, I noticed a few ways that she could improve her posture to  please me and recognized an opportunity to coach her. I gently corrected and adjusted her posture to assume the perfect Nadu pose. Knees apart, back straight, head lowered, hands resting in a relaxed  position, palms up, on her thighs. Perfect to my eye. Only one time since then, more than two years ago,  was I promoted to make a correction. I gently turned her hands over to perfect her pose. Now when she  kneels for me, and she offers herself to be used every single day, she assumes the pose perfectly and  she pleases me. With this simple action, she creates me.  

Part of her training includes taking on a new context for her life as she moved from an abusive marriage  where her context was one of survival, to our dynamic where she was being trained to live with freedom  and power and full self-expression. Naturally, that is a big lift in the best of circumstances.  

On occasion, because we live together in our 24/7 TPE dynamic, she would let her mind run away with  her as she reverted to the ordinary way of being. Because she was in an abusive marriage before we  met, something would come up between us, some issue or other that she would make meaning about.  This would inevitably create an upset or space between us. This is something we had agreed not to  allow. At the same time, I observed that this sort of upset tended to occur predictably when we had not  engaged in impact play for more than a few days. I thought about it, and it occurred to me that she  experienced total clarity for days after we engaged in intense impact play, and I made the determination that what she really needed was my daily attention as her Dom. I implemented a daily “maintenance  spanking” protocol which she agreed to, reluctantly at first, worrying about being what it would mean to  be spanked by her sadist every day. 

New actions lead to unexpected outcomes. What happened for her, is that she is now crystal clear about  how this new action has opened her exploration of her experience as a masochist and now she looks  forward to her spanking because in addition to fully expressing herself as a masochist, the spankings  lead to hot, hot sex and she experiences multiple orgasms every day. One result of our daily spanking  routine is a daily scene where her pussy, ass and mouth are used in addition to her having her ass  spanked red. It’s a very erotic and sexy daily experience and has furthered our dynamic bringing us closer together.  

She is trained to serve me during every waking hour and even in bed, where she cups my balls as we  share a daily gratitude practice, we often find that her nightly stroking of my cock turns into her gibing  me head, and she falls asleep with my taste on her lips after we roll over to spoon, falling asleep with my  hand holding her breast. 

Training my slut to please me is an ongoing process of enrolling her in being the submissive I want her to  be. Here is the important thing. There is never anything wrong. She never needs punishment because  she is a service slut who strives to please and if she fails, she punishes herself harder than anything I  could do. Remember, she is a masochist, so if I use impact to punish her, am I really punishing her? My  view is that a 24/7 dynamic training is ongoing as she strives to please me without fail. Given that she is  in an ongoing training paradigm, which is to gently prompt and coach required behaviors, the question  remains as to why, when and how I would choose to punish my submissive?  

Allow me to offer an example of a situation that occurred where punishment was required even though  she was in training. Early on she had made an agreement with me to not perve (access or read) my  messages without my permission. She broke her word and was out of integrity with me by accessing my Fetlife account one morning when I was still sleeping. She then spent the day making meaning out of a  few message exchanges she had read bits and pieces of. Because I leave my computer screens open and  often step away from my office (I work at home), we made the agreement requiring her to avoid taking  advantage of the access, and to be sure, it required some degree of self-discipline on her part not to  immediately revert to old familiar behavior out of a natural tendency to be suspicious. She did, after all,  live for decades with an abusive husband who repeatedly stepped out on her. 

While I understood her motivations, she had, nevertheless, indeed broken her agreement with me. A  break in integrity demands a consequence. In this case the strategy was to first teach her how to restore  her integrity with me. Restoring integrity is a necessary part of the process. First she had to identify and  state what action she took to break the agreement and fall out of integrity – she perved my messages – then what the impact of that was for me – a lack of trust, a feeling of being let down, disappointment,  etc, and for her, a feeling of letting me down, being untrustworthy, of knowing herself as someone  untrustworthy, and so forth, including how it made her feel to know herself as someone who breaks  agreements, and then she had to state what structure she would put in place to not have the broken  agreement occur again in the future – she made a commitment to not access my computer again – , and  finally there had to be a consequence. It is important to note that punishment never comes from a place of anger. It comes from a place of love. So I chose a punishment that would get her attention and be  limited in its scope and one that would give her time to assess her behavior. Figging. She was required to  go to the store and select a stem of ginger. Then she would come home, peel it and rough it up with a  fork to make it juicy. Then she would present it to me and request that I insert it for her and then she  tool a position kneeling on all fours as she repeated the request that I “place the ginger into her ass for  30 minutes so that she could contemplate her behavior.” 

Afterwards we talked with her kneeling at my feet, and she tearfully expressed thankfulness that she  was able to restore her Integrity. It was also the first time that she had ever been given a chance to  restore her integrity and she was very relieved that we could let the situation go completely with her integrity restored. 

Is corporal punishment ever legitimate as a routine way to interact with a submissive? Putting aside  masochists who choose hard impact play as their preferred kink, there is one consideration where  corporal punishment is legitimate in my mind. That is where a submissive has requested corporal  punishment as motivation for achieving a difficult discipline. For example, I had a submissive request  hard corporal punishment for failing to stay on course in the program I designed for her to improve her  health and fitness, modify her diet and reduce her alcohol intake. In this situation she agreed that she  would be on an escalating punishment schedule for each breach of agreement. Now keep in mind, we  used the integrity model, so she had to deal with restoring her integrity as well, BUT each transgression  escalated her punishment by 3 cane strokes. She was to present herself to be caned each week. Initially  we started with 3 strokes. So she got 3 strokes the first week and the second week, but by the third  week she started to revert to her old habits. So she got 6 strokes and when she failed to live up to her  agreement, 9 and so on. The idea was that there would be a level of weekly punishment where she  would choose to be her word rather than get additional punishment. In her case that number of strokes  was 15. Being caned 15x by a sadist with a heavy cane on her bare unprepared bottom while counting  out loud and holding her posture as she thanked me for each stroke was intense. She preferred not to  have more punishment than that. She was caned and then, she was required to kneel before me to  make a new agreement. As you can imagine, this was highly motivating for her. She would come to be  punished each week in order to motivate her, and 15 strokes kept her on track for better health. 

So, to summarize, training is a process without any negative input that is more akin to coaching. As a  coach of a team sport, you would not berate your players for small errors of not understanding, you  would teach them and coach them to perform. With a submissive, it’s the same thing, the difference is  that you are seeking an intimate partner who you want to be all in. You are seeking complete alignment. 

Be a coach. 

Punishment is only warranted when agreements are broken and it’s important that the punishment fit  the crime. A small break in integrity does not deserve the same punishment as a major transgression.  But most important, there must be resolution. It is important that punishment does not result in  resentment or space between you. Discipline using corporal punishment is a negotiated agreement. You  are really being the accountability buddy by using corporal punishment to enforce agreements. Both the  Dom and the sub must be on the same page. This is coaching at a very high level where in addition to the coaching guidance you offer your submissive, you are also responsible for her motivation and also  for holding her accountable. 


SafferMaster and Lady Petra offer Kink Relationship Coaching with online, group, and personal coaching options.  

You can access the coaching services offered by Lady Petra Playground by reaching out for an initial conversation- LadyPetraPlaground@gmail.com  

The Patreon is also a way to sign up: https://www.patreon.com/LadyPetrasPlayground 

Lady Petra and SafferMaster also produce the Kinky cocktail Hour podcast available on all podcast platforms

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm punishment, bdsm relationship, discipline, fetish, kink, submissive, submissive training

This week in kink: January 18, 2021

January 17, 2021 By Dexx 2 Comments

This week Shireen Khalil writes about Sherry Lever, a 69 year old, thriving Dominatrix.

It’s true that age is just a number!

Click below to read more of Sherry’s riveting story!

UK grandmother shares inside look at life as a 69yo dominatrix after divorce – NZ Herald
She was once a chef, but when her husband left her she embarked on a racy, new career.
NZ Herald

BDSM has gotten more exposure over the years.

Whether you like the show or not, the Netflix show, Bonding is bringing BDSM and sex work more into the public eye.

With this being said, Showbiz CheatSheet, exposes the inner workings of this series.

Click below to find out more!

‘Bonding’: A Look at the True Story Behind Netflix’s Dominatrix Comedy

yahoo lifestyle! reports that BDSM is the most popular kink with folks over 60.

BDSM is definitely not reserved for the youngsters! Anyone and everyone is welcome!

Click below to read more about these intriguing findings!

BDSM the most popular kink amongst over 60s, study claims
A new study has delved into the sex lies of the over 60’s and some of the results may surprise you.
au.lifestyle.yahoo.com

Have some kinky news to share? Tell us about any upcoming BDSM events, new products, dungeon openings / closings, kink in mainstream media, and anything else you think kinky folks might be interested to hear about. Send your tips through to kinkweekly@gmail.com, and it might just end up on next week’s “This Week in Kink.”

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, consensual, consent, fetish, masochism, sadism, sado-masochist, sadomasochism, sex, Sex Work Community, sex worker rights, sex workers, sexual fantasy, sexual safety

Piggie’s Day Out

January 17, 2021 By Joji Sada 2 Comments

big little cute woman with pigtails and teddy bear
via stock.adobe.com

***All works of erotica are fictional. We NEVER condone anything that is not consensual.


You have talked about this trip for months.

It started in passing.  You wanted to go visit some of your old haunts.  You wanted to see what had changed, who was still there, and surprise a few members of your leather family.

I was excited for you.

It’s not often you get the chance to be free Sir.  For you to take even these three days to visit is out of the ordinary. 

You were all set.  You asked me to book you a room.  After all, you cannot surprise family if you ask ahead of time to stay there.

I booked you a room with a king size bed, located only a few doors from the jacuzzi.  Long trips like this are murder on your body.  I know you will need to relax, and the heat will help you.

About a month ago, you asked me to come with.  I was surprised.  You had been looking forward to some time to yourself.  I did not wish to be underfoot.

You told me it was my decision.  Logically, you planned on taking some gear to use at a party and you would appreciate the help but would not force me to go.

I knew I was going the minute you asked.  Even kneeling quietly in a corner while you played would be enjoyable to me.  

I like watching you play Sir.

Course, I have never met a girl who was not mesmerized by you.


It is Friday now.  We are up before the sun, packing the van with your gear, our clothes, and a small cooler with drinks and snacks.

We have seven hours of driving ahead of us.  I am not looking forward to that.  I am worried I will get motion sick, like I often do, but you seem far less worried.

I run downstairs and say my goodbyes to the family, stopping to grab a jacket.  I know it will be cold for a while.

I lay my jacket in the car and I hear you call me into the garage.  I figured you needed my help.

I was wrong.

I stepped through the open door and one hand is on the back of my neck while your other covers my mouth.

You stare me down and get close to my face.

“Shh.  From this point out, you are in service mode.  You will worry about nothing.  Is that understood?”. You remove your hand from my mouth.

“Yes Sir”. My voice is breathy.  It often is when you take control so suddenly.

“Good.  Bend over and pull your panties down.”

The garage door is wide open.  Anyone could see us.  But it’s been less than a minute since you told me I am in service mode and I have no desire to start the trip on a bad note.

I bent over, pulling my short black sun dress up my back and my lace panties to my knees.

Two of your fingers rub across my clit.  You know I have no control. A few short strokes and then you plunged your fingers right inside me.  I gritted my teeth.  I have always been tight, and I cannot naturally lube.  We both know it hurts without preparation.

You finger fuck me until I am trying to push back against you.  

“Still.”

I whined softly.  I do not wish to be caught but I am always desperate when you touch me.

I felt something round press against my cunt.  It slips inside with only a bit of pressure.

You replace my panties and prompt me to stand up.  I am pulled back against your chest and your lips rest against my ear.

“That will stay in place until I say otherwise.  Did you pack the rest of what I asked?”

“Yes Sir,” I responded, thinking of both the clothespins and the clover clamps in my purse.

This is going to be an interesting ride and we have not even left yet.


We have been on the road for about two hours now and I don’t know how much longer I can take this.  Without so much as a word, you keep turning on the toy you slipped  inside of me.  I should have known it would be more involved than just keeping me filled for the trip.

Fast pulses until I am nearing the edge.  Then you cut the power.  My body convulses with the sudden stop.  I know better than to cum without permission.  Even if you are pushing my body to the limit, repeatedly.

Four hours in and my body is beyond tense.  You have been edging me continuously for the whole trip.  Soon, we see a sign that says we are five miles from the next town.  Your game intensifies.

“We are going to stop for gas and to get a drink.”  When you smile, I know that is not all that will be happening.

“Yes, Sir”

“Take the clamps out of your purse and put them on.”  You wait patiently as I do as instructed.  I gasp a little at the pressure.  The clover clamps bite hard on my tender flesh and press uncomfortably against my piercings.  I have never made it more than an hour in these, and that was pushing myself to tears.  “Now, slip your panties off.”  Just as I start removing them, you turn the toy to high and I squeeze my legs together just to gain some semblance of control.  I slide them down kick them from my ankles.  I move to pick them up, but you tell me to leave them.  

“When we stop, you are going to go inside and get us drinks.  Take your time sweetie, I will be waiting.”

My head drops down to my chest.  I know that my cheeks are turning a soft shade of red.  You know how much this embarrasses me to be so underdressed in public.

“What’s a matter sweetie?”

“Nothing, Sir.  I am feeling very shy.”

“Awww, poor little piggie.”

That just turns me an even brighter red.  I enjoy being your little piggie, but I am extremely shy outside of our home.  You love pushing me to face that embarrassment.

It is only a few miles to the gas station, and I am already feeling the bite of the clamps.  I close my eyes, trying to breathe through the pain.  Of course, you knew what I was trying to do.  You prefer when I stay in the moment.  

Suddenly, I feel your hand slap down onto my bare thigh.  My eyes fly open and I grunt from the force.  I look at you and you are simply grinning, keeping your eyes on the road.  I look down to my leg and I can see the outline of your palm.  The imprint won’t stay long but I will feel the smack for a long while.

We pull to a stop before I realize we have arrived.  I grab my wallet and my mask.  I still find it ironic that my face is covered but the rest of me is bare beneath my dress.  I am slow to close the passenger door after I get out and you raise an eyebrow at me.  

I take a deep breath, turn around, and head inside.  I have never felt like my dress was too short or revealing as I have at this moment.  It feels like all the eyes are on me.  My hands nervously tuck at the hem of my dress, tugging it down.  I kneel down slowly to get our drinks.  They are always on the bottom of the cooler, but you knew that.  I curse you under my breath as the vibrations start up again.  I grab the drinks and my legs wobble slightly as I try to stand.  

You are impossible, Sir.

I slowly make my way up to the counter.  I wave away a kind strangers concern at how I am walking.  I must look a right sight.  I breathe deeply as I wait for my turn to pay.  It is instances like this that I am thankful my face is covered. 

I swipe my card and offer my thanks as I grab my bag.  I walk as quickly as I can to the car without raising suspicion.  I reach for the handle, only to find the door locked.  I look through the window and you are staring at me with your fingers on the lock.  The toy surges to its highest setting and my forehead drops against the window.  I am going to collapse at this rate.  My legs are shaking, and my breathing is getting erratic.

I know you can see me whispering against the window.  It is a continuous litany of “please” and “Sir.”  I am not even sure if I am asking to finally be allowed an orgasm or if I just want inside the car.  After a couple of minutes, I hear the lock click open.  I open the door and climb inside.  

“What took you so long sweetie?”  

I just glare at you as you chuckle.  You are far too amused by this.

I pop the top on your drink as you pull away from the gas station.  You have silenced the toy for now but without the distraction, I am starting to feel the intense pain of the clamps.  They have been on nearly twenty minutes now.  I can feel the pain radiating into my back.  

“Sir, may I remove the clamps?”

“When we reach city limits.”

I close my eyes.  That is nearly five miles.  Red light after red light, five miles is a very long time.

Two miles down and I am unsure if I can do this any longer.  “Please, Sir.”

“No.  You are almost there sweetie.  You can do this.”  Deep breath.

I am watching the street signs intently.  Another mile down.  My hands have curled into a fist.  You have kept the toy silent for a reason.  You want me to experience the pain without distraction.  You want me to endure it.  You want me to know that I can.

One mile to go.  My body is stoic.  Every movement antagonizes the clamps.  The cloth of my dress is nearly unbearable.

As soon as we crossed the city limits, I was ready to remove them.  “Please Sir.  May I remove them now?”  Its always better to double check with you.  I never know if you will have changed your mind and start something even more wicked.

“Yes, you may.  You did good.”

I removed them and immediately press my palms against my nipples as the blood rushed back into them.  It is so intense.  All I want to do is be allowed to orgasm.  I know that is a long time away.  But a girl can dream.


It has been a long trip Sir.  My body is exhausted.  You have been edging me for eight hours, if we include the stops we made.  My skin is so sensitive.  My dress feels heavy and the slight breeze makes my knees quiver.  You have had the toy tease me, pushed me with my clamps, and had me tease myself openly on the drive.  I can tell you that seats are high enough that I am positive I was on full display.  Is that why we took the roads that are crowded with semi-trucks?

You get us checked in to the hotel.  We are not meeting anyone else until tomorrow.  So, this should be a good chance to relax.

I should have known better.


Once everything is put away, you take a seat in the wingback chair near the window.  The curtains are drawn, and you ask me to come stand in front of you.  You sit forward slightly, and your hands wrap around my thighs, resting on my ass.  I stand silently, waiting for your instruction.

You pull one hand back and bring it up to cover my cunt.  My eyes rest on the top of your head and my hands come up to your shoulder as you smack my lips hard. Two, three, four times.  Your fingers slip between my lips as my fingers tighten on your shoulders.  My legs are shaking as I hold myself still. You slide over my clit.  Its so sensitive from all the teasing.  I can feel the pulsing in my back.  You slide forward and I feel you hook the toy and pull it.  I feel so swollen and the tugging hurts.  You bring your other hand off my ass and snap twice.  

With relief, I let my legs give out and drop to my knees.  My eyes go to the floor and my hands rest on my thighs.

Your fingers come up to my lips and I suck them clean without hesitation.  Once you are satisfied, you bring the toy to my lips and I repeat the process.  You pull it from my mouth and drop it into my hands.  My head drops forward onto your knees as I steady myself.   

You run your fingers through my hair and speak softly.  “When you are settled, I want you to crawl to the bathroom and leave the toy by the sink to be cleaned later.  Then I want you to crawl to the door and bring back the bag I left there.  Do you understand, piggie?”

I nod my head.  Your fingers tighten in my hair and pull my head back to look you in the eye.  “Care to try that again?”

“Yes, Sir.  I understand, Sir.”

You let my hair go and I relax back into position.  I appreciate that you are letting me settle into my role.  It has been so long since I have been in continuous service like this.  My head is in its confused state.  It is where I can still feel the pain and sensitivity, but my mind has yet to clear of everyday stress.  I need this.  I need to just be here, with you, and forget everything else.

Thank you for knowing me as you do.

I think I am ready now.


I lift my head from your knee and slip the toy between my teeth.  I turn and start crawling to the bathroom.  In no time at all, I bring the small black bag to you.  It is heavy between my teeth, but I am determined not to drop it.

You pull the bag from my grip and stand.  You step around me.  I can hear you laying items on the table, but I have no idea what it could be.  I desperately want to peak but I know better.

I startle slightly when your hand rests on my head.  I am losing myself in service.  My mind is calm, even though my body is still sensitive from play.  I breathe deeply and relax my shoulders.  

I can do anything you ask of me, Sir.  


“Come here piggie.”

I turn and crawl the few feet to you.

“Kneel up.”  Your hands are on my chainmaille collar and I feel the clasp give way.  You slide the metal across my collar bone and down my tummy until you drop it into my hands.  I feel the strip of leather of my formal collar tighten around my neck.  As always, my head tips up to look you in the eye.  You have it tight enough to get my attention and make me gasp.  You loosen it to your liking and buckle it closed.  You tug harshly on the frontmost O-Ring and stare me down.  The longer our eyes meet, the harder it is to keep eye contact.  

It only take a few minutes before you let go of my collar and my body drops heavy back onto my knees.

“Tonight, we are going to have company.”

My eyes widen.  We haven’t done this before Sir.  I mentioned it, just once, when you asked me what one of my deepest desires was.  I told you I wanted to serve you in public.  I wanted to conquer my fears and overcome my shyness, my hesitancy.

But now, I am extremely nervous.

“Look at me.”  I glance up.  “I am going to show off my little piggie.  I expect you to be on your best behavior.”

I look into your eyes and the moments tick by in silence.  You are waiting for an answer.  I am curious if you believe you will hear my agreement or my safeword.  

I have told you I can take anything you have to offer.  I am not ready to back down yet.

“Yes, Sir”


I find myself dressed in my gear.  My ears keep my hair back.  It helps, considering how much you love to see it down.  The silicone nose is situated over my natural nose.  I still hate it with a passion.  The idea of anyone but you seeing this makes me extremely uncomfortable.  My tail is situated snuggly in my ass.  I entirely hate how much I have come to love my tail.  I enjoy any opportunity when I am allowed to wear it.

I am kneeling at your feet, the tail uncomfortably bending and adjusting inside me.

I am facing the door, my head resting on your knee.  My body is tense.  My head is filled with chaos.  I am unsure of how much I want this.  Dreaming it, and doing it, are far different.

Your voice is soft behind me.

“We are going to lay a few ground rules.  Tonight, you are just holes to fill and abuse. You will enthusiastically serve them as you do me.  Your ass is off limits.  Is that understood?”

“Yes, Sir.”  My voice is soft but strong.  I make sure you clearly hear my answer.

“Do you have any questions?”

“No, Sir.”

Your fingers tighten in my hair and you pull my head back just enough to look at you.  “I know you will make me proud, little piggie.”  Your fingers release me hair and hook into my collar.  “This means you are mine.  I will always take care of you.”

“Thank you, Master.  I needed to hear that.”

You smile.  It is always a highlight of my day to see your smile.  It is so rare and you are always so reserved.

“Now, my little piggie slut, up on the bed with you.”  I crawl over to the bed and climb onto it, staying on all fours.  “They are going to be here soon.  I want you to relax for me.”  You remove my ears momentarily and put the hood over my face.  It is the one thing that makes me lose myself.  I hear nothing but the blood rushing through my ears.  I see nothing but the darkness of my eyelids.  I taste nothing as long as you keep the zipper closed.  You replace my ears and place a kiss to the top of my head.  “Lay down and rest.  I will wake you when it is time.”

With his blessing, I close my eyes and regulate my breathing.  A nap will do me good after everything today.


I woke to my body being bodily flipped onto my tummy.  There were hands on both my legs and they pushed them forward until I was forced onto my knees.  My face stayed against the mattress and my hands were caught underneath me. 

There are hands everywhere.  My breathing is erratic, and I am trying to figure out what is happening.  The zipper on my hood is undone and there is a thumb put into my mouth, pushing my tongue and jaw downward.

As soon as I felt it, I knew it was Master.  That is how he tests my self-control.  He will hold it for as long as possible to make sure I do not lick or suck without permission.  Being allowed to suck on his thumb is a rare reward.  I am oddly comforted under the pain. 

I feel fingers on my backside.  Someone is playing with the tail.  Every time they tug at it, or bounce it, it shifts inside me.  Then, without warning, there are two fingers inside of me.  I am unable to lube naturally.  I am guessing someone realized that as suddenly I felt someone spit on me.  I could feel it dripping down and it was warm as they pushed it inside of me.  

There was little prep.  Less than a minute later, there is a hard cock pressing into my semi-dry passage. I feel uncomfortably stretched.  I gasp sharply and as the man behind me starts to thrust harshly, there is a cock put to my lips.  There is a hand on the back of my head, adding pressure as they pushed as far back into my throat as they could.  My stomach and throat convulsed as my gag reflux was affected.  I inhaled through my nose as best I could, but the jarring movement, from the fucking, was making it hard to concentrate.

I tried to remember what Master had said.  That I would serve them enthusiastically.  I pulled back when he let my head go and brought myself up to my hands and knees.  Not knowing where anyone was, I opened my mouth and stuck out my tongue.

It is not long before there is a cock in my mouth again.  I am unsure if it the same person or not.  I do not know how many people Master invited over.  I bob my head, licking and sucking.  I want to make Master proud.  I am never happier than when I get to use my mouth.

I felt the guy behind me grip tight to my hips as he finished.  It eased the burn of the next one who took his place.  I’ve never been fucked so roughly.  I am slightly panicked because I do not know where Master is.  I trust he would not have left me alone, but I miss his touch right now.  

I feel so full.  It is brutal.  I know that I will most definitely feel this tomorrow.

I lose count quickly of how they rotate.  My jaw is sore, and my head keeps getting pulled in different directions to be fucked.

At some point, someone pulls my ears from my head and the hood is yanked roughly from me.  I close my eyes against the light.  I can hear the murmuring of one of the men.  “She really is a pig, isn’t she?  Look at the nose.”

I can hear Master chuckle.  “She is my little piggie slut.  She is such a dirty piggie.”

I can hear myself mewl at his words.  It both embarrasses me and makes me whine in agreement.  I am dirty and I would do anything for Master.  

I was flipped onto my back, my head hanging off the bed.  One thrust down my throat and another into my swollen cunt.  My hands were grabbed and placed on another.  I wrapped my fingers around him and started stroking.  At least I now have a number.  Master invited three people to have free reign of my body.  

“Do not come down her throat.  Piggies are meant to be dirty.”  Master ordered.

And as he ordered, one covered my stomach and the other my breasts with their cum.  The third filled my passage with even more cum.  I could feel it dripping out of me.  I felt tired and use. And dirty.

“Bring her here.”  I felt myself picked up from the bed and tossed bodily to the floor.  My arms were shaking, and I struggled to bring myself to my hands and knees.  “Hold her.”  I felt a boot push press against my back and push me back into the carpet.  My arms went flat above my head.  Another put pressed against my cheek and the last set held my hands in place.

I felt tugging at my tail.  I started to try and struggle.  My knees were pressed into the carpet, under my stomach, by the boot on my back.  I had nowhere to go.  I pulled and pulled but I couldn’t move.

“Please.  Please no.”  I didn’t know who was behind me.  Only Master could touch me there. The tears welled in my eyes.  I wouldn’t be able to get away.  I would fail Master.  “Please, no.”

“Quiet.  I will do as I wish to my little piggie.”  I sobbed at his voice.  The tailed popped from my ass and I felt my walls pulse.  It was weird being empty again. 

You must have read my mind.  Without any extra lube or preparation, you pushed into me until you were fully seated.  It hurt.  Your pace was just as brutal as the others.  “Please, Sir, it hurts.”  I cry.  All I want to do is move away from the pain.  My body is held in place.  My neck is starting to hurt from the position but I am more focused on the pain radiating through my back.  “Please, Sir.  It hurts….it hurts so bad.”

“Hush and push back against me.”  I hear you laugh softly.  “Is piggie stuck?  Isn’t this what you wanted?  To be on a spicket and tenderized?”

I sob again.  I am losing myself in the humiliation.  I feel so exposed.  I hurt and I am filled and covered in cum.  My ass burns.  I am unsure of how much time is passed before I feel your fingers tighten on my hips and you slam deep inside me.  I feel your cum fill my ass.  After you finish, I hear you tell them to release me.  I feel like my body is made of lead.  Out of the corner of my eye, I see you standing over me.  

I shakily push myself up, slower than I would have liked, until I am on my knees.  I open my mouth and gently take your cock into my mouth.  I clean your cock with my tongue and then release you.  

I lean down to the floor and kiss each boot three times.  Then I murmur a soft thank you before kneeling back up.  Our scene is done now.  The adrenaline starts to slow.

My body is shaking.  I am cold now.

You remove the nose from my face and your hand rests on the top of my head.

“You did good, piggie.”


I don’t remember you sending the others home.  I remember falling back to the floor and curling up.  It did not matter that I was covered in cum.  I was exhausted.  I never expected this.  My body shakes from the adrenaline.  

I remember my head being pulled into your lap.  You are talking to me but it is hard to understand.  When I finally come out of the white noise, you offer to run me a bath.  I don’t want to be alone, even if the warm water sounds relaxing.  I shake my head.  Aftercare is the only time you allow me to answer non-verbally.

You move to get up and my hands tighten on your jeans.  “Sir?”

“I am getting a cloth to clean you up.  Then we will curl up and you can get your skin-to-skin contact.”

“Ok.”  I sighed.  

As you come back and start to wipe me down, I am comforted.

You always know what I need, Sir.

Even as I feel worn down, swollen, and somewhat broken, I know you will always be there to pick me up and put me back together.  

You pick me up and place me on the bed.  You make sure I am covered, so the shivering will stop soon.  As you crawl in with me, you beckon me over.  I curl my head onto your tummy and hand rubs my back reassuringly.

I feel my head go fuzzy and as I start to drift, I slur out the question I seem to ask every time. “piggie do good?”

I am positive I hear you laugh ever so slightly as you tell me “Yes, you are my good girl.”

My eyes drift close and I smile as I fall asleep.  

You will always keep me safe.  

I can rest now.


My name is Joji.  I am 29 years old currently and I have been in and around the kink community about 15 years.I am a collared submissive to Magick42.  I am also a Daddy to a wonderful babygirl, and have been for more than three years now and I find it very fulfilling.  I am being mentored in and being taught electroplay.  I am a masochist at heart and thoroughly love impact play, especially caning.  I enjoy reading anything I can get my hands on and am a die hard Harry Potter and Doctor Who fan.  I am also the secretary for a group in Idaho called Moscow S.P.A.R.K.E (Simply Providing Another Route to Kink Education).  It is our mission to teach safe practices to those new to the community and give them a safe haven to ask questions and learn without judgement.  We accept all kinks and all we ask in return is respect between all our members.

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, daddy dom, fetish, kink, little space, littles, master, power exchange, sex, sexual fantasy, slave, slut training, submissive

Starting The New Year Right

January 10, 2021 By Christmas Bunny 2 Comments

two beautiful slave girls lying in bed awaiting their master
via stock.adobe.com

Interestingly enough, their polycule involved the men as metas.  Both women were submissive to the men, yet together things just work well between them.  The men liked each other quite well, which meant group vacations and dinners worked nicely, the men having their time with the girl each was dating, with the girls holding hands between them.  They were excited to ring in the new year together.

The men had decided on whips, Lacy’s Master whipping her front surgically, while Maggie’s Daddy placed his strikes neatly along her upper back and ass cheeks.  By the end, both women were crying, punctuated by sharp screams.  The men chuckled and wandered off to the kitchen to pour champagne to toast the changing of the year while Maggie crawled on all fours over to her nude and recently striped girlfriend.  She playfully licked Lacy’s nipple.  “Want me to lick your boo boos?” she teased.

Lacy slapped Maggie’s ass, not terribly hard, but hard enough to make her hiss.  Both girls began to laugh, curled around one another on the floor.

The men returned shortly, passing out glasses.  The girls only got a splash, just enough to toast with.  None of them were fans of mixing alcohol with endorphins, but they didn’t want to miss the possibility of good luck for the next year, particularly with as rough as the past year had been.

The seconds ticked by and the men claimed their kisses at midnight, the women acknowledging their dominance first, then turning to kiss one another after.  They all understood the relationship structure quite well.

The four of them stayed awake a while longer, laughing, talking, and watching fireworks over the water, then the men excused themselves to their separate room, leaving the women the rest of the house to themselves.

Normally neither of them was particularly aggressive, but the men had taken care of the warm-up for them.  Nestled on the couch together, Lacy deftly adjusted a leg and slid into Maggie’s embrace, who responded by wrapping her legs around Lacy.  They kissed passionately, happy to have the time together. 

Maggie kissed her way down to Lacy’s striped and perky breasts, avoiding the lash marks.  She rolled one of Lacy’s nipples into her mouth.  She grazed the pierced nipple with her teeth before working it just the way she knew Lacy liked it.  Lacy’s head fell back as she moaned, reaching for her partner to maintain their connected touch.  Lacy tucked a strand of Maggie’s hair behind her ear, then slid that same hand teasingly down the side of her neck, the outer curve of her breast, and down to her spread thighs.

Lacy’s fingers touched wetness and she moaned again in response.  Maggie hummed her pleasure, opening her thighs slightly wider for exploration.  Lacy pressed her fingers into Maggie’s wet cunt, delighting in just how much wetness pooled there.  She slid a glass carrot in to replace her fingers.  “How’s that, baby?” she murmured.  Maggie nodded breathlessly as she hummed again.  

“I want to taste you,” she whispered in response, nudging Lacy to her untouched back, sliding off the edge of the couch to position between Lacy’s legs.  She lowered her mouth to Lacy’s clit, sliding a finger in just as easily as the carrot had slid inside of her.  “You’re so wet,” she breathed, sliding fingers against Lacy’s g-spot.  “I want to make you cum,” she said shyly, licking at the engorged clit and feeling glass between her own thighs.

She worked hand and mouth until Lacy squirted her orgasm, squeezing that dildo rhythmically as her desire for Lacy combined with the continued rubbing sensation triggered her own orgasm.  She climbed back onto the couch, feeling sleep pull at her.  

They’d already arranged the sectional into a bed shape, stuffies and all, and nestled together they drifted to sleep, content in their own little world.


Christmas bunny has been exploring kink since she was legal to do so.  Her serious writing started in college, where she accidently got some of her papers published in educational journals.  She has recently expanded her writing to include her kink journey.  She began writing in the physical realm, but shed some of her inhibitions and began sharing those entries with others.  She now keeps an active blog of her personal growth and her relationship with her Master / Daddy Dominant and writes helpful educational posts on a variety of subjects.

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, fetish, kink, sex, sexual fantasy

Transitioning To The BDSM Lifestyle

January 10, 2021 By Baadmaster 2 Comments

naked male sub bound
via stock.adobe.com

I was speaking to a woman who said she wanted to explore BDSM.  She claimed to be a total newbie, although I doubted it.  Nevertheless, she asked me a question that I thought would be great for the ASK BAADMASTER series here on kinkweekly.com . So without any covid-19 talk for a change, here is her question.

Reader:  I AM A VANILLA WHO HAS BEEN READING A LOT ABOUT BDSM.  IT EXCITES AND INTRIGUES ME.  BUT WHEN I ACTUALLY TRY ANYTHING – EVEN THE MOST RUDEMENTARY SELF BONDAGE — I GET VERY DEPRESSED.  FURTHERMORE, I MET A REAL TIME DOMME ONLINE AND WHEN SHE TRIED TO INSTRUCT ME AND PERFORM SOME ROPE TIES, I STARTED TO CRY. SHE LIVES NEAR ME BUT I HAVE AVOIDED RE-MEETING HER. AM I JUST A WRONGF FIT FOR BDSM?  AM I DOOMED TO LIVE IN THE VANILLA WORLD.  HELPPPP!

They say everything has a purpose. Surely your internal being (for want of a better term) wants you to “improve” on your vanilla life.  And it appears that you want to “transition” from your vanilla lifestyle to one that appeals to you.  Most of us here have had to make that transition; very few of us are born “Oh great and wonderful Master or Mistress.”

And many here have not made this transition without some pain or doubt.  Fortunately, most of us were able to interact with lifestylers in the many social events that most cities offer.  Instead of social events, we have social distancing.  Not a good formula for making a smooth journey from vanilla to BDSM.  Add into that, you have given me little information as to your vanilla situation; I know not whether you are single or married, whether you have freedom to explore and other important life factors.  But I can give you some general advice that you can build on, so when the social aspects of this lifestyle return, you will be ready and not crying. (Unless crying is part of a scene or play.)  I will offer a half dozen essential questions that you should answer to facilitate your entrance into the real time world of BDSM.

  1. Are you depending on BDSM to be an escape from your current malaise?  Answer: I would not put all your escape eggs in one basket.  Examine your vanilla life and try to see the good in it so that you don’t approach BDSM out of  a sense of desperation.
  1. Don’t ask your vanilla friends for advice nor tell them you are going “bondage.” I once told an acquaintance that I was exploring BDSM.  He replied, “So you beat up your girlfriend?” Misconceptions abound, especially about this kinky world.  Best to keep it to yourself unless you find a vanilla friend of a similar mindset to you.  I might add that your soaking up all these misconceptions that fill the media could surface when someone flogs you or ties you up.  This could be the reason for your tears.
  1. Why throw away my support system? In this hypothetical example, you are not; you are merely electing to not use your vanilla friends (except for the occasional one who understands you deeply) as your support system.  Over time, you will find like minded people to emotionally ground you.  Best adage/advice: “Rome wasn’t built in a day.”  This transition will take time.
  1. Use this “no fun” respite to study as much as you can.  Learn about yourself.  Are you a Domme or a sub or a switch?  What play  excites you the most?  Are you into pain?  As Socrates wrote, “Know thyself.”  As BaadMaster opines, “Use Google.”  
  1. Important: analyze the play that brought you to tears.  For example, you might have had a bad experience in “vanilla choking”, thus being choked in a scene might bring out bad – or even unconscious — memories that make you cry.  Go over all the scenes you plan and avoid activities that make you uncomfortable.  You are under no obligation to try everything nor do things against your judgment – whether you are a Domme or sub.
  1. Finally, in the “I can’t believe BaadMaster recommends” advice, I would ask you to rent “Fifty Shades of Grey”  Granted it is very fanciful; the BDSM is often idiotic.  But it will put you in the mood for your new bondage adventures.  And it is always good for a laugh or two.

In closing, being a woman navigating a new lifestyle is tough enough, even if you have a support system.  And soon, I hope, when the dungeons and the socials re-open, you will find new friends and a new support system.  For now, following my six principles should make your transition a smooth one.


After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm community, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, bdsm toys, bottom, breath play, dominant, fetish, impact play, kink, power exchange, Spanking, submissive, Top

Negotiation And Consent

January 10, 2021 By SafferMaster 2 Comments

hot lesbian rope bunnies
via stock.adobe.com

Kink is a power exchange.  

How do you KNOW as a Top/Dom/Domme/Master/Sir/Mistress etc (collectively “Top”) that you have the consent of your submissive?  

As a submissive, how do you come to the decision to choose to relinquish your power safely? How do  you choose your Top?  

Let’s be honest, as a Top, if you did some of the things that run-of-the-mill kink play routinely involves to  a person who had NOT given you their consent, you might very well get charged, arrested, prosecuted  and convicted. 

Kink is a coin with two sides. It only works if the Top and the Bottom, the Dom and the Sub, the Master  and the slave are in alignment and it works best when there is full unconstrained communication.  

One of the toughest aspects around the issue of monitoring consent during a scene is that both the Dom  and the sub often experience mind-altering states that often makes clear communication difficult.  

Kink is intense. It is a must to negotiate the parameters from a place of clarity, and I would argue, with  complete authenticity.  

There is good reason to discuss what is on the table (bondage, impact play, needles, gags, and/or dildos,  for instance) as well as for how long, how intense, and what the limits are.  

Do you as a sub, know your limits? Are you wanting to test your limits? As a Dom, are you someone who  understands how to stretch limits within the boundaries of hard limits? Do you have an agreement on aftercare? 

Hard limits, those things you just won’t do, must be stated and agreed to without reservation.  

Kink requires safe words…I like the Yellow/Red combination. What does red mean? Do you end the scene or just move on to some other aspect of play? What about yellow? If I am flogging my sub and she  says “yellow” what that means in our dynamic is “back off a bit, but please continue.”

When he/she says “I give you my consent” do you know what that means for him/her, do you  understand his/her limits hard and soft? Do you know what he/she is expecting, for how long you have  his/her consent? Do you know what his/her safe words are, and the way he/she understands them?  

There is an argument, especially in pick-up-play, to be made for ongoing clarifications and requests for  consent to be made as the scene progresses in order to keep the participants on the same page. For  example, “I am going to spank you now with my bare hand, do I have your consent?” After spanking  him/her ask “I am going to increase the intensity, do I have your consent?” And so on.  

The most important part of the negotiation is really what happens after play, and what I call “the  debriefing”. It is during the discussion about what was done and how it went that you come to  agreement about what works and what does not. What is desired and what is designated as off limits, and not to be part of future play.  

Ongoing dynamics are negotiated power exchanges that do not generally require repetitive  conversations about consent, but in even well-established dynamics, there is a need to make sure that  the play evolves keeping both parties fully engaged in the experience.  

As a Dom, my view is that for me, a total power exchange is the perfect dynamic. Even in that dynamic,  because my submissive has agency, whenever we introduce new experiences in play, there is a  conversation before, during and after that addresses how she is doing, is she wanting more of what we  are doing, does she want harder impact, should we go on longer etc. The point is that we live in a 24/7  TPE and we enjoy an energetic connection that requires no words, so when we do new things, we speak  a lot about how it lands and how she likes it and how I can expand her limits and so on. Consent is an  ongoing conversation that we always engage in.  

Why do I say that one should be their authentic self when giving or seeking consent or negotiating  limits? Think about this, if you are a dreamy sub and have all the feels for the Dom you are negotiating  with and he says “I am into knife play” and for you, it’s a hard limit, but you don’t want to disappoint  and so you say “It’s a soft limit”, then you go into a play session with a major concerns and you cannot  relax and you are worried he is going to pull out a knife and you are worried about being cut and worse.  The scene will not go well for you or him. If you were your authentic self, and you said, “that’s a hard  limit”, then you would have no concerns about being cut or poked or scratched etc. He might have been  disappointed, and he might have made an attempt to negotiate. He might share that his way of  engaging in knife play may not be about cutting you, but instead be about getting you to move for him  to avoid being cut, for example, and it may be something you come to try and enjoy and look forward  to, but since you pretended to be interested in it, your head never got into subspace during the  scene….and so I think that it is best to be authentic. Only agree to things you know you can handle on  either side of the slash.  

If you are new at kink, there is a lot to consider in negotiating with a play partner. First, are you chatting  with someone with the same goal? Is this pickup play, are you thinking longer term? Are you clear what  the experience level is? Do you have knowledge of the tools planned to be used? Is there attraction? Are you clear in your thinking? Do you have a friend you are in communication with that knows where you  are going and who you are with? Are you negotiating about an evening or a weekend or longer? Does  the person with whom you are negotiating scratch your itch? Do they understand what you are seeking  exactly? Will there be penetration? Do you require condom use? There are so many details to get right.  The main thing is to be in communication so that if a detail gets missed, there is a pathway to resolving the issue.  

There comes a decision point in any negotiation. A point where, as a Dom, you get to ask the sub to give  you her consent. When I was in this situation with a new potential partner, I would have her go off in  private to do a task I requested in order to set the stage. After she made the decision to give her  consent, in order to demonstrate that she was in fact giving me her consent, the last step to bring the  negotiation to an end and to begin the scene, I would give her a butt plug and lube and send her to the  bathroom so she could have one more opportunity to consider what came next, and a chance for her to  choose to go forward or not in private without any pressure. She was given the choice to go and insert  it, with the instruction to bring me her underwear by way of confirming that she was giving me her consent. I have met with prospective subs where they chose to go forward and sometimes, they chose  not to go forward. Kink is as intimate as it gets. If a sub chose not to go forward, I would always honor  her choice, no questions asked. She must choose to submit from my point of view. Period.  

In the case of negotiating around discipline rather than play, when I negotiate with a sub for hard impact  play or brutal punishment as in the context of a discipline where accountability is the issue and sexual  contact is not at issue. In this case, I require her to give me her consent on video with her spoken words  so that if there was a later dispute, that would be time stamped evidence.  

Kink is very exciting, It’s very hot. It’s risky and edgy, and it’s super fun. BUT it’s only those things when  both sides of the slash are in full agreement without constraint.  

Be smart. Negotiate from a place of complete authenticity, and reach agreements that allow you to play unreservedly. Otherwise, how can you give your consent or accept the consent of your play partner?  


Lady Petra Playground  

A Kink Relationship Coaching Program offered by Lady Petra and SafferMaster  

Kinky Cocktail Hour Podcast  

Find Lady Petra Playground at https://www.patreon.com/LadyPetrasPlayground

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, communication, consent, negotiation

Why I Find Feminization Fantasies Insulting

January 10, 2021 By Ms. Rika 4 Comments

sexy feet in fishnets
via stock.adobe.com

I hope you have been enjoying Rika’s Lair, my monthly column dedicated to thoughts and experiences  regarding power dynamics in Service-Oriented D/s relationships. Look up “Ms. Rika” in the search box  for links to all of my articles in KinkWeekly!  

A very popular fantasy among submissive men, is the desire to be “forced” to be dressed like a woman.  Whenever I’ve heard this fantasy, I’ve challenged it: Why do men feel that dressing like a woman is  humiliating or degrading? They say they worship women, but then feel that being more like one is an  embarrassment. 

I’ve heard lots of reasoning based on what it’s like to grow up being a man – and the stresses of retaining  and demonstrating masculinity. That only a very powerful force would make a man go against that  masculinity – and therefore, is exciting to the man if he is made to be that way. 

My attitude has always been, live and let live – if someone gets turned on by it, then fine…let them. It’s  just not for me – and my submissives will not be engaging in it. Your kink is not my kink…and move on. I  still do feel that way, but I’ve always disliked the fantasy and found it denigrating…but I never really  could put my finger on exactly why it bothered me.  

Then, this morning, I was reading a post on FetLife from a friend of mine, @Miss_Malloree, who said: 

Am I the only one who’s noticed that there are very few men who fantasize about  being the woman who breaks through the glass ceiling at a major corporation, or  who owns and successfully manages a professional sports franchise, or who is elected president? As others have commented, they all seem to envision themselves  as being at the bottom of the food chain, rather than the top. 

And I said, “Holy Crap!” 

This is it…this is at the crux of why the fantasy is so distasteful to me. Maybe you’ve always seen this,  but for me, this was a revelation. 

The fantasy most submissive men have regarding cross dressing, is to become the “Sissy”, the “Slut”, the  “Maid”, the “Prostitute”, the “Geisha”. They’re not just pretending to be any woman, they’re pretending  to be a particular type of woman – one who is not high-achieving, or well thought of in society. They are  highlighting the (as Malloree says) bottom of the food chain. 

What that says to me is that, this is what these men really feel women are. Oh, I’m sure they’ll argue  that they recognize that women are successful and capable, smart and intelligent – but in reality – when  push comes to shove – women are maids, sluts, and sex-objects. Malloree suggested female corporate  executives and business people, but the fantasy falls short of even middle tier jobs: Teachers, Scientists,  Fire or Police professionals. No…they are going to be dressed up, overly made up, loose…forced to  “suck cock”. That’s the imagery they have – and they want – consciously, or sub-consciously.

Worse still, the presumption is that a dominant woman, given all the power that she has, will want to  convert him into that type of woman…as a means to embarrass him! 

I can hear the argument: That the lower level role is part of the humiliation. Sorry – I’m not buying it.  Why the focus on gender? Why not just be turned into a lower-class man? Forced to be a gigolo, or a  bum? No…this is LINKED to a gender swap. This is about weakness and vulnerability as a function of  being a woman. Being a man in this position is not low enough. They are implying that a lower-class  woman is lower on the food chain than a lower-class man. The lowest of the low. 

I have come to realize that the fantasy highlights what these men really feel about women. I’ve always  known the fantasy was insulting – but never quite understood why I felt that way. Now, I have clarity. I  wanted to share this with you and would love your thoughts! 


Ms. Rika is a lifestyle dominant, educator, and author; living in the suburbs of NYC with her  husband/slave. She has written several popular books on her approach to adding Dominant-Centric,  Service-Oriented D/s to relationships. You can find her books (in both print and eBook formats) at  Lulu.com (http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/msrika), or at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, the iStore, Books-A Million, Kobo.com, or anywhere books are sold. Search for “Ms. Rika”.

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm scene, feminization scene, fetish, kink

This week in kink: January 11, 2020

January 10, 2021 By Dexx 2 Comments

Feeling lonely and isolated during the pandemic?

Want to meet more people?

Then, check out this awesome list of the best hook-up sites from Reader!

Top 20+ Hookup Sites That Actually Work (2021 Edition)
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Chicago Reader

Many think that being a kinkster is linked to trauma. However, a recent scientific study has disbanded this ideology.

Click below to read more from Big Think!

Study shatters the myth that BDSM is linked to early-life trauma
No, being interested in BDSM does not mean you had a traumatic childhood.
Big Think

BDSM has become more normalized in recent years (key word being “more.” In a lot of areas it’s still not widely accepted, and is still viewed as deviant/taboo).

With this being said, Feminism in India touches on the normalization of kink, feminism, dominance/submission, history, and how this all relates to the expression of sexuality, gender, and the current political climate.

Click below to find out more!

We Need To Talk About The Normalisation Of BDSM | Feminism In India
BDSM is an acoronym that is broken down in three categories, Bondage-Discipline (B/D), Dominant -Submission (D/S), Sadism/Machoism (S/M).
Feminism In India

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Submissive Training For Dominants

January 10, 2021 By Evie Lupine 2 Comments

Want to learn more about s-type training?

Then, check out this riveting video brought to us by the fabulous Evie Lupine!

She never dissappoints!

Should Dominants be Trained... as Submissives? [BDSM]

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, dominant, fetish, kink, power exchange, sex, submissive, total power exchange

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