Want to know more about impact play and impact toys?
Then, check out this awesome video from Kinky Assignments!
BDSM articles ideas bondage erotica resource
Want to know more about impact play and impact toys?
Then, check out this awesome video from Kinky Assignments!
As a top, I have always liked it when a bottom could hold out a back pack and say “You can use anything in here.” Whether or not I do depends on what’s in the bag, of course.
If it’s a needle kit or rope, I won’t be using any of it. Not interested. If it’s a Tens unit, I might. I’ve used one of those on myself, for my bad back.
Butt plugs won’t be used. I don’t put things in anyone’s ass. He can, however, go to the bathroom and slip it in himself. My cane may find the end of it for a number of smacks.
It is a commonly accepted thing. The top will buy the toys, have the toys, care for the toys, etc. Yes, I have quite the collection of things I personally enjoy using on other people. They are never used on me. They can be cleaned. Poppers are given to the person they were used on. But my kit is limited to what I am capable of carrying that day.
That sounds silly, I’m sure; but I live in NYC. I have to carry my kit up four flights of stairs just to begin to get to an event. Then there are another two to four sets of stairs to get out of the station when I arrive.
If I can keep my kit fairly light, bringing only three or four things, and can count on a bottom bringing his own fun things that are specific to him, together we have expanded our play repertoire without either of us relying entirely on the other.
I don’t have nipple clamps, unless you count clothespins or those very nasty clamps with bells (fishing line bell bobbin). I don’t have weights.
Until recently, I didn’t have wartenberg wheels. I did, however, know a bottom who brought them nearly every time he came to an event I was attending. Through using them on him, I decided to buy my own pair. I’m rather looking forward to meeting up with him again, and using both pairs at the same time. Mine in one hand and his in the other should make for a terrific scene.
I know bottoms who bring their own leg spreader; their own ankle/wrist cuffs, their own penis ropes. Things not used on other people. In this time of plague, having a kit of things to be used solely on yourself is an important investment. You don’t know how clean anyone keeps their kit. You don’t go home with them all to see what they do with their toys after the party. You don’t know how many people have already had it used on them at the party you’re attending. You can’t know.
Protect yourself. You know where your items have been. You know how they were cleaned because you did it yourself.
I used the word “investment”. Some things can be costly. It’s best to build your kit up over time. Keep in mind that a smallish woman may have a hard time handling a monster flogger. Find a more medium sized flogger that is easier to deal with but still gives the impact you want. Canes are easy and can be reasonably priced. There are numerous sellers all over Fetlife, Etsy, Ebay, Amazon. Ban-sticks, in Fetlife, is my favorite. I’ve bought four sets from her, I think. Three sets in different lengths for myself and one set as a present for my former husband.
Clothespins can be thrown away after use if you want. They’re not expensive unless you’ve put in the work and time to dye them.
Raid the kitchen for the wooden spoons or go to the dollar store and buy an inexpensive pack. You can wash and keep them to use again or discard after use. I know people who love the meat tenderizing mallet as well.
Rope. It’s easy enough to put in a pillow case and then into the washer. Cotton line can be put into the dryer. If you’re not doing suspension, cotton clothesline is fine. Don’t let anyone be snobby at you about it.
My point here is to not depend on the top to provide all the toys.
Plague or not, every bottom should have their own play kit full of fun things they like used on them.
TylerRose. is known as Dame Tyler in the NYC public SM/Fetish scene. She’s been doing this BDSM stuff for over 30 years in private and more than 10 years in public venues.
She is an award-winning author who has written two “lifestyle”, four cartoon, and over twenty five fiction books that you can find on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/TylerRose./e/B00HCPLSP2
You can find more of her work in Fetlife: https://fetlife.com/users/305828
FB Fan Page — https://www.facebook.com/TylerRoseGethis/
FB Regular page — https://www.facebook.com/TylerRoseAuthor
She enjoys crochet, coffee, and baking, and will no doubt die with a thesaurus open on her thigh.
Fifty Shades Darker, the sequel to Fifty Shades of Grey has released a second trailer and a new duet for the upcoming film premier in February. Love it or hate it, the film has still manageg to build more awareness and discussions around kink and BDSM.
This is a great article for submissives struggling to reconcile seemingly feminist views with their submission.
The Advocate points us in the direction of a New York tour that we could get on board with. This isn’t any double decker bus tour but rather a glimpse back in time when the Meatpacking District was the kinky center of New York. Check it out!
And speaking of New York fetish clubs-Donald Trumps daughter Tiffany is in a bit of a bind after allegedly being arrested for smoking pot at Paddles, a famous Manhattan kink club. We’ll keep an eye on this story as her court date approaches.
-Dexx
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