self bondage

How To Whip Yourself

November 14, 2020 By Dame TylerRose. 2 Comments

I frequently see questions about how to play by one’s self. In this day and age of plague, it’s particularly important to take care of our own needs. I have always been able to do so, not relying on a partner to give me the pleasures I like most.

This third self-play article will cover an easy impact technique anyone can use with a belt, flogger, and even a short single tail.

First, get a leather belt. If you don’t already have one in your play kit, you can get an inexpensive one from any decent clothing store. Target regularly has them for under twenty dollars. I have found beautifully broken in belts at thrift stores also. They clean up easily enough with soap and water and some shea butter or coconut oil for conditioner.

The length of the belt doesn’t really matter so long as it’s not too long. Something in the 30 to 36 inch range is fine. When folded over, it will be the perfect length.

Standing is a better position so you can swing freely and not smack the bed, chair or sofa. But on your knees on a bed works too.

Start off swinging around your ribs to your back. You may be surprised how much effort is needed to give yourself a good smack. It can be a pretty decent arm workout.

Then over your shoulders. The movies make it look so easy, don’t they?

Inner thighs are right there. Buttocks, back of thighs. Varying the speed changes up the force of impact.

A broken-in belt is easier than a new one, but a new one will be broken in after a few sessions. A studded belt adds another degree of intensity. Some people I know have liked to use the buckle end rather than the leather in the middle. Give it a try; see if you agree.

A game I have played:

Sit down to watch a show on regular television. Commercial comes on, pick up the belt and beat yourself with it until the show comes back. Sit back, watch the show. Commercial comes on, pick up the belt and beat yourself with it. The resting between lets the endorphins come forward into a delicious high – for me, at least. The high is my goal in the first place.

By the 45 minute mark, commercials created an almost Pavlovian response in me.

You can create your own games, such as “1 strike every time someone on a show says the word “the” or “and”, or says a particular character’s name. Then give yourself that many strikes at the next commercial break, or wait and add them all up when the show is over.

All of these things can be done with a short flogger also. Something fifteen to eighteen inches overall length will do. It needs to be hefty enough that the falls have impact. Too long and too thin is difficult to throw over one’s own shoulder and get the impact desired. Shorter is easier to control and strike where you want.

Guess what? You can use a short whip too! I bought a pair of mini snake whips from Highland Whip Design (Instagram – HighlandWhipDesign; Fetlife — https://fetlife.com/users/7280606) and they can absolutely be used to whip one’s self using the same around the ribs and over the shoulder techniques. In fact, while he was finishing them, I asked him if it would reach well for that and he did it on himself to confirm that, yes, absolutely, these will whip one’s own back.

Between these two how-to articles, you have four different implements you can use almost all over on your body. Start with the flogger for warming up. Move on to the belt and then the wooden spoon. Conclude with the whip for that final sharp sting. Hours of self-play are at your fingertips.

If you aren’t too hard on yourself, you can do this every day if you want.

——–

TylerRose. is known as Dame Tyler in the NYC public SM/Fetish scene. She is an award-winning author who has written two “lifestyle”, four cartoon, and over 25 fiction books.

Read her books on her Amazon page — https://www.amazon.com/TylerRose./e/B00HCPLSP2

You can also find more of her OP/ED work in Fetlife: https://fetlife.com/users/305828

FB Fan Page — https://www.facebook.com/TylerRoseGethis/

Twitter — https://twitter.com/DameTyler or @DameTyler

She enjoys crocheting and baking, and will no doubt die with a thesaurus open on her thigh.

Self-Bondage

January 22, 2018 By Baadmaster Leave a Comment

Although this might astonish you, I have known a number of people who practice self-bondage. Those who I have spoken with tend to do it on the lighter side. All seem to be in agreement that self-bondage cannot be as edgy as with a partner. Not only does “going light” eliminate a lot of danger, but it also gives you something to look forward to when you finally find a Master or Mistress – if that is your aim. It appears that self-bondage is a great way to keep you in bondage mode between Tops, much the same as masturbating when you are between sex partners.

That said, I have a few ideas that I have culled from these self-bondage practitioners; there seem to be many BDSM activities that work well in “solo mode.” Wax play done properly – see our kinkweekly.com article on wax play — really does not need a partner, either for the play itself or for safety considerations. (Other than the danger of fire – so be careful in that regard. Have a small fire extinguisher handy.) Sensory deprivation is also another self-BDSM scene that works well in solo mode. Putting on a sensory deprivation blindfold or mask can be very exciting. And, it entails very little risk. Wearing it for an extended period of time can be quite mind-altering.

Household items like clothespins offer the “self-BDSM” enthusiast the closest thing to an actual scene. Put clothespins on any part of your body and become your own personal pain slut. Once again, there is little danger here; you can take them off as soon as you have passed your pain threshold. If you need a little more pain, nipple clamps come in a variety of configurations. Put the good ole clover clamps on your nipples and you can get easily get into “who needs a Dom/me?” mode. The TENS unit also works perfectly in solo mode – perhaps it is the best of all self-bondage activities. The fact that you have a dial to control the intensity makes you both Top and bottom all at once in TENS unit play. Cupping, too, works well in self mode. Obviously, you do not have to negotiate a safe word with yourself!

No matter how inventive you are, it would be folly to suggest that you could approximate bondage with a Top in solo mode. I would not even entertain that as a legitimate aim. Instead, modify your concept to accept some realistic limitations. If you want to use cuffs, use Velcro cuffs. You can get out of them at any time – that is the beauty of them. Keep in mind you have no safe word – there is no one to hear it. Your “safe word” is your ability to escape your bonds alone. Velcro can be difficult to open – but far from impossible.

When it comes to ropes, you have to be careful. Tying ropes too tight can be risky even in a two-person scene, let alone in solo made. One good technique is to use karabiners instead of knots. (Karabiners are metal rings with a spring clip used in mountaineering; you can get them at a sporting goods store for about a buck each.) Cut various lengths of ropes and tie karabiners securely to the ends of each. Kind of like a bondage jigsaw puzzle, you can tie yourself up very thoroughly – but you can also click open a karabiners at any time to free yourself.

Clearly, none of these self-bondage scenarios can be considered “hardcore.” But, they can be very stimulating and entail little risk. Remember, you are alone and have no safety net – other than your cell phone — should something go wrong; the less inherently risky the play, the better.

Surprisingly, self-bondage has many practitioners – and, if you are one of them, you now know you are not alone. Remember, being both Top and bottom at the same time can be a bit confusing. Talk about “Topping from the bottom!”

By BaadMaster
After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

self bondage

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