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You are here: Home / Archives for orgasm

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Orgasm Control

February 20, 2021 By Baadmaster 2 Comments

dark haired submissive chained to bed
via stock.adobe.com

This is a question that is self-explanatory.  So here it is:

Reader: Orgasm control and denial are topics of interest for me. I’ve heard lots of good things, but also that it can cause negative side effects. What do you think? Any tips?

First things first.  Can denial produce negative effects?  Many old wives’ tales suggest this to be true.  Some claimed that too much sex is bad; others said that denial is the road to ruination.  In the Reefer Madness era, believe it or not, there were even ones that said you would go blind if you masturbated excessively.  Yet the worst that happened to me is that I wear contact lenses.  Negative effects from orgasm control are a similar urban sex legend.  Sexual denial usually produces no negative effects — other than causing fewer orgasms in your life. Albeit bigger ones!

The purpose of orgasm manipulation is basically to make for better, bigger more intense orgasms.  (Sounds like a late night TV advertisement for the Orgasmotron – but wait, there’s more!)  Most of us practice a form of orgasm control even in the vanilla sex world. — most men delay orgasm for as long as possible to increase mutual pleasure.  But in BDSM, we have raised this to an art form.  Let’s look at the two major classes of devices used in orgasm control – the “chastity belt” and the “cock cage”.

Since many things old become new, the chastity belt for females is making a comeback.  As we become a more  egalitarian society, it was only natural to expect chastity devices to be equally available to all sexes. Or to put it into Mad Men advertising language, “Chastity devices ain’t just for men anymore.”  The effect of a chastity belt worn by a submissive – both from a role play point of view and a control perspective – can be awesome.  Recently, lightweight plastic/composite belts have replaced the old bulky leather/metal ones; these high-tech belts are not the heavy locked affairs of Elizabethan times.  These modern versions are a unique (although expensive) way for a Dominant to establish the ultimate in orgasmic and sexual control. 

The cock cage too has felt the advancement of technology in its development.  From the early plastic versions (the CB 2000) to the modern stainless alloy types, just like face-masks, they are available in a myriad of designs.   (Once this pandemic is over, you can use your spare face-masks for BDSM play!)  But whether  used for pleasure or punishment – or anything in between – ultimately the aim of such devices is to make your play more exciting.  

There is no doubt that sexual denial can increase horniness.  (Just go to a singles bar on a Friday right after work.)  But if you practice sexual denial on purpose, you can increase the anticipation and raise the sexual excitement to a fevered pitch.  “Don’t masturbate (or have sex) until I see you next week” is a popular Dominant’s technique that can turn the submissive into a horny, sex-crazed obsessive by the time they see each other.  

Another technique of orgasm control is that of bringing a submissive to the brink of climax over and over again.  Whether ending in a “ruined orgasm” or a “super orgasm,” this “tease and denial” technique can be done over a period of hours (or days…WOW!) and can be excruciatingly exciting.  Coupling BDSM play with “tease and denial” in a s scene a great way to produce explosive orgasms.

There is one area I have left to last – the legendary training of a submissive to “cum on command.”  This has an almost mythic quality to it; it appears to be the ultimate Dominant achievement.  I have heard tales of a Master being able to order his slave to cum via telephone and the slave doing so without even touching herself.  I personally have never witnessed this; nor have I ever achieved this feat.

What I have done is to train a submissive to become extremely sexually excited via a voice command.  The training technique I use is to deny orgasm over a period of time, thus building a heightened state of arousal.  Then you link your voice command to this excited state – by stating your command at the time of highest sexual arousal.  This conditioned response training is one way to get closest to making the submissive “cum on command.”  And maybe, using this technique over a period of time, it can actually be accomplished.

As with all my suggestions, they are just that – suggestions.  So let me know your experiences.  Good luck!


After a ten year run as head writer for the legendary bondage.com, and an equally long run as the host of the hit internet show “Baadmaster’s Dungeon,” we are pleased to welcome the one and only Baadmaster to KinkWeekly. His thoughts about all things BDSM will now appear regularly on these pages. From the mental aspects of D/s to the nuts and bolts of S&M play, Baadmaster will cover every facet of this ever expanding lifestyle.

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm relationship, bdsm scene, dominant, femdom, fetish, kink, orgasm, orgasm control, power dynamic, power exchange, self masturbation, sexual freedom, submissive

How To Use A Squirting Dildo For Kinky Sex

January 24, 2021 By Kate Miller 2 Comments

chastity device toy
via stock.adobe.com

There is a common misconception that squirting dildos are only for female-female couples that want to add a penis into the mix without the hassle of introducing a third party. However, this couldn’t be more wrong. Sure, female-female couples can enjoy a squirting dildo during their fun sexual encounters, but so can everyone else. The erotic view of ejaculation and the internal stimulation of your partner “finishing” inside you is a delight that can be enjoyed by any kinky player.

There are certain times where a regular dildo just isn’t going to scratch your itch. Squirting dildos, also known as ejaculating or cumming dildos are usually designed with all the realism of a real cock, with the added delicious finish that regular dildos lack. Whether you decide to fill it with a semen-like liquid substitute that tastes like cum or a fruity flavored lube of your choice, you’ll be amazed at how much fun you can have when you have full control of when the member comes to an explosive finish. 

If you’re feeling kinky, here are the best ways to use a squirting dildo for a sexy and stimulating time!

When you want your partner to finish inside you.

Let’s face it: the thought of your partner finishing inside you is super-hot – there’s something about the visual affirmation that you are the reason for your partner’s orgasm that can make you feel so desirable. Cum fetishes are a thing! What’s less hot? Pregnancy, UTIs and 3am leakage. Sometimes, your situation doesn’t allow for your partner to cum inside you.

That’s why squirting dildos are ideal for those wanting to indulge that internal ejaculation kink, and there are plenty of ways to do it. You can start your encounter with normal penetrative sex and finish off with the squirting dildo, or you can use the squirting dildo as the main course. The fun part of using a dildo for ejaculation is that you also decide what size you want your dildo to be. So, if you really want to get kinky, you can pick out a dildo an inch or two larger than your cock to use on your partner, if they so desire. That way, you can take their pleasure to another level after they’re already wet and stretched out from you or the toys you were using earlier, before finishing with a bang.

To add a kinky element to your usual routine.

If you’ve been with your partner for a while, chances are you’ve got a solid routine going. But what if you want to change it up with some bondage cuffs? Are you ready to try other sex toys? 

Maybe you’ve used dildos before, and they work great for you and your partner. Squirting dildos aren’t so far off from regular dildos – the only difference is the fact that you fill it up with your lubricant of choice, and hit a button when you want it to erupt. Whether you and/or your partner have a cock or not, there are tons of ways you can indulge in kinky play with these dildos.

Firstly, you can have your partner kneel in front of you while you shower their face with cum and delight in the erotic view of watching jizz drip down their face. If it’s a female-male couple, she can wear it on a harness and treat you to some pegging. You can also simply indulge in a creampie fantasy. If you want to change things up, a squirting dildo is a great place to start.

If you suffer from ED or premature ejaculation.

If you suffer from ED or premature ejaculation, squirting dildos may just be the perfect accessories to have on-hand to reduce pressure and allow you to still have a fun, sexy time with your partner. When you know that you have a back-up plan in case things don’t go as planned, you can relax and enjoy time spent with your lover instead of worrying about your performance.

You can use the squirting dildo in any way you like – strap it onto a harness, use it in-hand or suction cup it onto the floor and watch your partner turn you and themselves on as they ride it all the way to climax. Give the partner being penetrated control of the sperm reservoir (the bulb or syringe) so they can release the sperm right as they orgasm!

To role play having a threesome.

Threesomes aren’t for everyone, but there are some twosomes that may wonder what it would be like to have one. Better yet, what it would feel like. But not everyone is ready to introduce a third person into the bedroom, for a variety of reasons: jealousy, sexual health, or even just not being fully into it.

However, with a squirting dildo, you can enjoy all the perks of having a third party, without any issues that could come with it. Whether you stick it in your partner’s anus while you slip your cock into her vagina, or if you want to watch him suck on a dildo with a facial finish while you please him from behind, it can be incredibly sexy and stimulating to have one, two or even three cocks in the mix!

For females, there are some squirting dildos with suction cup bases so she can stick it onto the wall or window to simulate doggy while she pleasures you, or you can penetrate her vagina with the dildo while you finger her asshole for the ultimate dual climax, finishing her off with a lovely dose of warm cum all over her stomach. 

Whether you already own a squirting dildo or are planning to add one to your toy box sometime soon, I hope this article gives you some ideas on how to use it for some fun and kinky sex. 

What’s your favorite way to use a squirting dildo?

-Sponsored Post


Sex toy writer and reviewer for HotCherry. Kate covers everything from dildos to bdsm toys and everything in between.

Tagged With: bdsm, bdsm play, bdsm scene, dildos, ejaculation, female orgasm, orgasm, orgasm control, sex, sex toys, squirting

This week in kink: June 18, 2018

June 18, 2018 By Dexx 3 Comments

02_dita_von_teeseDita Von Teese shot by Danny Stygion

Check out Danny Stygion’s e-book, How to Create and Sell a Digital Magazine. Release date is this Friday, June 15.

The e-book includes a step-by-step guide on how to design and virtually distribute a digital
magazine with e-mail marketing and social media promotion advice.

Also, check out his amazing photography featured in this week’s issue!


About Danny Stygion

Danny Stygion (born March 21, 1980) is a photographer, magazine publisher,
filmmaker, and podcaster. He is the co-founder and editor of Sinical
Magazine, established in November 2010. Sinical Magazine focuses on
alternative culture and fetish fashion and has featured the world’s top
alternative models such as Dita Von Teese, Masuimi Max, and Bianca
Beauchamp. The Sinical Magazine Podcast was founded in 2015.

In 2013, subspace Magazine was launched, focusing on professional
Dominatrices and BDSM.

In 2015-2016, he produced a series of magazine issues for NightCulture,
Inc., a producer of live electronic music events.

In late 2016, he co-founded an independent film and video production
company called LP-1126 Productions.

Click here to check out his website


11_nova_nymphNova Nymph shot by Danny Stygion

Be sure to check out Sharesome, the new NSFW social networking site that allows you to post videos, photos, and links that often are banned by other social media sites

Click here to visit the site


12_jewell_marceauJewell Marceau shot by Danny Stygion

Learn about the Mile High Dungeon in Denver, Colorado. It has been known as one of the best dungeons in the United States

Click here to read more


04_ludella_hahnLudella Hahn shot by Danny Stygion

Sex workers are helping women to achieve better orgasms using weed lube

Click here to find out more


Have some kinky news to share? Tell us about any upcoming BDSM events, new products, dungeon openings / closings, collarings, kink in mainstream media, and anything else you think kinky folks might be interested to hear about. Send your tips through to kinkweekly@gmail.com, and it might just end up on next week’s “This Week in Kink”

Tagged With: bdsm, Danny Stygion, dom, dominatrix, dunegons, fetish, kink, Mile High Dungeon, mistress, orgasm, sex, sex worker rights, Sharesome, sub

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