When discussing BDSM play techniques, we frequently talk about floggers, canes and whips. But, there is a softer, and equally important, part of BDSM that is often overlooked. And that is the art of sensual bondage. It might not be as dramatic, but it is sexy, beautiful and often just as thrilling as the most edgy of edge play.
For many submissives, just the touch of the rope is exhilarating; the simple act of being tied up by rope is a rush. It does not have to be tight; it does not have to be complex; it does not have to be escape-proof. The beauty of sensual bondage is that it offers yet another a way of experiencing the adrenaline rush that often is at the heart of a BDSM scene.
Since most BDSM play is based on a negotiated power exchange, there is no need to expertly tie the submissive Shibari-style. Basic rope work can serve a scene just as effectively as the most complex rope techniques serve its scene.
Wrist and leg ties are perhaps the most popular ties in erotic bondage. Once immobilized, the Top can (remember, we are talking about erotic bondage) stroke and play with the submissive.
Breast bondage is also relatively uncomplicated and does not have to involve pain. I am sure you have seen pictures of extreme breast bondage, wherein the breast can turn colors. (I do not recommend this for beginners!) But, simple, almost pain-free breast bondage can be just as exhilarating. When performing sensual rope bondage, don’t neglect the esthetics of the scene; it is part of its appeal.
Finally, when you wish to get to a more advanced style of sensual rope bondage, the rope dress is usually part of the program. Obviously more complex, it still has none of the pain or restraint aspects of total immobilization.
The beauty of sensual bondage is that you can experiment and invent new ways to use rope virtually risk-free. Since the ties are loose, there is little chance of injury.
I would be remiss if I didn’t stress safety – even in sensual play. What might be light play for most, can be heavy play for others. Being tied up, no matter how loosely, can be frightening for some bottoms – especially in public play in front of an audience. Even in light rope bondage, one should always follow these basic safety rules, which are:
Always discuss, and agree to beforehand, your safe words.
If you see the bottom in mental pain, end the scene. Even if he/she does not safe.
Don’t cut off circulation. Check to see that one finger fits between the bonds and the skin.
If you see skin discoloration, or other signs of severe discomfort, stop the scene whether the submissive is safe or not.
Don’t put rope around the neck, ever.
Have bandage scissors at the ready.
As I have stressed at nausea, “you can never be too safe.”
Now, as an added bonus, it is time for the rope tip of the day! Don’t use cotton rope. It frays and snags very easily and can lock too tight. And never use clothesline or nylon-synthetic blends. The best all-purpose rope is 3/8th’s to 5/8th’s inch nylon rope. And, as an added bonus, nylon rope is readily available in an array of colors. (The more advanced riggers use, in addition to the nylon we discussed, three other different types of rope: hemp, jute and multi-fiber polypropylene. But that is for another article!)
As I have stressed here at kinkweekly.com, there is no one way to do BDSM. To paraphrase, “Different strokes, or non-strokes, for different folks!”
So, if this type of bondage turns you on, simply follow the safety rules and, as the Nike ads say, “Just do it!”
About the Author:
After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.